Do Over
by TKegl
Summary: Every Christmas Eve, Edward Cullen sits in a bar and regrets the decision he made ten years earlier that tore Bella from him. But when he gets a second chance to right that wrong, it's not quite what he expected
1. Chapter 1  City Sidewalks, Busy Sidewal

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:** (Updated 12/3/13) Do Over is now formatted for eReaders - FREE download link is on my profile. :-)

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**Chapter 1 – City Sidewalks, Busy Sidewalks**

Snow fell softly on the city streets as people rushed here and there trying to get to Christmas Eve festivities, wives gripping their husbands' arms to avoid slipping on the icy sidewalk. Down the street, a man in a Santa suit stood next to a Salvation Army bucket, haphazardly ringing a bell. Teenage boys who had snuck out after dark laughed and threw snowballs, trading sips from a bottle of vodka swiped from a father's liquor cabinet.

Edward Cullen heard none of it.

He sat at a nondescript bar, as he had every Christmas Eve for the past ten years. Different cities. Different bars. The same memories.

He frowned at his distorted reflection in the mirror behind the bar, swirling his drink idly, then taking a sip with a slight grimace.

"Mind if I sit here?" A pretty blonde appeared in the mirror next to him, but Edward didn't turn to face her. He just shrugged in response and watched her reflection distractedly as she climbed onto the stool next to him.

She smiled at him in invitation. "Sure is cold," she said. "Thought I'd just stop in here to warm up. Oh!" She looked up at the TV in the corner and her smile widened. "I love this movie!"

Edward followed her gaze, recognizing a familiar scene from _It's a Wonderful Life._ George Bailey was about to jump from the bridge, in the hopes that his life insurance would pay off his family's debt. Edward watched in silence as Clarence – the angel sent to save George's life – beat him to the punch and plunged into the icy water.

"I watch it every year, and it still makes me cry," the blonde said quietly, propping her elbows on the bar.

Edward nodded slightly and swallowed the rest of his drink, rolling an ice cube around his mouth once before letting it plop back into the glass.

"I'm Tanya," she said tentatively, a little put off by Edward's indifferent demeanor.

Edward took a breath and forced a slight smile, not wanting to offend the girl. She seemed nice enough. It wasn't her fault he was in a terrible mood and intent on wallowing in that mood for the rest of the night.

"Edward," he said finally, catching the bartender's attention and lifting his empty glass. The bartender nodded and Edward pointed to Tanya, indicating he should bring her a drink as well. Evidently, Tanya was a regular, because the bartender didn't ask what she wanted, but delivered a clear drink in a tumbler along with Edward's whiskey.

"Thanks," she said with a smile, sipping her drink.

"Gin and tonic?" Edward asked.

"Vodka Collins," Tanya replied, running her finger around the rim of the glass. "So…Edward…you on your way to a party?" She glanced down at the engraved invitation lying on the bar, next to a thick hardback book.

_Her_ book.

Edward took another gulp of his drink. "Decided not to go," he said shortly.

Unthwarted, Tanya persisted. "Yeah," she said, "I can see where a dim and dusty bar would hold much more appeal than a big, glamorous charity party at…" She glanced at the invitation again and smirked slightly. "…the Four Seasons."

Edward said nothing.

"Wait a second, the Four Seasons?" Tanya continued. "I read about that in the paper. Isn't Isabella Swan supposed to be there?"

Edward cringed slightly, hearing her name spoken aloud.

"Yeah…" Tanya reached for the book, flipping it over so she could see the cover. "Oh my God, I love _Cold Winter Nights_! The whole _Nights_ series is amazing," she continued, her own excitement making her oblivious to Edward's discomfort.

"Isabella Swan is my favorite author," she gushed. "They were giving away a couple of tickets to the party on the radio, but I couldn't get through. I can't believe you have an invitation and you're not going!"

Tanya paused, and Edward fought a heavy sigh, knowing she was hoping he would give her his invitation, or at least ask her to go along. He glanced at her in the mirror. She was flipping through his copy of _Cold Winter Nights_ with a smile on her face. He'd intended to go. To finally see Bella…speak to her. He'd ducked into the bar only to garner a little liquid courage.

He was still waiting for the courage to kick in.

It had been ten long years since he made the biggest mistake of his life. He'd had the ring in his pocket, but at the last minute opted to give Bella the silver bracelet he'd purchased as a backup Christmas gift instead. She'd smiled and thanked him, of course, but it was just a few days later that they had The Talk.

The _"Do We Have a Future?"_ Talk.

The _"Are We Moving Forward?"_ Talk.

The _"Will You Commit to Me or Leave Me Behind When You Take That Internship in New York?"_ Talk.

He'd let her go. He said he wasn't ready and Bella's eyes had filled with tears. He'd left her behind, moved to New York, and tried not to look back.

But on Christmas Eve, looking back was all he could do. The "what-ifs" just about drove him crazy, and instead of missing her less with each passing year, he found he actually missed her more. He'd picked up the phone a hundred times to call her, but shame and guilt kept him from dialing her number. Plus, there was the fact that nothing had really changed. He was still in New York, pursuing a career in television journalism. She was still in grad school in Seattle, and from what little he'd heard from mutual friends, she'd moved on.

He hadn't. He tried dating, but never really connected with anyone. He tried one-night stands, but found them unfulfilling. So he focused on his career, working long hours, moving up the ladder, and trying not to think about what he'd left behind.

It only got worse when Bella's first novel hit the New York Times Bestseller list…as did her second. Soon, her picture was in every bookstore…on TV commercials…her soulful brown eyes seemed to be surrounding him, watching his every move.

It was torture.

So when the network offered him a foreign correspondent position, he'd jumped at the chance. He traveled the world, reporting on wars, famine, drugs, politics…and spent as little time in the United States as possible. He lived out of a worn duffle bag, roaming from disaster to tragedy, and avoiding civilization as much as he could. But now, after six years on the road, he'd been given the opportunity for a special weekly segment on the nightly news. It was an offer too good to pass up, but it meant less time out of the country. He came back to New York to meet with his Executive Producer and found out all of the senior management and on-air talent had been invited to a charity party.

Where Isabella Swan was to be the guest of honor.

To see her name printed on the invitation was jarring, to say the least. In that moment, he decided he was going to go to that party and see her. Say hello…and finally lay the past to rest. He'd even bought a copy of her latest book so he'd have a reason to approach her.

He'd already read it, of course – numerous times. He always snagged a copy of her books as soon as they were released and devoured them quickly, straining to find a glimpse of who Bella had become in the printed lines. His own copy of _Cold Winter Nights_ was dog-eared and cracked, the dust cover torn from his repeated readings. Tanya was right – the book was amazing.

"Edward?" Tanya's voice made him realize he'd been staring off into space. "You okay?"

Edward sucked an ice cube out of his drink and crunched it slowly. "Yeah. Just thinking."

"Want to talk about it?"

Edward shrugged.

"Might help," she suggested.

Edward considered Tanya's offer. For some reason, he liked her…felt he could trust her. He'd just met her, but she almost felt like a friend and, the truth was, he had very few of those. His tongue was also a little loose, given the whiskey he'd had, and he thought it might be nice to have someone to talk to.

What the hell. He was in a wallowing mood. Why not add whining to the equation? Edward reached for the invitation, running his fingers over the engraved lettering, then tapping it against the bar lightly.

"I was actually on the way to the party when I stopped in here," he said finally.

Tanya sipped her drink. "And…" she prodded.

Edward exhaled heavily before he continued, "…and, I just can't bring myself to get up and go."

"What's stopping you?"

Edward grimaced slightly. "Bella."

"Bella?" she repeated slowly before her mouth dropped open. "You mean Isabella Swan? You _know_ her?"

"I did. It was a long time ago." His eyes focused on Bella's name in gold, sparkling script on the invitation.

Tanya studied him for a moment before she nodded slowly in understanding. "I should have known."

Edward turned to her in curiosity. "Known what?"

"Haven't you heard?" she replied wryly. "All the good ones are either married or gay…or still in love with the one that got away."

Edward flushed slightly. "Is it that obvious?"

"Only to an extremely gifted judge of character."

Edward chuckled.

"I never thought a guy who dodges grenades for a living would be such a chicken," Tanya teased.

Edward's eyes widened. "How did you know—"

Tanya waved a hand before picking up her drink again. "It took me a minute to place the face, but I do watch the news." She rolled her eyes at his shocked look. "Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me, Edward. But seriously, this is obviously killing you. Don't you want to at least _try_ to see her?"

Edward swallowed down the rest of his drink, a warm numbness finally drifting from his stomach to his extremities. Of course he wanted to see her…needed to see her.

He could do this.

Taking a deep breath, he offered Tanya a shaky smile. "Want to go to a party?"


	2. Chapter 2  Silver Bells

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:** Okay, early update to kind of ease the Tanya fears. I knew people would kind of freak about her but yes, she is nice…and the only reason Edward invited her along is because he needed the moral support, and she's a huge fan of Bella's and he wanted to do something nice for her because he helped him get up the courage to go to the party. Maybe not the best decision, but our dear Edward is not perfect. Shocking, I know. LoL!

Hope that clears up any concerns about Tanya, at least. On to the party…

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**Chapter 2 – Silver Bells**

Edward felt nausea set in as they headed for the Four Seasons, each passing block adding to the lump of anxiety in the pit of his stomach.

"You okay?" Tanya's worried gaze proved his inner turmoil was more than evident on his face.

He shrugged. "Yeah. I just…what if she hates me?" he murmured quietly.

To her credit, Tanya didn't try to gloss over Edward's concerns. "Maybe she will," she said bluntly, "but isn't it better to know for sure? It's pretty obvious you can't move on with your life without knowing for certain that it's over with her.

"And there's always the chance that she misses you as much as you miss her," she pointed out with a light touch on his arm. "That's worth the risk, isn't it?"

Edward nodded, his swallow sticking in his throat as he turned to look out the window. The cab pulled up in front of the hotel and with a deep breath Edward got out, turning to offer his hand to Tanya as she alighted.

"Here goes nothing," he said with a weak grin as he released her hand.

Tanya patted at her hair. "Are you sure I look okay?" She'd insisted they stop at her apartment so she could at least change into a dress and freshen her makeup.

"You look fine…I mean… _great_," Edward amended with a smile.

Tanya just tossed her head. "Sweet talker," she replied. "Come on. Let's go get your girl."

They walked across the hotel lobby, and Edward barely noticed the three-story-high grand columns sweeping upward to the backlit onyx ceiling. Tanya, however, took it all in with wide eyes – from the marble floor to the twenty-four-foot Christmas tree decorated with twinkling lights and sparkling ornaments.

"This is incredible," she murmured, but Edward didn't hear her. His eyes were on the entrance to _The Garden_, the restaurant off the hotel lobby where the party was being held. He felt Tanya take his hand, squeezing it in encouragement before letting it go as they walked into the restaurant and he handed his invitation to a man at the door. He gripped his copy of Bella's book tightly as their eyes adjusted to the dim interior. The only light in the spacious room came from the candles on the tables and the thousands of twinkling Christmas lights entwined in the room's trademarked Acacia trees. Edward couldn't focus on the atmosphere, however. His eyes scanned the room anxiously, searching for the face that had haunted his dreams for years…Hell, for as long as he could remember.

Then he saw her.

She was standing on the opposite side of the room, her face glowing as she smiled at the people around her. She was wearing a black cocktail dress, shot through with some kind of silver thread that caught the light, causing her to almost sparkle under the twinkling trees. Edward's eyes drank in her form, sliding down her body to take in the long legs peeking out from the short hem of the dress, and the teetering heels she never would have worn when he knew her.

She laughed, and Edward's breath caught.

Even over the voices in the crowded room, he recognized her familiar tinkling laughter and his gaze shot to her face to see sparkling eyes and a light flush staining her cheeks. If Bella ten years before was pretty…gorgeous, even..._this _Bella was breathtaking – her natural beauty heightened by the confidence of a woman who'd come into her own.

If Edward had any doubts before that moment that he was still in love with her, they were obliterated.

He was lost.

"Are you just going to stand here staring at her?" Tanya whispered, elbowing him lightly. Edward jumped slightly at the intrusion into his little Bella bubble.

He cleared his throat. "No. I'm going," he said, grabbing a couple of champagne flutes from the tray of a passing waiter. He handed one to Tanya and drained his own in a couple of quick gulps before squaring his shoulders and turning to walk toward Bella. He took one step and stopped in his tracks.

A tall, dark-haired man approached Bella, handing her a drink and placing his hand on the small of her back possessively. She smiled up at him and sipped her champagne as he leaned in and kissed her cheek softly. They turned together to talk to the couple in front of them and again, Bella laughed at something one of them had said. She leaned slightly into the man's body, and Edward felt his blood heat.

_Who the hell was that?_

Unconsciously, he took a few steps backward.

"Edward?" Tanya was watching him warily. "What are you doing?"

"I can't…" Edward shook his head slowly. "I've got to go."

"Don't you want to talk to her?"

"I can't," he repeated, his eyes still focused on the man who'd apparently replaced him.

Tanya looked longingly toward Bella. "Okay…we can go," she said quietly. "If you're sure…"

"No, it's fine," Edward said hurriedly, thrusting his book into Tanya's hands. "Take this. Go get an autograph. Have fun."

"Edward, I don't need to…"

"No, it's okay," he stammered. "I just need to be alone. You've been great…just have a good time, okay?"

Not waiting for her response, Edward turned on his heel and practically ran out of the restaurant and across the lobby, only stopping once he'd emerged onto the snow-covered sidewalk. He pulled his coat tightly around him and turned to the left, not sure where he was headed.

She'd moved on.

He'd lost his chance.

He'd lost her.

_Oh, God. He'd lost her._

The reality hit him like a ton of bricks. Over the years he'd held on to the hope that someday they'd find their way back to each other. Somehow, once they'd done what they needed to do, they'd have their second chance.

But no.

_No._

He huddled in his coat, his head down as he stomped through the snow, his head swimming with the lost opportunities…his heart breaking all over again.

Edward had no idea how long he wandered the wintry streets, avoiding eye contact with anyone he encountered, and ignoring the happy sounds of Christmas around him. A passing car hit a slushy puddle, splashing icy water up his leg and Edward barely noticed.

She was gone.

_Gone._

God, he was such idiot. If only he'd had an ounce of courage, he'd have proposed ten years ago. They'd be together today. He'd be the one with his hand at her back. He'd be the one bringing her champagne and making her laugh.

He'd be the one loving her…being loved by her.

The sound of angry voices brought Edward out of his bout of self-loathing. He looked up and realized he had arrived back at the bar where he'd started off the evening. A group of men were in the shadows of an alley next to the bar, and it took a moment for Edward to understand what was happening. Two large men dressed in black were standing over another, smaller man cowering on the ground. As Edward watched, one of the men pulled his leg back and kicked the smaller one in the stomach. The man cried out in pain, clutching his stomach.

"Hey!" Edward called out on instinct. "Hey – what do you think you're doing?"

The men turned to him, and to Edward's surprise, took off running down the alley. Edward hurried over to the man lying on the ground, glancing up to see the attackers had disappeared around a corner. He crouched down over the victim.

"Are you all right?" he asked, reaching for his cell phone. "Don't move. I'll call an ambulance…and the police."

"No. It's all right," the man said, sitting up and running his hands through his hair and over his rumpled shirt. "I'm fine. You scared them off before they could really hurt me."

Edward watched the man warily as he stood up. "Are you sure? That big guy kicked you pretty hard."

The man grinned and patted his stomach. "I'm tougher than I look," he replied.

Edward hoped so, because the guy didn't look tough at all. Blonde and baby-faced, he looked young, but for some reason his bright blue eyes had an air of wisdom that made Edward believe he was older than he thought. He was dressed in a white shirt and faded blue jeans – no coat – and Edward was surprised to find there was not a speck of dirt on him.

Weird.

"I'm Michael," he said with a smile, holding out his hand. Edward shook it gently.

"Edward," he replied automatically. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Michael waved a hand. "I'm fine, thanks to you. Not a lot of people who would have intervened in a situation like that."

Edward just shrugged, a little embarrassed by the praise.

Michael looked up at the neon sign in the bar window. "Can I buy you a drink? It's the least I can do."

Edward started to refuse. The last thing he needed was more alcohol in his depressed state. But Michael was watching him with such a look of gratitude and enthusiasm, he found himself accepting the offer.

They walked into the dimly lit bar and Edward took a seat on the same stool he'd had before. Michael sat down next to him and held up a finger to the bartender, ordering two Jameson's on the rocks. Edward blinked in surprise that the guy would know his drink of choice.

Michael grinned. "Lucky guess," he said.

"So, Edward," he continued, ignoring Edward's mystified expression. "What are you doing wandering around the city streets on Christmas Eve? Don't you have somewhere to be?"

Edward took a gulp of his drink, relishing in the burn as it made its way to his stomach. "Nope."

"No? Me neither. Just hanging out, enjoying the atmosphere," Mike said brightly.

Edward raised an eyebrow. "Didn't look like you were enjoying it much."

Michael shrugged. "Oh, well…that's in the past. No point in dwelling on it," he replied cheerfully, swirling the ice in his own drink. He had yet to take a sip of it, and when he noticed Edward had already drained his, he slid it across the bar to him. "Help yourself," he said. "I'm not really much of a drinker."

Edward nodded in thanks and lifted the glass to his lips. He absently noticed familiar dialogue coming from the TV above the bar and looked up to see the same scene from _It's a Wonderful Life_ playing again – when George was about to jump from the bridge. Edward assumed they were running a Christmas Eve marathon or something.

"Great movie," Michael said quietly.

Edward just drank his whiskey, letting the cool liquid warm in his mouth before trailing down his throat. He could feel the slight numbness move through his body, slowing his movements and relaxing his muscles. He watched the old black and white movie silently, listening to the familiar lines.

"_I'm worth more dead than alive," George lamented._

"_Now look, you mustn't talk like that," the angel, Clarence, said reproachfully. "I won't get my wings with that attitude. You just don't know all that you've done. If it hadn't been for you…"_

_George interrupted, "Yeah, if it hadn't been for me, everybody'd be a lot better off…my wife, and my kids, and my friends…"_

"Sad, isn't it?" Michael drew Edward's attention. "To be so full of regret."

Edward said nothing, the whiskey and the warmth of the room making him sway slightly on his stool, his eyes still focused on the screen.

"_So you still think killing yourself would make everyone happier, eh?" Clarence asked._

"_Oh, I don't know," George admitted. "I guess you're right. I suppose it would have been better if I'd never been born at all."_

"You ever feel like that, Edward?" He turned to see Michael studying him intently.

"Like I want to kill myself?" Edward scoffed. "No."

"No, that's not what I mean," Michael replied softly. "I mean, have you ever felt like you've failed? Like if you could go back and do things over again, you'd make different choices?"

Edward shrugged, draining his glass. "Who hasn't?"

"What would you change, Edward?" Michael asked, Edward squirmed slightly under his scrutiny. "If you could fix one mistake in your past, what would it be?"

Edward considered the question for a moment. He didn't know why he felt compelled to answer such a personal question posed by a stranger. Perhaps it was the alcohol…or the emotional turmoil of the evening. Maybe he was just feeling sorry for himself. Whatever the reason, he found himself saying just one word.

"Bella."

Michael smiled and patted Edward on the shoulder. "I need to go," he said abruptly, getting off his barstool. "Thanks again for your help tonight, Edward." He reached into his pocket and placed a shiny metal ball on the bar in front of him. It took a moment for Edward to recognize it as a jingle bell. With a wary eye on Michael, he picked it up, the bell tinkling slightly.

"If you ever need me, just give that a jingle," he said seriously. "It only works three times, so make sure it's really important, okay?"

Edward was confused, and wondered if he was drunker than he thought…or if Michael was some kind of lunatic. "What are you talking about?"

A huge grin split Michael's face. "I'm talking about second chances, Edward. An opportunity to set things right."

Edward stared at him blankly for a moment before erupting in laughter. The guy was obviously crazy. "Okay…right…yeah," he said, putting the bell in his pocket. "Thanks for the drink." He lifted his nearly empty glass in salute.

"Don't lose the bell, Edward," Michael warned, suddenly solemn. "If you do, there won't be any way for me to help you."

Edward stared at him for a moment, his smile falling as a slight shiver raced up his spine. "Who are you?"

Michael smiled softly, then turned for the door. "Go home and go to bed, Edward," he suggested. "There's a cab outside. It'll all make more sense in the morning." He walked out, the door drifting shut silently behind him.

Edward stared at the door for a moment, then turned back to the TV, finishing his drink as he watched a little more of the movie. He set the glass on the counter, along with a five dollar tip, and headed outside. Sure enough, there was a cab waiting at the curb, and Edward got inside and slumped against the seat, tugging his tie loose as the driver pulled away from the bar.

The drive back to the hotel was quick and filled with flashes of Bella – memories of their time together…laughter and tears…always interspersed with the new, troubling images of her with the tall, dark man.

_Bella…_

_If only…_

"Hey, buddy, is this the place?" The cab driver's voice jarred him out of his thoughts.

Edward looked out the window at his hotel and nodded at the driver, handing him a twenty before getting out. He took a deep breath, focusing on walking a straight line through the lobby and into the elevator, giving in to his inebriation and leaning against the wall once the doors shut. He managed to make it down the hall and to his room, getting the door open after three attempts. He shrugged out of his jacket as the door closed, toeing off his shoes before falling into the bed, fully dressed. He felt a digging in his hip and reached into his pocket, pulling out the little bell with an irritated moan.

He fell asleep with it clutched in his hand, giving into the oblivion of a dark, dreamless sleep.

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**A/N: **Now, don't get too upset with Edward, please. He knows he made a mistake, but he's unsure of what to do about it. I promise, he will redeem himself before the end of the story. Next update will be tomorrow. Thanks for reading.


	3. Chapter 3 Rockin' Around the Christmas T

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_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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**Chapter 3 – Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree**

A loud whirring sound pounded its way into Edward's brain. He moaned, pulling the pillow over his head and wishing whoever was stabbing ice picks into his eye sockets would please stop.

Immediately.

The whirring paused, only to start up again and Edward rolled over, giving up on any hope of sleeping off his hangover. Maybe there was construction going on outside the hotel…or someone had ridden a Harley into his suite. At any rate, sleep was apparently off the table.

He frowned at the feel of rough fabric under his cheek. He'd thought he made it to the bed last night, but maybe he'd fallen asleep on the floor. Without opening his eyes, he reached out to touch whatever he was sleeping on.

_Huh. A couch._

But he thought the couch in his suite was leather…white leather, if he recalled correctly.

Fighting the pain throbbing in his skull, Edward opened his bleary eyes slowly, blinking them to focus on his surroundings. He stared unseeingly for a moment, unable to rationalize the vision before him.

He wasn't in his hotel room. He was in a house…a living room. He scanned the room slowly, taking in the overfilled bookshelf…the large-screen TV in the corner partially blocked by the Christmas tree…the two matching arm chairs positioned across a low coffee table from the couch where he was lying.

Where in the world was he?

"Morning," a raspy voice said on a yawn as the owner of the voice walked across the room in front of him. "I made some coffee if you want some."

Edward sat up slowly, squinting at the man talking to him. "Jasper? Jasper Hale?"

He hadn't seen Jasper since he'd left Seattle…barely spoken to him since then. And he was in his living room?

"What are you doing here?" Edward asked in shock.

Jasper laughed, taking a sip of his coffee. "It's my house, asshole. How much did you have to drink last night, anyway?"

Before Edward could answer, a bouncing blur swept through the room toward Jasper.

"Merry Christmas, sexy," the blur said once she'd stilled, planting a kiss on Jasper's waiting lips.

"Alice?" Edward said, finally realizing he must be in some crazy dream. A dream where his former best friend and his sister were apparently involved. And he slept on their couch.

Alice ignored him, easily jumping into Jasper's arms and wrapping her legs around his waist. Jasper caught her with one arm, not even spilling his coffee, and returned her increasingly passionate kisses.

"Ugh. I don't need to see that," Edward complained, clenching his eyes shut at the sight of his sister, dressed only in a t-shirt and underwear, mauling a guy right in front of him.

Without missing a beat, Alice said over her shoulder. "Then go home, Edward. That's where you should be anyway. It's Christmas." She slid down Jasper's body, kissing him once more before turning to her brother. "Did you even call Bella last night and let her know where you were?"

Edward blinked at her. "Bella?"

Alice rolled her eyes. "You didn't, did you? Well, lucky for you I did, otherwise she would have the police out looking for you. You're lucky we even let you in last night after Bella tossed your ass out."

Edward's head was swimming. "She tossed me out?"

Alice leaned in, sniffing him slightly. "God, you smell like a brewery. You really don't remember last night?" At Edward's blank look, she continued, "The Christmas party? Getting drunk off your ass and going home? Bella telling you to get your act together or not bother coming back?" Alice shook her head in a mix of pity and frustration. "Seriously, Edward, when are you going to get it through that thick head of yours that Bella's the best thing that ever happened to you?"

Edward couldn't argue that point. "I know," he said quietly.

"Well then act like it!" she exclaimed, slapping him on the back of the head and causing the relentless pounding to intensify. He heard Jasper chuckle.

"Go home, Edward," Alice said on a sigh. "We'll see you back here at six for dinner, right?"

Edward hesitated, but decided that in a dream it was usually best to play along. "Six. Right."

"Okay." Alice leaned in and kissed his cheek. "And take a shower, for God's sake."

The next thing he knew, he'd been all but shoved out the door. He turned to the long gravel driveway, huddled in his jacket, and wondered what to do next. Then he was hit by something strange.

No snow.

It had been snowing the night before. Snowing hard. But in the gray light of dawn, a light drizzle fell from the sky and water dripped from the eaves on the house, and the trees around him. Edward pulled his hand from his coat pocket, finally realizing he was holding something. Uncurling his fingers, he recognized the little bell that Michael had given him the night before.

Shoving it into his pants pocket, he also noticed he was not wearing the clothes he'd gone to sleep in. Instead, he was dressed in a pair of dark jeans and boots, a blue button-down over a white thermal, and a heavy denim jacket.

What a weird dream. Alice and Jasper were together. He and Bella were apparently together, although having some issues. And evidently, he was some kind of lumberjack.

Or an Eddie Bauer model.

Or maybe just a denim addict.

Edward sighed and stepped off the front porch, walking down the little path to the driveway where two small cars and an SUV were parked. He turned back to the little A-frame, trying to determine if he recognized it.

He didn't.

He looked down the driveway toward the street, wondering where he was supposed to go. On a hunch, he searched his pockets, letting out a victorious chuckle when he found a cell phone and a set of keys. He pressed the button on a key fob and was rewarded by the sound of a door unlocking. He approached the little sedan parked next to the SUV and opened the driver's side door.

Edward looked over the little black car. It was a Honda Civic…early 90s, he guessed, with a creased rear quarter panel streaked with a bit of yellow paint. He wondered what he'd hit. With a heavy sigh he folded his tall frame into the driver's seat and tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, again wondering what to do next.

Where to go?

Normally, in a dream, it was pretty obvious what to do. Actually, now that he thought about it, normally, things just kind of happened around you and you went along for the ride. The quiet around him was strange. There was nobody else around, and the only sound was the dripping rain and his own breathing. Once again he looked around, still unsure of where he was.

It sure didn't look like New York.

Smoke curled from the chimney of Jasper's little house, twisting through the towering pines and cedars to the gray skies overhead. No, it didn't look like New York at all. It almost looked like…

Edward reached into his back pocket and pulled out a worn leather wallet. He flipped it open, absently noting a handful of credit cards and about twenty bucks in cash. He examined the driver's license behind a sheet of clear plastic.

_Forks._

Forks, Washington. His hometown…a town he hadn't been back to a handful of times since he'd left for New York.

Edward could only assume that seeing Bella the night before had sparked the rather strange dream he was having. He found himself unwilling to wake up, however. At least, not until he'd seen Bella.

He concentrated, wondering if he could make it that far. Usually, it wasn't long after you realized you were dreaming that you were already half-awake. Studying the address on his driver's license, he decided he might as well try.

He started the little car, or at least tried to. It took three attempts before the engine finally caught and he pulled out of Jasper's driveway. Once he made it to the main road, things started to look familiar. He realized that Jasper had built his house on a piece of land they all used to hang out on when they were in high school. If Edward recalled correctly, there was a swimming hole about a hundred feet beyond Jasper's house. They'd had a lot of fun at that pond over the years.

Edward found himself smiling as he made his way through downtown Forks. It hadn't changed much, not that he'd expected it would. It made sense that it would look as he remembered it. He turned down Calawah Way, past the mobile home park where Emmett McCarty used to live, then up Trillium Avenue and onto Mayberry Street, searching the houses for the right number.

He pulled up in front of a white two-story house, with blue trim and a black door. A Big Wheel lay overturned in the driveway next to a gray mini-van, and the front lawn was thick, evidencing the weeks of rainy weather. Edward climbed out of the car, surprised to find his stomach in knots.

It's only a dream. He told himself over and over, like a mantra. Still, he was inexplicably nervous.

He fiddled with the keys in his hand, wondering if he should knock or just walk in. He ended up not having to decide, however, because just as he stepped up onto the front porch, the door was thrown open and he was hit in the chest with a heavy duffle bag.

Edward staggered slightly, catching the bag before it landed on the wet ground. Before he could fully recover, another smaller bag hit him in the head.

"Oh shit!" He stumbled back off the porch and lost his balance, landing on his butt with a grunt as both bags slammed into his stomach. He looked up into a familiar face glaring down at him like an avenging angel.

"Rosalie?" Edward's voice cracked in surprise at the appearance of Jasper's younger sister. "What the hell is going on?"

"What's going on?" she hissed. "Seriously, Edward, do you even have to ask? Bella called me last night in tears after the shit you pulled and you expected to come back here and all would be forgiven? Not this time, asshole."

Edward managed to get to his feet. "Where's Bella?"

"She doesn't want to see you."

A chill ran over his skin at the thought. "Rosalie. I want to talk to her."

"Tough shit," she retorted. "She had a feeling you'd stop by and I was more than happy to stick around to make sure you got your stuff." She waved at hand at the bags. "Feel free to take them over to Jasper's or wherever you're staying, because she doesn't want you here."

"Rose, it's Christmas." It was lame, but the only argument he could think of. He really had no idea what was going on, after all…and, dream or no dream, he wanted to see Bella.

Rosalie Hale was not one to succumb to pity, however. "You should have thought of that before you took off – on fucking Christmas Eve, Edward – and acted like a drunk asshole. You know it's not just about last night. She's tired of it all, Edward. She's tired of you."

With that, Rosalie walked back into the house and slammed the door, leaving Edward standing stunned at the bottom of the porch stairs.

A sickening feeling twisted in his stomach as he realized a few things. First, he hurt. His ass was sore and his hand was bleeding where he scraped it on the walkway trying to catch his fall. Second, the rain was falling harder and he was starting to shiver, his clothes cold and wet and his hair dripping into his eyes.

Which led him to a conclusion that was illogical…impossible…but twitching at the edge of his consciousness. One he didn't even want to consider.

Edward closed his eyes, willing himself to awaken. He'd done it hundreds of times in the past when a nightmare got too frightening. All he had to do was concentrate and he'd open his eyes and be back in his own bed, this bizarre experience melting away into barely recognizable glimpses.

_Just a few more minutes._

He waited.

The rain fell harder, thunder clapped, and he saw lightning flash through his closed eyelids.

_Little while longer._

_Any time now._

"Edward?" A quiet voice forced his eyes open. He inhaled sharply as her face came into view.

Bella.

"Why are you standing in the rain?" she asked, her arms clutched across her stomach defensively as she stood in the open doorway. "I thought you left."

Edward stared at her in silence for a moment, unable to find words. She was dressed in a pair of faded jeans and t-shirt under a red plaid flannel shirt with the arms rolled up. He wondered if it was one of his.

He found he liked that idea.

She took in the wet bags lying on the ground and Edward's soaked clothes and sighed slightly. "I'm sorry about Rose," she said finally. "You know how protective she is, and after last night…" Her voice drifted off as she looked away, brushing at her cheeks. Edward's heart sank as he realized she was crying.

"Bella…I'm sorry."

She shrugged, looking into the distance again. "I know, Edward. You're always sorry. That's the problem, isn't it?" She stepped back from the door. "You might as well come in and get dried off. We can talk about this later. I know the kids would love to see you."

Edward's step faltered as he moved forward.

_Kids?_

________

___

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_

**A/N: **I know it's kind of sad right now, but I promise, things will look up eventually. Thanks for reading and for all your kind reviews. Next update will be tomorrow...if not sooner.


	4. Chapter 4 Tiny Tots with Their Eyes All

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:** I know it's confusing at the moment…Edward's confused as well. All will become clearer soon.

* * *

**Chapter 4 – Tiny Tots with Their Eyes All Aglow**

Edward swallowed thickly as he scooped up the bags and walked into the house. He noticed that Bella stepped back as he approached, obviously not wanting to touch him. Edward hesitated in the entryway, unsure of where to go.

"Go upstairs and get a shower," Bella told him quietly. "The kids fell asleep in the other room, so you have a little while." She looked at him sadly for a moment, before walking away and into what he could see was a kitchen in the back of the house. Rosalie was leaning against the counter glaring at him, and he turned away quickly, climbing the stairs.

He walked down a hallway, peeking into rooms as he passed them. The first one was painted pale blue with clouds across the ceiling and a low bed with a dark blue quilt in the corner. A few toy cars were scattered across a colorful rug in the middle of the floor and a huge stuffed panda huddled under a window on the other side of the room. The next was obviously a little girl's room, featuring pale pink and yellow-striped walls and a white bed with a mound of stuffed animals covering the pillows. A small Jack-and-Jill bathroom stood between the two rooms, decorated in bright colors with tropical fish accents.

Across the hall he found the master bedroom, decorated in pale sand and dark brown, with accents of deep red. Edward slipped off his shoes, padding quietly into the room and taking in the homey feel. The furniture was aged wood, gleaming and obviously polished regularly. He reached out to touch the huge pile of pillows on the bed, his fingers trailing over the country-style quilt in shades of red and brown. It wasn't his taste, typically, but something about the room, and the bed, made him feel comfortable. He smiled at a picture of him and Bella on one of the bedside tables, Bella laughing as he nuzzled her neck. The obvious joy in the photograph filled him with a pang of longing. Next to it was a picture of two small children – a little boy holding a baby girl in his arms and grinning widely. Edward found himself grinning in response, the boy's big brown eyes and toothy smile a mirror image of Bella's.

Edward shivered slightly, and decided he needed to get out of his wet clothes. He was cold.

He was _cold._ The impossible thought he'd been trying not to think reared its ugly head yet again.

Shaking it off, Edward stripped off his wet clothes and winced as the wet cloth brushed against his scraped hand. He gathered up the soggy mess, taking it into the bathroom and setting it on the counter as he started the shower. He ducked his head under the hot water, letting it seep into his chilled bones, and tried to relax, again willing himself to wake up. There was no sense sticking around in the dream if Bella was so pissed at him, after all. Edward breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of the coconut body wash and shampoo he'd found in the shower.

When the water ran cold, he gave up on waking up, the sense of foreboding inching through his now warm body. He dried off, and dug in the bags for some dry clothes, settling on another flannel shirt and jeans. Running a hand through his still-damp hair, he emerged from the bedroom, walking quietly down the steps in search of Bella.

He found her curled up on a worn brown couch next to a brightly-lit Christmas tree and the remnants of a wild Christmas morning. Fortunately, Rosalie the guard dog was nowhere to be found. Toys and shredded gift wrap littered the floor and Edward stood in the doorway, nervously tucking his hands in his jean pockets. Bella's sad eyes turned toward him just as a pile of paper on the floor shot up in all directions.

"Daddy!" a little boy plowed through the mess and wrapped himself around Edward's leg. "Where were you? You missed Christmas!" A gap in the boy's front teeth colored his words with a slight lisp, so it took Edward a moment to interpret what he'd said. He patted the boy awkwardly on the back.

"Uh…yeah…sorry about that," he said. "I…uh…had to go see…Aunt Alice?" Edward glommed on to the first excuse he could think of.

"Auntie Alice?" the boy repeated. An excited grin split his face, then just as quickly morphed into a pout. "How come you didn't take me?" He released Edward's leg, crossing his arms over his chest with a huff.

"Uh…" Edward's eyes flew to Bella, but she just raised an eyebrow in response. Edward lowered to a knee and reached tentatively toward the little boy. "I'm sorry…buddy. But you had to be here to see what Santa brought, right?"

The boy's face lit up. "I got a fire truck!" he exclaimed, his irritation instantly forgotten. "And a new bike!" He swept through the crumpled paper to where a shiny two-wheeler stood beneath the tree. "Mommy said I had to wait until it stopped raining to ride it, though. Is it still raining?" He rushed to the window and peered out. "It's just a little." He turned to Bella. "It's just a little raining, Mommy. Can I ride my bike now?"

Bella's lips quirked. "You have to get dressed first," she pointed out, "and wear your helmet."

The boy crossed his arms again in what Edward was quickly learning was a familiar gesture. "I don't wanna wear my helmet!"

"Masen, we've talked about this," Bella said in that warning voice common to moms around the world.

"Mo-oooommmm! It makes my head itch!" he whined.

At that moment, a mumbled cry came from the other corner of the room. Edward turned and saw a little portable crib set up near the end of the couch.

"Edward, could you help me out here, please?" Bella moved past him to the crib, lifting a toddler to her shoulder and patting her back gently. Edward turned to face Masen, whose temper tantrum was escalating to epic proportions. His red face scrunched up as he inhaled deeply and Edward was sure he was about to let out a piercing scream.

At that moment, the little girl Bella was holding began to cry, evidently feeling the tension around her. Bella cooed to her before turning back to her son. "Masen. No helmet. No bike," she said firmly, and the scream Edward dreaded filled the room.

"Edward?" Bella turned to him in annoyance.

"Daaaa-dddyyyyy!" Masen cried, collapsing on the floor in heaving sobs. The little girl's cries escalated as Edward's stunned gaze took in the scene around him. The faces turned to him in expectation, waiting for him to deal with the situation…for him to be _Dad_.

It was too much. Edward felt his heart rate accelerate as his palms grew sweaty and his head swam. He began to back out of the room, away from the insanity.

It wasn't real.

_It wasn't real._

But somehow, way deep down inside, Edward knew he was wrong. Somehow…somehow it _was_ real. And with that thought, he panicked and did the only thing he could think of.

He ran.

He headed for the front door, but then remembered something that Michael had said to him the night before. He couldn't get past the feeling that the strange man had something to do with all of this, and if he was right, and this _was_ real, Michael was the only one who could help him. He turned and ran up the stairs to the master bedroom, the cries and screams in the other room fading slightly as he made it to the second floor.

Edward stumbled into the bathroom, grabbing his pile of wet clothes and searching the pockets.

"Where is it?" he mumbled to himself, just before his hands closed on the little metal bell. He pulled it out of his pocket gingerly, his eyes narrowed on it in suspicion. It looked like a normal jingle bell – the kind you'd see everywhere at this time of year. Carefully, he grasped it by the tiny loop on the top and shook it, the tinkle echoing off the shower tiles. Without realizing it, he'd clenched his eyes shut as he rang the bell, and he slowly opened them, waiting for whatever was supposed to happen.

Nothing.

Edward stood, throwing the bell onto the counter. "Figures," he mumbled as he walked back into the bedroom. He came to an abrupt halt at the sight of Michael standing next to the bed.

"Hello, Edward."

"You!" Edward growled, taking a step toward him and tightening his fists in an effort to control himself. "What have you done to me?"

"Only what you asked for," Michael said brightly, plopping onto the edge of the bed and hugging a pillow to his chest.

"What…did you drug me or something?" Edward asked. "Hypnotize me?" He thought for a moment. "You put something in my drink last night, didn't you?"

Michael laughed and stretched out on his side, propping his head on his hand. "No, Edward. Nothing like that. You asked for this. Don't you remember? The one thing in your past you'd change if you could – you wouldn't have chickened out ten years ago and you would have asked Bella to marry you."

"I never told you that. How did you know that?"

Michael just smiled. "I have an unusual…insight into people," he said. "Well, Edward, you got your wish. You proposed on Christmas Eve and you got married six months later. You have two children, a house, two cars…the American dream."

Edward glared at him. "This isn't real."

"It's as real as you want it to be."

"It's a dream."

"You know it's not, Edward."

Edward was silent for a moment, then said quietly, "Bella hates me."

Michael shrugged. "Nobody's perfect."

Edward rolled his eyes. "I don't want this. I mean…I want Bella, but not like this. We're supposed to be _happy_."

Michael got up off the bed. "It was one choice…one _change_…and this is the result," he said. "You wanted to correct the mistake of not asking Bella to marry you ten years ago and you have. What you do now is up to you." Michael tilted his head as if listening to something. "I've gotta run," he said.

"No, wait," Edward exclaimed. "You have to get me out of here."

"No can do, Edward," Michael said with a grin, straightening his pristine white sweater. "You asked for this, now you've got to see it through." He moved toward the window.

"You mean I'm stuck here…forever?" Edward exclaimed as panicked frustration swept through him. "What about my job? I'm supposed to start my new segment next week! And what the hell are we doing in Forks? What about Bella's books?"

"Keep track of the bell, Edward. Only use it for emergencies…you only have two left," Michael warned.

A little voice drew Edward's attention to the doorway. "Daddy?" Masen hiccupped slightly, his face still red with the remnants of his tantrum. "Who are you talking to?"

Edward turned back to the window, but Michael was gone. "What the…" he murmured, hurrying to the window and pushing it open. He stuck his head out, but there was no sign that anyone had been there.

"Daddy?" Masen walked toward him, the feet on his pajamas flopping on the carpet. "I'm sorry I made you mad." His downcast eyes tore at Edward's heart and he found himself falling to his knees in front of the little boy.

"It's okay, Masen," he said gently, lifting a hand to rub his son's head. "I'm not mad at you. I just…got a little scared, you know?"

Masen looked up in confusion. "Scared 'a what? You're a daddy. You're not supposed to be scared of anything." His lisp became more prominent with all of the S's in his sentence and it made Edward smile.

"Oh, daddies get scared too, sometimes," he said. "So, are you feeling better?" To his surprise, Masen reached up to him, forcing Edward to sit on the floor so he could climb into his lap.

"Yeah. I'm fine," he said, sniffling slightly. "Mommy said I needed to have a time out."

Edward smirked. "Are you supposed to be in your room right now?"

Masen just shrugged.

"I'll tell you what," Edward said conspiratorially. "I won't say anything if you promise to wear your helmet when you ride your new bike."

Masen sighed heavily. "Okay," he agreed, drawing out the word so Edward knew it was a huge concession.

Seeing the opportunity to find out a little about the world he now found himself in, Edward decided to prod the child for some information.

"Say, Masen, you want to play a game?"

Masen looked up, his face brightening. "What kind of game?"

"Ummm…it's kind of a pretend game."

"Like Aliens and Space Rangers?" It took Edward a moment to decipher "_Alienth and Thpace Rangerth."_

He laughed. "Kind of. I'll give you clues and you have to guess the answer."

"Okay."

"Ready?"

"Yes, Daddy."

Edward pretended to think really hard. "Okay…she's a little girl and lives in our house."

Masen shook his head pityingly. "That's too easy. It's my sister."

"You have to say her name."

"Makenna." Masen rolled his eyes, already tiring of the game.

"Makenna," Edward repeated quietly, wondering how he and Bella had decided on that name. Masen was easy – it was a family name. But Makenna? He couldn't think of a connection to that name…not that he didn't like it, because he did.

"Daddy? Are we still playing?" Masen played with the zipper on his pajamas, obviously getting bored.

"Okay," Edward said with a smile. "This is the place where I work."

"Ummm…." Masen's eyes scrunched up as he thought. "It's the paper place."

"The paper place?" Edward considered that for a moment. "You mean I work at a paper?"

Masen nodded. "The paper place."

Edward was relieved he was still a journalist of some sort, but wondered which newspaper he worked at. It seemed a long commute to work for the _Seattle Times_, but he supposed he could be some sort of columnist.

"What about Mommy?" he asked.

"What about Mommy?" Masen repeated, his brow creased in confusion.

"Where does Mommy work?"

Masen rolled his eyes. "Mommy works at my school."

"Your school? Doing what?"

"Daddy, I don't like this game," Masen said in reply. "It's not fun at all. Can we play Old Maid instead?"

Edward smiled at the boy. It was difficult not to be enchanted by him. He was like a miniature Bella with his dark hair and eyes and his quick smile. Edward could tell that he was smart as well…also something he credited to Bella.

Edward made a show of looking toward the window. "Old Maid?" he said. "I was thinking since it's stopped raining we'd take that bike for a spin."

"Yay!" Masen squealed, jumping to his feet and running into the hall. "I'll get my helmet!"

* * *

**A/N: **My original goal was to have the story complete by Christmas, but I didn't quite make it. It should all be posted by New Year's, though. Next update tomorrow.


	5. Chapter 5 I'll Be Home for Christmas

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:** Thank you all for the wonderful reviews for this little story – although I suck at replying, please be assured I do read and appreciate every one! Many of you are drawing comparisons to It's a Wonderful Life or The Family Man, and I have to say yes... you're on the right track.

As for how long this story will be – should be around 20 chapters or so.

* * *

**Chapter 5 – I'll be Home for Christmas**

"Okay, remember I'm right here."

"I know, Daddy."

"Don't be scared."

"I'm not."

"Okay, push off and go, buddy."

Masen grunted as he pushed the pedal down, his bike wobbling as he began to roll down the sidewalk. "Daddy!"

"It's okay," Edward encouraged him, his hands on either sides of the bike seat – not touching, but close enough to grab it if he started to fall. "You're doing great, keep pedaling."

The wobbling lessened as Masen pedaled faster. "I'm doing it!"

"Keep going!"

Masen sped down the sidewalk and Edward began to run to keep up with him. "You're doing great!"

"Daddy!" he yelled in a worried voice, just before the bike tipped over and Masen fell onto the hard concrete.

"Masen!" Edward ran up to him, dropping to his knees and pulling the bike off the little boy as his stomach clenched in fear. "Are you okay?"

To his surprise, Masen jumped to his feet. "Did you see? I did it! I went so fast!" He bounced up and down. "I want to go again."

Edward laughed and turned the bike around. "Okay. Next time, just remember you have to put your foot down when you stop."

He took off again confidently, the bike moving smoothly down the sidewalk as Edward ran alongside him. This time, when he reached their front yard, he hit the brakes and put his foot down on the ground with a huge grin on his face.

Caught up in the moment, Edward swept the little boy up into his arms, spinning him around as the bike clattered forgotten to the sidewalk. Masen squealed and Edward couldn't hold back a laugh.

"Daddy, I'm dizzy," Masen shrieked.

Edward gently placed his son back on his feet, not releasing him until he regained his balance. Over Masen's shoulder he caught a flash of movement in the living room window. Bella was standing there, rocking Makenna on her hip with a soft smile on her face as she watched them. The smile fell slightly when she met Edward's eyes.

Right then Edward made a decision. Dream or not, he was going to make things right with Bella.

Because – dream or not – he was still in love with her.

~0~

The rest of the day passed peacefully, if not comfortably. Bella avoided talking to him – even being in the same room with him – but had yet to ask him to leave.

Edward took that as a good sign.

At Masen's insistence, Edward opened his Christmas gifts. More flannel from Bella – big surprise. Edward wondered when he'd become so fond of dressing like the Brawny paper towel guy. He smiled and thanked her, though, and was suitably impressed by the little wooden tool box Masen had painted blue and yellow for him.

Once the gifts were opened, Bella put Makenna down for a nap and sent Masen to take his new toys to his room. Edward sat awkwardly for a moment, then stood to start picking up the torn gift wrap and bows off the floor. He crumpled a wad into a tight ball, and was wondering what to do with it when Bella appeared with a huge garbage bag.

"Here." She held it out to him and he deposited his bundle inside before taking it from her.

They worked in silence for a while, clearing the aftermath of Hurricane Masen, when Edward heard Bella release a heavy sigh. Edward watched her out of the corner of his eye. She looked tired and worn, and – God help him – so incredibly beautiful.

"This doesn't fix anything," she finally said quietly. "I don't want to ruin Christmas for Masen, so we'll go to dinner at Jasper and Alice's and spend time with our families, but tomorrow, we need to settle a few things."

"Okay."

"I mean it, Edward," she said firmly. "I'm not going to just give in this time. Something needs to change, or…"

Edward swallowed thickly. "Or…?" he finally prodded hesitantly.

"Or we're through." Her words were quiet, barely a whisper, but they cut through Edward's heart.

"I'll do whatever it takes," he told her.

"I've heard that before."

"But I really mean it this time."

Bella laughed humorlessly. "I've heard that before too."

Edward thrust the last of the paper into the garbage bag, tying it tightly and letting it drop to the floor as he ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know what to say, Bella. I don't want to lose you."

_Before I even had you, _he added silently.

"Edward you haven't had me…we haven't had _each other_…for a long time," she said sadly. "I don't know. Maybe it's time to just let it go."

"That's not what I want."

Bella eyed him levelly. "It's not all about you, Edward."

"Mommy?" Masen appeared at the doorway, rubbing his eyes sleepily. "I'm hungry."

Without meeting Edward's eyes again, Bella moved toward her son. "How about a sandwich?" she suggested. "Then I think it's time for a rest before we go to Auntie Alice's."

"But I'm not tired!"

"Masen," Bella's warning tone made Edward smile as the two made their way to the kitchen, their voices still carrying to him through the quiet house.

"Okay," Masen agreed grumpily, "but can I have peanut butter and jelly?"

"Okay."

~0~

The tension continued through the afternoon, although – true to her word – Bella didn't bring up their problems again and instead put on a smiling face. While Masen and Makenna napped, she cleaned the kitchen, although Edward thought it was more out of a desire to avoid him than anything else. The kitchen was spotless.

Edward took the opportunity to roam the house, flipping through photo albums and peeking into drawers. He knew that it was technically his house, but he still felt like he was snooping uninvited. What he found seemed to pose more questions than answers, however. He found his college diploma, as well as Bella's…but no sign of the Master's degree he knew she was pursuing. And when he came across a shelf in their apparently shared office covered with "World's Greatest Teacher" mugs and miniature trophies, he realized Bella must have become a teacher instead of an author.

He wondered what led to that decision.

He wondered also how he ended up working at the _Forks Weekly_, a newspaper he'd never heard of. He came across a stack of the papers, as well as some business cards in a desk drawer. Evidently he was Editor-in-Chief.

"We need to be at Alice's in an hour," Bella said from the office doorway. Edward jumped guiltily, but quelled his panic when he realized Bella was not surprised or irritated by his presence in the room. It was his office, after all.

"Okay."

"I'll get the kids up and ready, and if you could keep them entertained while I shower?" she asked tentatively, as if she was used to him protesting such a request.

Edward just shrugged. "Sure. No problem."

"I ironed your blue shirt. It's on the bed if you want to change."

Edward blinked, unused to having such things done for him. "Thanks," he said finally. "I appreciate it."

Bella just nodded slightly in acknowledgement and left.

Edward made his way to the bedroom and dressed quickly before heading down the hall toward Masen's room. He fought a chuckle at the sight that greeted him. A very obviously excited Masen was jumping on the bed while Bella tried to pull a striped sweater over his head.

"Daddy!" he exclaimed when he spotted Edward in the doorway. "We're going to Auntie Alice's!"

Edward grinned. "I know, buddy. But we can't go if you don't let Mommy help you get dressed."

"But I'm so 'cited! My body doesn't want to stop jumpin'!" he argued, punctuating every word with another jump on the squeaking mattress.

Edward walked into the room, scooping the giggling boy up before sitting on the bed and plopping him down on his lap. "Just try for a second," Edward said. "We'll count to five and I'll bet Mommy's done. One…."

Masen smiled at the game. "Two…"

Bella pulled the sweater over Masen's head. "Three…"

One arm through, then the other… "Four…"

Bella quickly pulled a pair of shoes onto Masen's feet, working quickly to tie them. "Four and a half…" Edward said, drawing the words out slowly.

Bella finished tying the shoes, and kissed Masen's cheek with a loud smack. "Five!"

"Done!" Masen wiggled from Edward's lap, running from the room. "Time to go!"

Bella sat back on her heels, pushing her hair out of her face. "Thanks," she said. "Could you get Makenna? She's in her room, ready to go. I'm just going to grab a quick shower."

Edward felt a stab of apprehension at the thought of caring for Makenna. He had very little experience with children in general, let alone little girls. But he hid his fear and smiled instead. "Sure. No problem."

"I'll be ready in twenty," Bella said, looking away abruptly and walking down the hall to their bedroom.

Edward approached Makenna's room slowly, trying not to panic as the pink and yellow stripes surrounded him with the unfamiliar essence of femininity. The little girl sat in the middle of the floor, cradling a baby doll and cooing quietly. Edward took a moment to study her. In the shadow of Masen's enthusiasm, he hadn't really had an opportunity to do so until that moment.

Her hair was a wild mess on her head, with tones of red and bronze shimmering in the subtle lamplight. Edward smiled ruefully at the knowledge that she'd probably fight the cowlicks for the rest of her life, and hoped she wouldn't curse her father for the genes that condemned her to such a fate. He smiled softly as she sang to the doll, a tuneless melody with words he couldn't decipher. Eventually, she realized she was being watched, and her gaze lifted to meet Edward's.

"Hi Daddy," she whispered quietly, evidently trying not to wake the baby.

It was a moment before Edward could reply, because when her big eyes met his, he lost his breath. It was like looking into a mirror. The luminous green eyes with flecks of gold staring back at him were his own. It was unsettling…overwhelming…yet at the same time he was filled with a pride and possessiveness that nearly knocked him over.

His child. _His daughter._

Was it possible to fall in love with someone so quickly?

He stepped toward her tentatively, dropping into a crouch on the rug. "Hi Makenna." Unable to resist, he reached out to touch a wayward strand of her hair. "What are you doing?"

"Taking care of Baby. She's sleepy," she whispered.

"Is she coming to Aunt Alice's with us?"

Makenna nodded solemnly. "'Course. She always comes with me."

Edward smiled. "Well, can we go downstairs? As soon as Mommy's ready, we need to get going."

"'Kay, Daddy." She handed him the doll unceremoniously as she got to her feet. Edward held it awkwardly by one arm.

"Daddy!" she chided. "You have to hold her gently!" She reached out to wrap his arms around the plastic doll.

"Is that right?" Edward asked, still a little awed by the pretty child. He adjusted his hold. "Is that better?"

Makenna nodded, taking Edward's pant leg and tugging him from the room. "Do you think Auntie Alice will have cookies?"

"Ummm…maybe."

"Peanut butter? They're my favorite."

"Mine too!"

Makenna looked at him suspiciously. "I know that, Daddy."

Edward grinned. "Of course you do."

They walked downstairs, only to find Masen running wildly from one room to another, his arms spread wide as he made airplane noises.

"I'm gonna fly to Auntie Alice's!" he yelled from the kitchen.

"Maybe we should take the car instead," Edward suggested.

"Nope. Flying's faster."

"You can't fly, Masen," Makenna said, her tone much older than her little body as she propped her fists on her hips. "You don't have wings."

Masen came to stop in front of her. "Can so."

"Can not."

"Can so!"

"Can not!" she screamed.

"Whoa! Wait a second." Edward tried to intervene, scrambling for a way to defuse the situation. Two pairs of eyes turned to him, apparently waiting for him to declare a winner in the little standoff.

Edward had no idea what to do.

Fortunately, he was spared by Bella coming down the stairs, pulling on a long coat as she hurried into the room. "Time to go!" she said cheerfully, successfully diverting the children's attention. "Bundle up if you want to go to Auntie Alice's."

Masen and Makenna cheered, slipping their coats on and waiting patiently as Bella zipped them up. Edward watched the scene with mixed emotions.

On one hand, he felt overwhelmed…a wife…two children…all dependent on him – and from what he'd learned so far, he was failing them.

On the other, the domestic scene filled him with a sense of peace and longing. It was something he hadn't known he wanted, even in the times when he's mourned the loss of Bella in his life with a fervency he didn't know he possessed.

But he did…want it, that is.

As he followed Bella out to the minivan and watched her strap Makenna into her carseat. As Masen sang Jingle Bells at the top of his lungs. As the van backfired before the engine finally caught, and they slowly backed out of the driveway.

As he caught a glimpse of Bella…his _wife_…in the seat next to him.

He wanted this life. Even if it meant he never set foot on foreign soil or appeared on the national news. He wanted this life.

But his heart sank when he made another realization.

He may have wanted it, but he wasn't sure Bella did anymore.

* * *

**A/N: **Happy holidays to you all! Next chapter will be up tomorrow!


	6. Chapter 6  Home for the Holidays

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 6 – Home for the Holidays**

They pulled up in front of Jasper and Alice's house and Edward helped Bella get the kids out of the van, holding Makenna's hand as they made their way to the front door. He noticed several cars in the driveway and wondered who else was going to be at dinner.

"Merry Christmas!" Alice shouted as she threw open the front door, dropping to her knees to wrap Makenna and Masen into a tight hug. "How are my most favoritest niece and nephew in the whole, wide world?" she asked, pulling back to kiss their cheeks.

Masen giggled. "Auntie Alice, we're your only niece and nephew," he pointed out.

"Well, you're still my favorite," she said with another squeeze. She leaned in to stage whisper to Makenna. "Go on into the kitchen. There might be some peanut butter cookies waiting for you in there."

The children cheered and ran off toward the kitchen. Bella called out after them, "Only one until after dinner!" She turned to Alice. "You spoil them, you know," she said, leaning in to hug her sister-in-law.

"Auntie's prerogative," Alice retorted, turning to Edward. "You look better."

Edward smiled slightly. "Feel better."

Alice took a step back from the door. "Well, come on in. Mom and Dad are here…and Charlie's already confiscated the remote," she added with a laugh.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Typical."

"Oh, cut the guy a little slack, Bella," Alice replied, linking her elbow with Bella's. "It's the holidays. Let him have his fun."

Edward trailed behind them, closing the door quietly and shrugging out of his coat. He followed Bella's lead, hanging it in a closet off the living room before they converged on the kitchen. Jasper was stirring something on the stove, a ruffled apron wrapped around his waist. Edward finally noticed that his friend wore a wedding band, as did Alice. He wondered how long they'd been married.

"It smells wonderful in here," Bella said, crossing to kiss Jasper on the cheek. "Anything I can do to help?"

Jasper waved her off. "No, we've got it under control. Go and say hello to Mom and Dad. Rosalie's in there too," he said, casting a warning glance toward Edward. "You might want to steer clear of her."

Edward grimaced. "Yeah, she's not too happy with me." He watched as Alice and Bella headed toward the family room. "She almost didn't let me in the house this morning."

"Well, you can hardly blame her," Jasper pointed out. "It's not the first time, Edward."

Edward sighed heavily at the reminder that he had a pattern of letting Bella down. "It's going to be the last," he said quietly.

Jasper studied him for a moment. "You seem different," he observed. "I can't put my finger on it, but…" He shook his head, adjusting the heat on the stove.

"Anyway, Rose brought her new boyfriend, so she'll be on her best behavior," Jasper said, pulling a masher out of a drawer and starting in on a pot of potatoes.

"Boyfriend?" Edward repeated. "Who's the lucky guy?"

"Emmett McCarty."

Edward choked slightly. "You're kidding."

Jasper grinned. "Nope."

"But…she'll eat him alive!"

Jasper laughed. "I thought so too, but the guy can actually hold his own. And Rose really likes him. It's sickening really…she's putty in his hands."

"Putty? Rosalie?" Edward scoffed.

Jasper added some butter to the potatoes. "You'll have to see it for yourself." He dumped the mashed potatoes into a bowl and placed them in the oven to keep them warm. Edward eyed him carefully.

"Jasper, can I ask you something?"

"Sure," he said distractedly.

"It's going to sound weird," Edward warned.

Jasper's eyes crinkled as he smiled, wiping his hands on a towel as he turned to face his friend. "Shoot."

Edward took a deep breath. "Why didn't Bella finish grad school?"

Jasper looked at him in confusion. "What?"

"Just…humor me, okay?" Edward said in a rush. "Why didn't she finish?"

Jasper replied slowly. "Well, you know, after you got laid off at the _Times_…"

"I got laid off?"

"What's this all about, Edward?" Jasper asked warily.

"Please, Jasper, just tell me."

Jasper stared warily at Edward for a moment. "You were reporting at the _Seattle Times_. Bella had maybe a year left to get her Master's, but you got laid off…budget cuts."

"I never went to New York," Edward murmured, half to himself.

"No," Jasper replied slowly, still confused by the strange conversation. "You turned down the internship before you and Bella got married."

He paused, but Edward just nodded, motioning for him to continue.

"You decided to come back here to start your own weekly paper. Bella already had her teaching certificate because she was subbing to make ends meet. She got a job at Forks Elementary and you started the _Weekly_."

"So she gave up writing?" Edward asked.

"Edward, you know this."

"Please, Jasper…please," he pleaded.

Jasper sighed, evidently worried his best friend had lost his mind. "She published a few short stories and magazine articles, but then she got pregnant with Masen, so she had to give it up," he told him. "Then Makenna came along, and you had to spend so much time at the paper…there just wasn't time for her to get back to it.

Edward's eyes drifted to the doorway as he heard Bella's laughter drift through. "Does she hate me for that?"

Jasper laughed. "Bella doesn't hate you for anything, Edward."

"You could have fooled me."

"Bella loves you," Jasper said emphatically, drawing Edward's attention back. "But a girl can only put up with so much."

"What have I done?" he asked. At first, Jasper thought he was talking to himself, but Edward turned pleading eyes toward him. "Tell me, Jasper. What did I do to her? Did I…Did I cheat on her?" He couldn't imagine doing such a thing, but given Bella's feelings, he had to ask the question.

Jasper gaped at him for a moment. "No! Well, at least not with a woman."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"There are lots of ways to cheat, Edward," he pointed out. "Every time you put your job before your family…every time you let your resentment about New York show…every time you lashed out at her because life didn't go exactly the way you planned…"

Edward held up a hand. "I get the idea."

Jasper turned off a burner and they stood in silence for a moment. "Are you going to tell me what this is all about?" he asked.

Edward rubbed his hands over his face. "I'm not exactly sure," he admitted. "I just know that I have to make things right. I…I need her, Jasper."

"You got that right," he chuckled.

"So what do I do? How do I fix this?"

Jasper smiled sadly at his friend. "I don't have any great words of wisdom, man," he said. "I'm afraid that's one you're going to have to figure out on your own."

Edward nodded. He was beginning to believe the very same thing.

"Here, take this," Jasper said, handing Edward a bowl of rolls. "It's time to eat."

Edward helped Jasper carry the food to the dining room table, but was distracted by a familiar voice in the other room. He set down the bowl and walked into the family room.

"Edward!" His mother, Esme, crossed the room, enveloping him in a tight hug. "Merry Christmas!"

To Edward's surprise, he had to swallow a lump in his throat. How long had it been since he'd hugged his mother? A year? It was before the assignment in Afghanistan. God, that was almost two years.

"Merry Christmas, Mom," he finally managed to get out before turning to hug his father. He smiled at the familiar scent of pipe smoke and his father's aftershave. "Good to see you, Dad."

"You too, son," Carlisle Cullen pulled back to pat his shoulder. "How's everything at the paper?"

"Ummm…good…good, I think," Edward stammered.

"I saw the expose on the local nursing home," he said with a proud smile. "That was some great work."

Edward smiled. He could always count on his parents to be proud of him, no matter what he did. "Thanks. Uh…Jasper said it's time to eat," he announced, trying to divert the attention away from himself. He was acutely aware of Bella watching from the other side of the room where she stood next to Rosalie and the huge hulk of a man that was Emmett McCarty. Edward remembered him as a star on the Forks High football team, and thought he'd heard he got a scholarship to UCLA.

"Hey Emmett," he said, extending his hand. "Good to see you again."

Emmett shook his hand with a bellowing laugh and slapped his back heartily. "You say that like we don't see each other every day, Dude!"

"Oh." Edward laughed nervously, trying to cover his blunder. "Well, it's still good to see you…as…you know…kind of a member of the family." He eyed Rosalie significantly and Emmett laughed again. To his surprise, Rosalie didn't glare at him. In fact, she didn't seem to notice him at all. Her rather dreamy gaze was focused only on Emmett.

"Well, thanks man," Emmett replied with a grin. "Now, let's get our chow on. I'm starving!" He tugged Rosalie under his arm, pressing an absent kiss to the top of her head as the group moved into the dining room. Rosalie all but glowed under Emmett's attentions, and Edward fought not to laugh out loud.

It appeared the tigress had been tamed.

Dinner was a loud affair. Edward, for the most part, was an observer. He listened closely, and learned a lot. Like Emmett was a mechanic and owned his own garage only about a block from where Edward worked. His father was still at the hospital – chief of staff – and doing a little teaching as well. His mother did volunteer work with the local senior center, as well as working with local foster families. Charlie Swan was stoic as ever, speaking only occasionally to ask someone to pass the potatoes. His eyes softened when they lit on his grandchildren, however, and Edward could tell they were crazy about him as well. Edward still wasn't completely certain what Jasper and Alice did – some kind of online business having to do with art – but they seemed to be doing well.

Edward absorbed the energy at the table, eating quietly and only interjecting when a question was addressed to him directly. He found himself laughing along with the others, however, enjoying the interactions between what was now his family.

It was almost perfect.

Except for the fact that he could feel the tension emanating from Bella where she sat next to him…the slight jerk every time her arm accidentally brushed his. The hurt and pain from her was almost palpable, and he wondered how no one else in the room could feel it.

Or maybe they could. Maybe they, like him, were glossing over it, trying to make the best of an uncomfortable situation…trying to ensure a happy holiday for his children.

As Alice sliced the pumpkin pie, Edward let his eyes drift around the table. He smiled at Alice and Jasper, playfully arguing over how much whipped cream to put on each piece…to Rosalie and Emmett, their heads together, talking in hushed tones as she squeezed his arm…to Charlie, who was having a heated discussion with Masen about whether Batman or Superman was the best superhero. On the other end of the table, his parents were smiling at Makenna as Esme wiped a smear of mashed potatoes off his daughter's chin. Then, of course, there was Bella.

Always Bella.

As his thoughts returned to the strained relationship with the woman who was now his wife, his smile fell.

What was he going to do?

He looked up as Alice offered him a piece of pie, passing it to Bella as his hand trembled slightly. She took it from him, but didn't take a bite.

How could he fix this?

Jasper had told him he'd put other things – _everything_ from what he could tell – before Bella. He supposed that he'd have to dig his way out of this mess the same way he got into it, bit by bit. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye as she poked at her pie.

He'd have to show her that she was important to him…the most important thing to him.

He'd have to win her heart…romance her…seduce her. At that thought, he felt a telltale tightening in his pants and grimaced at his inappropriate reaction.

Obviously, _that_ would have to wait. He couldn't deny the fact that he wanted Bella. He wanted her badly. Even being this close to her was absolute torture…the smell of her hair…the warmth of her body.

But he couldn't screw this up, pardon the pun.

He'd all but lost her, and he'd have to heal the pain in her heart before he could even think about gaining access to her body.

He just prayed it wasn't too late.

* * *

**A/N: **I know a lot of people were wondering what Edward had done that was so bad… and guessing everything from cheating to being an alcoholic… but as Jasper said, it wasn't a single a big thing…and I'd like to add that Edward's not the only one at fault. This story's more about the little things that can get in the way and drive a couple apart when they're not paying attention – and what it takes for them to find their way back to each other again. I promise, they will find their way back eventually - they just have a few things to learn first.

Next update tomorrow if not sooner.


	7. Chapter 7  Put One Foot in Front of the

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: **Thanks so much for all the kind words. Many of you can relate to the "little" things building up over time to become bigger things, and see how they can drive a wedge into a relationship. I'm afraid these two have some hurdles to overcome, and I was actually surprised by some comments that Edward should just give up now and dump Bella. Sorry, but he's not going to. Our Edward has a little more stamina than that! LoL! Also, we still haven't really heard Bella's side, so don't be too hard on her just yet.

* * *

**Chapter 7 – Put One Foot in Front of the Other**

He slept on the couch.

When they'd arrived home after dinner, he'd helped Bella bathe the kids and put them to bed, enjoying the task more than he thought he would. When little Makenna wrapped her arms around his neck and rubbed her nose against his, his heart melted.

"'Night, Daddy," she said.

"'Night, Makenna."

"You've got to say it, Daddy," she said sleepily.

"Say what?"

"Good night, sweet dreams…" she began.

"…my love is in the moonbeams," Edward concluded, remembering the rhyme his mother always recited at bedtime.

"That's right," she said on a yawn. "'Night Daddy."

He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. "'Night," he whispered.

He turned off the light as he left the room and made his way to Masen's bedside. Bella was sitting next to him, running her fingers through his hair.

"Can I ride my bike tomorrow?" he asked.

"If it isn't raining."

"I can ride in the rain."

"We'll see.

Masen frowned. "That means 'No,'"

Bella laughed and kissed his forehead. "That means 'We'll see.' Now go to sleep."

"Okay."

Edward passed her as she left the room and leaned over the little boy. "I'll see you in the morning, buddy."

"Okay."

"Good night, sweet dreams…"

"…my love is in the moonbeams," Masen finished, his eyes already drifting closed as Edward pulled the sheets to his chin and kissed the little boy's head.

He walked out into the hallway, only to see Bella standing in front of their room, her arms crossed over her chest. Edward stopped, his eyes falling to the floor.

"I'll…uh…I'll just sleep downstairs."

Bella replied quietly. "I think that would be best."

"Can we talk tomorrow?"

"Don't you have to work?"

Did he? Edward had absolutely no idea.

"I'll be home by five," he said, a plan forming in his mind. "I want to take you out to a special dinner. I'll ask Alice or my parents to watch the kids." He lifted hopeful eyes to Bella. She stared at him for a moment.

"Are you sure?" she asked tentatively. "You always say going out is a waste of money."

He did? What kind of idiot was he?

"It's a special occasion," he replied. "We need to talk, Bella. I…I don't want to lose you, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes for us to make things work." She began to speak, but he held up a hand to stop her.

"I know I've said this before, and I know actions speak louder than words," he continued. "So let me do this…let me show you, please?"

Bella took a deep breath, and for a moment, he thought she might deny him. Instead, she said one word in a small voice. One word that made hope swell inside him and a wave of relief pass through his body.

"Okay."

He smiled and turned to hop down the stairs, confidence beginning to blossom. He would show Bella the time of her life. It had been a while, but he still remembered how to win a woman over.

She wouldn't know what hit her.

~0~

He woke with a grunt to the feeling of Masen plopping down onto his stomach.

"Morning, Daddy," he said, bouncing slightly. "Did you fall asleep watching TV again?"

Edward winced at the reminder that he'd probably spent more than a few nights on the couch. "Uh…yeah, I guess I did."

"Mommy said it's time to get up!" Masen shouted, sliding back to the floor. "She's making pancakes!"

Edward's stomach growled at the scent of bacon reached his nostrils. "Sounds good," he rasped, sitting up and running his hands through his hair. "Tell her I'll be there in a minute, okay? I need to go get a shower."

"Okay!" Masen said gleefully, running into the kitchen.

Edward got up, stretching his aching muscles and yawning hugely. The night before, his mind raced as he'd planned the big date, and he hadn't managed to fall asleep until long after midnight. He'd tossed and turned after that, partly due to the discomfort of sleeping on the couch…partly, he was sure, due to nerves over whether his plan would work.

He showered and dressed quickly, not wanting Bella to think he didn't appreciate her making breakfast. He scowled at his closet full of denim and flannel, wondering slightly at the absence of suits and ties. There was one dark gray suit, the elbows and knees shiny with age, and Edward decided he'd have to find time during the day to find something to wear for his date. He couldn't take Bella to dinner at Canlis dressed in plaid.

As for how to get a reservation at Canlis on such short notice…well, that was something he was going to have to address once he got to work. There were certain perks that came with working in the media. He hoped they also applied to small weekly newspapers on the Olympic Peninsula.

He slipped on a pair of worn boots and made his way downstairs and into the kitchen. He couldn't hold back a smile at the sight of the two children sitting at the breakfast bar. Masen was rolling his bacon up in his pancakes, dipping the roll into syrup before taking a bite. Makenna, apparently, didn't like syrup, opting to eat her pancakes dry. Bella looked up, handing him a cup of coffee.

"Hungry?" she asked quietly.

"Starving."

"Have a seat."

Edward sat down next to Makenna, a little of the hesitancy from the day before reappearing. "Morning," he said quietly.

Makenna turned her emerald gaze on him briefly. "Morning, Daddy," she said, taking another bite of her pancake.

"Uh…how did you sleep?"

Makenna's brow creased in confusion. "In my bed."

Edward chuckled. "I meant, did you have good dreams?"

"Oh." Makenna shrugged, talking through another bite of pancake. "I don't 'member."

"I dreamed I was Superman!" Masen shouted, dipping his pancake roll in more syrup. "I was flying and I fought the bad guys!" He swung his fist to emphasize his story and inadvertently knocked over his milk.

"Masen," Bella chided, yanking a towel from the oven handle and blotting up the milk. "You need to be more careful."

"Sorry, Mommy," Masen replied. "You're not gonna cry, are you?"

Bella finished wiping up the milk and tossed the towel in the sink. "Why would I cry?"

"I don't know," Masen answered with a shrug, "but Grandma Esme says you shouldn't cry over spilled milk."

Bella laughed, and Edward felt his heart warm at the sound as he joined in. Bella caught his eye and, for the first time since he'd arrived the day before, a genuine smile lit her eyes before she turned back to Masen.

She tapped him on the nose. "I'm not going to cry," she assured him, pouring him some more milk. "Just try not to knock over your glass again, okay?"

Masen agreed, carefully picking it up to take a long swallow as Bella set a plate of pancakes and bacon in front of Edward.

"Thank you," he said quietly. Bella just nodded in acknowledgement and moved to the sink to wash some dishes.

Edward finished his breakfast, and after a rather involved goodbye ritual with the kids, stood awkwardly in front of his wife.

"So, I'll be back at five," he promised.

"I'll be ready," she said. "Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise," he told her, seizing a moment of courage to lean in and kiss her cheek. He was grateful she didn't pull away.

"Just dress nice," he said. "I'll take care of everything."

Edward got into his car, clutching his business card in his hand as he started the little sedan. He made his way to the address of the _Forks Weekly_, frowning slightly when he saw the small sign on a strip mall storefront.

"Well, it's no network news spot, but it's all mine," he said under his breath as he parked and made his way to the front door. A bell rang as he walked in, and an older woman sitting at a messy desk looked up. It took Edward a moment to recognize the familiar face as the former secretary at Forks High.

"Mrs. Cope?"

The woman laughed boisterously. "Mrs. Cope?" she repeated. "Since when have we gone back to that? I haven't been Mrs. Cope to you for years, Edward…especially since you became my boss."

Edward forced a laugh. "Oh, just had a flashback, I guess…" He surreptitiously glanced at the nameplate on her desk. "…Shelly."

She giggled. "Oh, before I forget, Jessica wanted me to tell you she's up at the Rez covering the school board meeting. She said she'd drop by and get some pictures and quotes for the story on the new community center while she's there."

Edward nodded, his eyes drawn to a huge whiteboard on the wall behind Mrs. Cope's – _Shelly's_, he corrected – desk. It was a list of the stories for the next issue, along with the reporters assigned to each story. From what he could tell, they were operating on a skeleton crew. No wonder he worked so much.

"Are you still heading up to Port Angeles for the firefighter story?" she asked.

"Firefighter story?" he repeated.

Shelly rolled her eyes good naturedly. Apparently, absent-mindedness was not unusual for Edward. "The file's on your desk," she reminded him, "as well as the one for the food bank feature. You're set up for that one at one o'clock."

Edward began to panic. He had to drive to Port Angeles, do the interviews for this firefighter story – whatever it was – as well as a food bank feature, find a suit, make reservations at the restaurant and the hotel, order flowers and a limo, find some decent champagne in a town well known for its affinity for Vitamin R…the list was growing by the minute.

He started to feel dizzy, wondering if he could pull this off.

"Edward, is everything all right?" Shelly asked, a concerned look wiping the pleasant smile from her face.

Edward rubbed his temple, feeling the beginnings of a headache. "It's just that…I hoped to plan a special night for Bella…"

Shelly's eyes softened. "That's so sweet. Can I help?"

Edward's eyes widened at the offer. "Could you? It would mean a lot to me."

She waved a hand. "It's no problem. So, you want a special table at The Lodge?" She picked up the phone.

Edward frowned at the mention of Forks' only nice restaurant. It was nowhere near nice enough for Bella. "No, I had something a little more special in mind." With that, he outlined his plan for Shelly Cope.

Shelly stared at him for a moment when he finally finished. "You want to do all of this _tonight_?" she asked.

"Yes. Can you do it?"

Shelly sighed heavily. "It'll take some doing, but yes, I think I can do it. You know this is going to cost a fortune, right?"

Edward smiled. "It's a special occasion." He reached into his pocket for his wallet, pulling out a credit card, then thinking the better of it and handing her three of them. "Just put it all on those," he said.

Feeling a weight lifted off his shoulders, Edward made his way toward an office in the back of the room with a glass door boasting a brass placard declaring him Editor-in-Chief. He found the files Shelly had mentioned on top of a mountain of paperwork on his desk and flipped through them quickly. Evidently, the firefighter story was a look at the impact of budget cuts on the Clallam County Fire District. The food bank feature was a typical holiday story about the need for donations. It all looked relatively cut and dried and he felt he could easily get both stories done in the time allotted.

Until he actually got to Port Angeles.

His phone rang non-stop on the drive and he spent most of the time on his headset, putting out fires at the printer and with other reporters in the field. He was exhausted by the time he pulled into the parking lot adjacent to the fire station, and finally had to shut his phone off when he sat down to do the interview with the police chief and a few of the firefighters who'd had their hours cut back because of the budget cuts. He snapped a few pictures with his digital camera and headed for the only department store in town, turning his phone on to find he had seven voicemails.

He listened to them briefly, relieved when he found there was nothing pressing that couldn't wait until after he'd found a decent suit...which proved to be a little easier said than done. He scanned the racks, finally deciding on a dark gray that fit him relatively well – there was no time for alterations – and a pair of black shoes that squeaked slightly, but looked pretty good. He opted for a white shirt and dark green tie, since the selections were limited, and put the whole thing on the one credit card he'd held back from Mrs. Cope.

Edward had a moment of panic as he handed the card to the cashier, wondering if he had enough available on the card to cover the near-thousand dollar total. He breathed a sigh of relief when the young woman handed him the slip to sign and thanked him for his business. He put in a call to Shelly as he walked back to his car.

"How's it going?" he asked when she answered the phone.

"So far, so good," she said. "I got hold of Waylon Forge, and he'll meet you at the airport at five-thirty. I called in some favors and got you the okay to land on the ABC affiliate's helipad in Seattle. The limo will meet you there to take you to Canlis. The suite at Sorrento is reserved in your name, and Waylon will be back to pick you up at nine in the morning."

"Thanks Shelly. You're a miracle worker."

"I know," she said smugly. "Oh, and one thing?"

"Yes?"

"At Canlis," she said hesitantly. "They may be under the impression that you're a food critic from the New York Times."

"What?"

"Hey," Shelly replied, her voice taking on a defensive tone. "It was the only way I could get you a reservation so quickly. Plus, you'll probably get a few extras," she pointed out.

"Okay," Edward rubbed the bridge of his nose, wondering how he could pull off posing as a food critic.

"And the Sorrento might be under the impression you're writing an article for _Conde Nast_," she added.

"Good Lord," Edward muttered.

"You ask for miracles, you've got to be willing to pay the price," she pointed out.

"It's…fine, Shelly. It's great. I really appreciate all your help."

"No problem," she said. "Just have a great time."

Edward hung up and checked his watch. With a low curse, he realized that he was already fifteen minutes late for his appointment at the food bank. He got into the car and turned the key.

And nothing happened.

"Come on," he encouraged the little car, as he turned the key again.

Nothing.

"Shit!" he exclaimed, popping the hood and getting out of the car to stare at the engine. Which was pretty much useless, since he knew virtually nothing about engines.

"Car trouble?" An older man paused on the sidewalk, peering in at the motor.

Edward fought back a sarcastic retort. "Yeah. It won't start. And I'm already late for an appointment."

The man leaned in, examining the engine closely and wiggling a few wires. "Try it now," he suggested.

Edward got back in the car and turned the key, hoping the wire-wiggling had fixed the problem.

It hadn't.

"Looks like a dead battery," the man said, pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiping his hands. "I've got some cables in my truck. I'd be happy to give you a jump."

"Really?" Edward was shocked at the stranger's willingness to help him. It wasn't something that happened often in New York. "I'd really appreciate it."

"Sure, no problem," the man said, waving a hand in dismissal. "I'll go get my truck."

While Edward waited, he called the food bank to let them know what was happening, then scrolled through his phone numbers, breathing a relieved sigh when he found one labeled, "Mom." He placed a quick call to his mother, who was more than happy to take the children for the night, and Edward was thankful at least that hurdle had been cleared.

He waited for the man to return, checking his watch every few minutes. Finally, forty-five minutes later, a rickety old Ford pickup pulled up in front of him, the engine rattling loudly. Edward suppressed his irritation and pasted a smile on his face.

"Did you get lost?" he asked jokingly.

The man just blinked at him. "No," he said, before pulling a set of jumper cables out of the bed of his truck. He quickly hooked up to Edward's battery, and Edward thanked him profusely before finally setting off toward the food bank. His foot anxiously pressed the gas pedal while his eyes scanned side streets and the rearview mirror, hoping to avoid getting a speeding ticket.

He pulled up in front of the food bank more than an hour late. He wasn't so much worried about the interview – the director was happy the paper was doing the story at all and bent over backward to accommodate Edward. But with the car trouble, Edward was on a tight schedule to get home to pick up Bella. He'd have to speed through the interviews, snap a few pictures, and get out of town as soon as possible.

Unfortunately, the schedule at the food bank was not quite as tight. He found the director, Jason Matthews, helping to unload a truckload of produce at the back door, and waited rather impatiently for him to finish.

"I can interview you right here," Edward offered, glancing at his watch again and wincing at the passing time.

"No, we'll be more comfortable in my office," Jason said. "This will just take a minute."

When Jason finally finished with the truck and led Edward to his office, it was almost three o'clock and Edward's teeth were on edge. Jason was a tedious interview – slow-speaking, and Edward felt like he had to drag every quote from his lips. When he finally finished with him and the two food bank customers that Jason had recommended Edward interview as well, he was nearly frantic. He took a few pictures of empty shelves and the outside of the facility and practically ran to his car. It was after four o'clock. He barely had time to get home and change before they needed to meet Waylon at the airport.

Of course, the car wouldn't start.

"Fuck!" Edward exclaimed, pounding on the steering wheel in frustration. He still needed to get flowers on the way home, and his stupid battery was dead again. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"

"Having trouble, Edward?" Jason's face appeared at his passenger side window, his voice muffled by the glass.

Edward rolled down the window, fighting to control his frustration and smile hopefully at the man.

"Got any jumper cables?" he asked.


	8. Chapter 8  All I Want for Christmas is

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 8 – All I Want for Christmas is You**

By the time Jason and Edward managed to get his car started, Edward was in a near panic. He called Bella, getting her voicemail, and assured her he was on his way, and would be there as soon as possible. He left the car running when he dashed into a small florist shop, picking up a bouquet of red roses. He knew they were cliché, but didn't have any other options.

Finally…_finally,_ he sped down Highway 101, his eyes compulsively drifting to the dashboard clock. No matter how many times he looked at it, it still told him the same thing.

He was late.

He'd called Shelly and asked her to contact Waylon and let him know what was happening. Things weren't going quite as planned, but Edward was determined not to let the day's events ruin everything.

Edward's new suit slid off the back of the passenger seat and he reached over to straighten it quickly. He had no time for a shower, that was for sure. He sniffed at himself. Not too bad. A quick spritz of cologne ought to do the job.

His gaze flicked back to the suit. He had wanted to be wearing it when he picked Bella up – not running through the front door in a crazed hurry to change.

Kind of ruined the romance.

He eyed the suit speculatively, then examined the empty road.

He could pull over and change, but it would be much quicker to just do it while he was driving. His eyes narrowed at the plastic-wrapped garment next to him. The shirt and tie would be no problem. He was already wearing dark socks, and changing shoes would be easy.

The pants, though. The pants could prove challenging.

"Fuck it," he muttered, reaching over with one hand to unbutton the shirt and pull it off the hanger. Of course, the jacket came with it and Edward cursed lightly as he shook the shirt free, then draped the jacket over the seat back. He only bothered to release the top two buttons on the shirt he was wearing before quickly tugging it over his head, the car swerving slightly. Gritting his teeth, he threw his flannel over his shoulder before slipping an arm into the crisp, white shirt. He leaned forward, his left arm flailing behind him as he tried to find the sleeve opening, the seatbelt cutting across his neck. By the time he managed to get his arm in the sleeve he was damp with sweat. He tried to pull the shirt up onto his shoulders.

It just…wouldn't…come.

"Fuck!" he exclaimed in frustration. After a few more wiggles and a frustrated yank that he feared would tear the seams, he realized he'd managed to twist the shirt behind him. He was now trapped in some kind of white cotton straightjacket of doom.

Edward realized he was quickly closing in on the Forks city limits and decided to quit while he was behind and pull over at the next opportunity. He spotted a wide spot on the shoulder and stopped there in relief. He would have preferred something a little more hidden from the road, but traffic was light, and he didn't really see any better options.

Edward quickly released his seatbelt and managed to break free of his shirt prison with a victorious grunt. He pulled the shirt on and shimmied out of his jeans, reaching for the new pants and glancing at his watch simultaneously. If he hurried, they'd still make their reservation at Canlis.

Edward tossed the jeans into the back seat and looked into the rearview mirror just in time to see a flash of red and blue.

Red and blue lights.

As in…lights on a police car.

With a groan, Edward scrambled to jam his legs into the suit pants, pulling them up over his thighs just as an officer tapped on the window with the end of his flashlight.

Edward readied a sheepish smile and looked up…only to come face to face with the one person he pretty much never wanted to meet with his pants down.

That's right. Chief Charlie Swan.

A phrase involving "deer", "headlights", and a rather colorful profanity ran through Edward's mind.

He rolled down the window. "Hi, Chief," he said, deciding to play it off as a joke. It was his father-in-law, after all.

"Edward," the Chief replied, his pointed gaze taking in Edward's disheveled appearance. "License and registration."

Huh. Bella's father never did like him. Figured that wouldn't change, even in an alternate reality. Of course, he _was_ half-naked on the side of the road.

Edward fumbled in his pants, realizing his wallet was in the jeans he'd thrown into the back of the car. He swallowed thickly, then turned and bent over the seat, pulling his pants up over his ass as he moved. He retrieved the wallet and handed his license and registration to the Chief.

Charlie Swan, face devoid of emotion, examined the documents, then eyed Edward suspiciously. "You want to tell me what you're doing, Edward?"

Edward forced a laugh. "Funny story," he began, but at the Chief's deadpan expression, he decided on another tact.

"I was just trying to surprise Bella," he said instead. "I'm taking her to a nice dinner tonight, and I'm running late. I thought it might be easier to change in the car."

Edward swore he saw the Chief's lips quirk slightly. Of course he might have imagined that.

"How's that working for you?" he asked.

"Uh…not so good," Edward replied, buttoning up his shirt and tucking it into his pants quickly as he reached for his tie. "Do you think you could let me off with a warning? I really want to get to Bella."

Chief Swan's face took on a dark look. "She does deserve a night out. Especially after what happened Christmas Eve."

Edward's heart sank. Did everyone know about that? The ever-grinding gossip mill was one thing he didn't miss about small towns.

"Well…uh…I really want to try and make it up to her."

"You should."

The Chief stood silently for a moment, and Edward wondered if he was going to let him go, or haul him in for questioning.

Or torture.

The Chief tapped the butt of his flashlight against his open palm, his eyes impassive, and Edward swallowed thickly.

Fortunately, Chief Swan had mercy on his son-in-law, and with a few gruff words and a warning not to change on the side of the road again, he handed the license and registration to Edward and turned to go back to his cruiser.

Edward breathed a heavy sigh and adjusted his tie, examining it in the rearview mirror. He saw Charlie watching him, and quickly reached for the key.

In a perfect world, the car would have started and Edward would have made it home in time to whisk Bella away to a beautiful dinner at a four-star restaurant.

In _Edward's_ world, the car wouldn't start, he had to ask his father-in-law – who apparently hated his guts – to give him a jump, and when he finally got home he was in such a rush that he slammed the roses in the car door.

Bella, to her credit, smiled prettily when he offered the slightly crushed flowers to her. He rang the doorbell and couldn't speak when Bella opened it. She wore a green silky dress that wrapped around her slender frame and swayed hypnotically when she moved. Edward had only been able to thrust the roses toward her, like a teenager on his first date.

"I…uh…had some trouble with the flowers…and the car door," he explained lamely as several petals fell to the floor.

Bella laughed. "Well, they're beautiful. Thank you."

Edward followed her into the kitchen as she put the roses in a vase, trying not to be obvious when he glanced at his watch. Fortunately, his mother had already picked up the children, who would spend the night with her and Carlisle. Still, Edward knew they needed to get going.

"Are you ready?" he asked Bella as she filled a vase and began arranging the less-damaged flowers.

"Hmm?"

Edward cleared his throat. "Are you ready to go? We have a reservation."

She hurriedly stuck the rest of the flowers into the vase, adjusting them slightly as she frowned. "Okay," she said, drying her hands on a towel. "Let me get my coat."

They managed to get out of the house and into the minivan – Edward wasn't going to trust his untrustworthy battery for this night – and headed out of town.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked. "I thought we were heading to The Lodge."

Edward just smiled enigmatically. "It's a surprise." He was pleased to see Bella flush a little in pleasure and watched her out of the corner of his eye as they approached the airport.

"Edward?" She looked at him questioningly as he parked the van, going around to open the door and help her out.

"Just come on," he said quietly, taking her hand in his. The feel of her soft skin against his made him feel warm and slightly giddy. He led her across the tarmac to where Waylon was completing a pre-flight check on his helicopter.

Bella came to an abrupt stop. "We're not going up in that," she stated, shaking her head slowly.

Edward tugged on her arm. "It'll be fun. Come on."

"Fun?" she repeated, turning panicked eyes to him. "Edward, those things are dangerous…and Waylon Forge?" Her voice lowered to a whisper. "You know that guy's a nutjob!

"Relax, Bella. I've flown in these a million times," he assured her.

"You have? When?" Bella asked, confused.

Edward faltered. _In another life. In another world._

"Okay, you got me," he admitted after a moment. "Maybe not a million times, but believe me, it's perfectly safe."

"I don't know," she said hesitantly.

"Come on, Bella…please." He turned a pleading gaze on her, hoping she was still susceptible to it. "I have an amazing evening planned…but we need to get in that helicopter to make it happen."

Bella bit her lip, eyeing the chopper warily. When she released her lip, Edward knew he'd won.

"Okay. Let's go."

They ran toward the helicopter and Waylon helped them both in, handing them headsets before starting the rotor.

"Just relax," Waylon said with a grin, his voice tinny over the headset. "You'll be in Seattle in no time."

"How long have you been flying, Waylon?" Bella asked, her voice cracking nervously.

Waylon laughed, exchanging a few words with the tower before pulling the stick and launching them off the ground. "Longer than you've been alive, sweetie," he said. "Used to make supply runs in 'Nam before I took some shrapnel to my knee." He rubbed his leg for a moment. "Ferrying tourists around the Peninsula isn't the same as dodging mortar fire, but…" His voice trailed off almost longingly at the thought of his war years and Bella exchanged a significant look with Edward.

_See?_ she seemed to say with her eyes. _Nutjob!_

Edward stifled a chuckle.

They landed in Seattle and Bella was sufficiently awed at the sleek black limousine waiting for them. Edward found a bottle of champagne chilling inside the vehicle and mentally thanked Shelly for her foresight as he poured them both a glass.

Bella sipped at the bubbly liquid. "I haven't had champagne since Alice and Jasper's wedding," she said. "That didn't go so well."

Edward just laughed as if he knew what she was talking about.

"Hopefully, you won't have to hold my hair this time," she continued, shedding some light on what must have happened at his sister's wedding.

Edward smiled warmly. "I would, you know," he replied earnestly. "I'd do anything for you, Bella."

He worried Bella might find the sentiment corny, but she smiled – a real smile – and Edward's heart soared. It was working. She would forgive him and they would be happy.

Finally.


	9. Chapter 9  Silent Night

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:** Oh, so many of you are feeling for poor Edward. He's really trying, but it seems he can't catch a break, can he? There were some questions regarding his encounter with Chief Swan – specifically, why he would have been in trouble. First of all, you can assume the Chief was behind him for some time before Edward pulled over, so most likely saw him driving erratically – that could be negligent or reckless driving. Second, on most highways in Washington, you're not supposed to pull over on the shoulder unless you're having car trouble, or there's some kind of emergency (and changing your clothes would not qualify.) Third, there was a certain element of Chief Swan just not being too happy with Edward – and the embarrassment of being caught with your pants down (literally) in front of your father-in-law…and you can bet the chief recognized Edward's car and wanted to know what the hell he was up to!

Anyway – hope that clears some things up. Now on to the date…

* * *

**Chapter 9 – Silent Night**

They pulled up to the front of the restaurant and the driver quickly rounded the front of the limo to open the car door with a flourish. This time it was Bella who slipped her hand into Edward's as they approached the glass doors of the angular wood and stone structure. Edward held the door as Bella entered, then pressed his hand lightly to her lower back as they took in the flickering firelight coming from the stone fireplace, and the incredible views in the dining room beyond.

"This is amazing, Edward," Bella whispered, once the waitress had left them with ice water and a bread basket. She turned to look out the floor-to-ceiling windows at the sparkling lights of Seattle reflecting off the surface of Lake Union below them.

"Don't get me wrong," she continued, "I appreciate it – really – but how can we afford all this?"

"Don't worry about it," Edward replied dismissively, buttering a piece of bread. He didn't notice Bella's frown at his response, and the arrival of the waitress ended the conversation for the moment.

The meal was exquisite, and enormous. Edward had only ordered a prawn appetizer for the two of them to share and Colorado lamb chops with cous cous, while Bella opted for the Sablefish with matsutake mushrooms and bok choy. However, the waitress kept bringing them other dishes to sample. When Edward protested that he hadn't ordered them, the waitress just smiled and said they were on the house. Foie gras, yellow fin tuna, steak tartare, gnocchi with black truffles…the list went on and on, and Edward soon lost track of what they'd eaten. Although he understood that this was because of the cover story Shelly had concocted about him being a food critic, Bella just laughed and marveled at their amazing luck. The owner of the restaurant even stopped by to make sure they were happy with their meal. He also presented them with a complimentary bottle of champagne as they enjoyed their dessert samplers of crème brulee, Grand Marnier soufflé, and some kind of doughnuts with passion fruit-vanilla cream, coconut, and macadamia nuts.

Edward briefly contemplated a change in career. How hard could it be to be a food critic anyway?

They left the restaurant with their stomachs full, a little tipsy, and laughing at the most ridiculous things. The limo was waiting for them and as they tumbled into the seat, Edward lost his balance, falling onto Bella. He found himself sprawled over her, his left knee pressed between hers and their faces so close he could feel her warm breath on his lips.

He froze, wondering if she would protest, and unable to move until he found out. She said nothing, her eyes dipping to his lips before she licked her own slowly and brought her gaze back to meet his. He leaned closer, almost near enough to taste her mouth… waiting to see if she would stop him.

She didn't.

Edward cheered inwardly, the man who'd longed for Bella Swan for ten long years finally breathing a sigh of relief as their lips brushed gently.

"Bella," he murmured into her mouth, as she opened it on a sigh. He took it as an invitation and swept his tongue inside, shivering at the sensation as it slid sinuously along hers. She tasted of coconut and vanilla and champagne, and Edward fought not to consume her, afraid he'd scare her and he'd have to stop kissing her.

He never wanted to stop.

Bella seemed to feel the same way. She tilted her head to deepen the kiss, her hands sweeping up his arms to settle on the back of his neck, massaging him gently. He moaned at the sensation, sliding his arms underneath her to pull her more firmly against him. He was rewarded by the gyration of Bella's hips as she ground into his already painful erection. He slid a hand under her filmy skirt, stroking the soft skin of her thigh, and finally slipping it under the side of her panties to squeeze her luscious ass.

He'd wanted to do that for hours.

They made out like teenagers, all teeth and tongue and moaning and groping…grinding against each other in a frenzy of lust and champagne-fueled loss of inhibition.

"God, Edward…" Bella ripped the tails of his shirt from his pants and thrust her hands underneath, raking her nails up and down his back. Edward threw his head back, reveling in the sensation as he pulled Bella's hips even tighter against his own. He lowered his head, pulling her neckline aside and shoving away the cup of her bra as he latched onto her nipple, sucking deeply.

She came.

Edward felt her tense against him, every muscle curled in tight expectation. Then, as he watched in awe, her face erupted into a blissful smile, a high whimper escaped her lips, and her body shuddered in a delicious cycle of contraction and release. He held her tight, watching her climax…a heated gentleness passing through him that had less to do with lust, and everything to do with love.

God, he loved her.

The limo came to a stop and Edward realized they'd arrived at the hotel. He quickly got up, shielding Bella from the door as he straightened her dress, ignoring his own disheveled appearance. Her eyes drifted halfway open as a sleepy smile lit her face.

"We're here," he said quietly.

Bella blinked, then sat up just as the driver opened the passenger door. Edward took her hand with a wide smile and led her through the huge iron gates and front gardens of the Sorrento Hotel, then under the green awning and into the spacious interior.

"What are we doing here?" Bella asked, her face still slightly dazed, as if she'd just realized where they were.

Edward just leaned in to kiss her cheek. "Wait here just a minute," he said, before approaching the check-in desk. He glanced back at Bella to find her biting her lip nervously as she surveyed the paneled walls, rich carpeting, and leather furniture mixed with luscious, dark fabrics. She caught his eye, smiling weakly, and Edward wondered if she was nervous…if he was assuming too much taking her to a hotel.

Of course, he realized they were married and had slept together many times. But since he'd arrived, the tension between them made it apparent that those times had been fewer and farther between lately. And the encounter in the limo was the first time he'd really had a taste of Bella in that way.

He wanted more than a taste. He wanted the entire fucking banquet.

He swallowed thickly, turning back to the desk clerk and fighting down the animalistic urges that pushed at his control. Tonight was about winning Bella back…and not just getting her in bed.

Still, he would have been lying to say he didn't have high hopes that would be part of the package.

Palming the room key, Edward crossed to Bella, wrapping an arm around her waist and turning toward the elevators.

"Edward, this really isn't necessary," she whispered. "We have a perfectly good bed at home."

Edward laughed as they entered the elevator and ascended to their floor. Bella shifted nervously on her feet, her face flushing slightly.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Edward…" she began, but the opening of the elevator doors interrupted whatever she was going say. He took her hand, pulling her down the hallway toward their corner suite. Opening the door with a flourish, he watched Bella's face as she looked into the room, her breath catching in her throat.

A sitting area was set up in front of a massive bay window looking out over the city lights. Palm fronds swayed in the slight breeze from the heater vents, giving the room a glamorous, old-Hollywood feel. A fire burned in the fireplace off to the side, next to a gleaming wooden desk sporting yet another bottle of champagne on ice. Through a set of double doors to the left of the sitting area, a king-sized bed with white linens, piles of pillows, and a puffy cloud of a duvet beckoned.

Edward felt it calling to him personally.

Bella took a few steps into the room, spinning in a slow circle and taking it all in.

"Edward. This is too much," she said finally.

"No," he replied, moving toward her and taking her in his arms. "Nothing's too much for you."

"That's sweet, really…but all of this…for just a few hours…"

Unable to resist, he leaned in to kiss her neck, nuzzling her hair to inhale her scent. "We have all night…there's no rush."

"What?"

His lips trailed along the neckline of her dress. "We have all night…then room service in the morning…and I thought we'd spend the day exploring the city." He nibbled at her collarbone. "Or we could stay here, if you want. We don't have to leave the room."

Suddenly she pushed him away. "We can't stay here all night."

"Why not?" he asked, reaching for her. "My mom's happy to keep the kids. You know that."

"You really don't remember, do you?" Bella's face was flushed, her eyes flashing. Edward suddenly realized that what he'd identified as nerves, was in fact, anger.

She was _pissed._

And he had absolutely no idea why.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his stomach sinking. "Remember what?"

Bella pushed her hair back from her face before letting her arms fall to her sides in defeat. "The writing seminar, Edward? I've only been talking about it for months."

Edward opened his mouth, but no words came out. He just didn't know what to say.

"God, Edward. It was one day…_one day_…all I asked was for you to watch the kids so I could go to this seminar. You know how important this is to me!"

"Well," Edward floundered. "You can still go. We'll head home first thing in the morning."

"It's in _Portland_, Edward!" she countered. "I was going to have to get up at five in the morning to drive down. I could have left from here if we'd brought the car, but that's not even the point."

"Well what _is_ the point?" he replied, feeling a surge of his own anger. He was just trying to create a romantic evening, and all she could give him was a load of shit.

"The point, Edward," she said through gritted teeth, "is that you didn't even _remember_. You made all of these plans and now I'm the bitch for ruining them."

"You're not a bitch."

"Well, I _feel_ like one," she said angrily. "I _feel_ like I'm supposed to forget about the seminar and just tell you it's not a big deal. Yet again, what I want…what I _need_ is disregarded. What's important to me doesn't even matter to you!"

"That's not true." Edward stuck his chin out stubbornly.

"No?" Bella retorted. "What about U-Dub, Edward?"

"What?"

Bella rolled her eyes. "I was ten credits and a thesis away from my Master's…_ten credits_, Edward."

"So? That's my fault?" he countered, getting frustrated at her attitude, despite the fact that he didn't even know what she was talking about.

"No, it's not your fault," she said sarcastically. "But you didn't exactly make it easy for me to go back and finish."

"You could have done it if you really wanted to." He crossed his arms over his chest, unsure if he was correct, but too swept up in the argument to care.

"How, Edward?" she replied, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. "With two kids? With a mortgage and a car payment? With you off chasing your dream of starting your own paper?"

"My dream?" Edward repeated with a choked laugh. "You think a fucking weekly paper in Forks is _my _dream? Yeah, right Bella, because covering Wal-mart openings and the local elementary school Christmas pageant is the height of investigative journalism!"

"Oh, so it all comes back to this again."

"To what?"

"To what? To New York, that's what. You've never forgiven me for missing that internship."

"I…I what?" Edward pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. How was he supposed to argue that point when he had no idea if it was true? He couldn't imagine resenting Bella for not taking the internship. Of course, he really didn't understand why he didn't take it in the first place.

"I should have gone," he said quietly.

"I can't believe you said that."

"If I would have gone, I would have had a better job. I could have provided for you and kids better. You would have been able to finish your Master's."

"Kids? There wouldn't have _been_ any kids, Edward. You would have been in New York and I would have been here. We decided _together_ that you'd stay here and take the job at the _Times_. You said you wanted to be with me."

"I do want to be with you."

"Then why do you keep throwing that decision back in my face?"

"Why do you keep bringing up your Master's?"

Bella paused, breathing heavily for a moment before she collapsed on the lavish sofa, her head falling into her hands. "I can't keep doing this."

Edward rubbed the back of his neck, trying to ease the tension there. He approached Bella, all anger gone, and fell to his knees in front of her.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

"You're always sorry, Edward. I'm sorry, too." She sat back eyeing him steadily. "How did we get here? Resenting each other…ignoring each other?"

Edward reached tentatively for her hand, stroking the back of it gently. "I don't know. We can get back, though…can't we? Can't we at least try?"

Bella smiled sadly at him, but said nothing.

~0~

They rented a car and drove home in silence. They made it to the ferry dock just in time to catch the last ferry for the night. Exhausted, Bella fell asleep curled up against the back of the seat. Edward watched her as the huge boat powered across Puget Sound, rocking slightly in the waves.

His romantic night had turned into a disaster…and he had no idea how to fix it. The ten years they'd been together…the ten years he'd missed…had somehow damaged what they'd once had.

Still…it wasn't dead.

Edward knew he was still in love with Bella…he had no doubt of it. And deep down, he knew that Bella still loved him too.

She was hurt, angry, and frustrated, but she still loved him.

He would have to find a way to make it up to her. A way to show her they still had a chance.

He just had no idea how to do it.

* * *

**A/N:** Oh, these two are having some problems, but Edward's not giving up hope – so make sure you don't either! *points around room*

By the way, the places Edward and Bella went on their date are real – and they're incredibly beautiful. Hit up Google if you'd like to see some pictures.


	10. Chapter 10  My True Love Gave to Me

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 10 – My True Love Gave to Me**

"I thought I knew what I was doing, but I had no clue," Edward told Jasper once they'd dropped off the rental car in Port Angeles. Bella had left early in the morning to head to Portland for her writing seminar, leaving Edward with the kids and a Volvo that had to be back at Budget Rent-a-Car by noon. Jasper had agreed to drive Edward's car so he'd have a way home. They'd stopped by Emmett's garage before they left Forks, and he'd given Edward a good deal on a new battery, so he was hopeful he could avoid jumper cables for a while.

The kids had spotted the famous Golden Arches, prompting a stop at McDonald's to play in the tubes, slides, and ball pit in between bites of Chicken McNuggets and fries.

"It was going so well," Edward continued, eyeing Masen as he dipped a nugget in some ketchup. "Then I ended up on the couch…_again_."

"Ouch," Jasper commented. "So all that build up and you didn't even get to have…" He glanced at the kids. "…uh…_pillows?_" he said significantly, evidently trying to speak in code to avoid uncomfortable questions.

Edward laughed humorlessly, munching on a French fry. "Nope. No _pillows_ for me. Not even a little one."

"How long has it been since you've had… a pillow?" Jasper asked.

"I can't even remember," Edward said honestly.

Masen smiled brightly. "You can use my pillow, Daddy. I have two!"

Edward smiled, ruffling his son's hair. "Thanks, buddy."

"I'm done," Masen announced. "Can I go play some more?"

Edward nodded. "Watch out for Makenna, okay?"

"I will," he said, taking his little sister's hand and leading her to the ball pit. Edward's eyes never left them, a paternal protectiveness he never knew he possessed taking over. He spoke to Jasper, but didn't look away from his children.

"I just don't know what she wants," he admitted to his brother-in-law. "I thought if I took her out for a night on the town…showed her how important she was to me, it would be enough, but…"

"That's rough, man," Jasper said through a mouthful of burger. He swallowed and took a sip of his Coke. "What are you going to do now?"

"I'm not sure," Edward replied, picking at the bun on his burger and half-smiling as Masen gently tossed a red ball to Makenna. "Maybe I should get her something pretty. Women like jewelry, right?"

Jasper laughed. "If my wife is any indication, I'd say yes, women like jewelry." He sobered slightly. "But I don't know if that's what the situation calls for, Edward. Bella's not really one for fancy things."

"But she _should_ be," Edward countered. "She should have every beautiful thing…and I should be the one to give them to her."

"Well, it's worth a try, I guess," Jasper said doubtfully. "But I don't know that throwing money at the problem is really the solution."

"It's not about throwing money at it," Edward replied stubbornly. "It's about showing Bella how special she is."

Jasper just shrugged and wished his friend luck.

~0~

They dropped Jasper off at his parents' house on the north side of town. He said Alice would meet him there later, and he'd ride home with her. Edward and the kids set out to find a jewelry store that sold more than turquoise and friendship bracelets. They finally found a little shop squeezed between a bookstore and a specialty tea shop that looked promising.

With a firm admonishment not to touch anything, Edward walked into the store, holding his children's hands tightly in each of his own.

"Can I help you find something?" an older woman wearing a sequined snowman sweater popped up from behind the counter. She smiled down at Masen and Makenna. "Oh, what adorable children!" she exclaimed. "Would you like a candy cane?"

The kids looked up at Edward for permission before nodding slowly. The woman bent down to hand them each a little candy cane and touched their cheeks gently. "So much like my own grandchildren," she mused. "Don't get to see them much since my son and his family moved to Phoenix." She sighed heavily, then shook her head.

"Enough about me," she said, standing up quickly. "What can I help you with today?"

Edward winced slightly. "I'm not exactly sure. I'd like to find something for my wife."

The woman chuckled. "In the doghouse, huh?"

"Something like that."

Masen tugged on his father's sleeve, pulling out his candy cane to whisper. "Daddy, we don't have a doghouse."

The saleslady burst out laughing. "Oh, he's a cute one!" she said, touching his cheek again. "Say, what's your name?"

"Masen."

"And your sister?"

"Makenna."

"Well, Masen, if it's okay with your daddy, I have a few toys back behind the counter over there." She pointed to where she'd been standing when they walked in. "You can take Makenna over there to play while I help your daddy find a present for your mom."

Once again, Masen looked up at Edward for permission. Edward didn't understand the warm swelling he felt in his heart at the boy's hopefully gaze.

"It's okay. Go ahead," Edward encouraged him. Masen took his sister's hand and led her behind the counter. He could see them pull a couple of little trucks from a basket of toys and begin running them along the floor.

"Thanks," Edward said, "Mrs…"

The woman waved a hand. "Oh, just call me Claire," she said.

"I'm Edward."

"Fine…fine, Edward," Claire said cheerfully. "Now, you want something for your lovely wife. Maybe a necklace…or a nice bracelet?"

Edward's eyes ran over the glittering pieces nestled in black velvet under glass. "I think…something simple?" he said, more as a question than a statement.

Claire nodded, tapping her fingers against her lips as she thought. She rounded the counter, unlocking a sliding panel and pulling out one of the velvet trays. She picked up a silver bracelet made up of delicate links. A heart-shaped charm dangled from the chain, glinting in the dim light.

"We can engrave her name on the charm while you wait," Claire told him. "We could even set the heart with the children's birthstones if you'd like…make it a little more special. That would take a few hours, though."

"Really?" Edward asked, reaching out to touch the little silver charm. "How much?"

Claire told him, and after only a brief hesitation, Edward nodded, reaching for his wallet and his now well-used credit card. He wondered what his limit was and once again held his breath while she ran it through, only releasing it when she handed the sales slip to him to sign.

"Now," she said, handing him a receipt. "Which birthstones do you need?"

Edward blanched. He had absolutely no idea. "I…uh…I don't know."

Claire laughed. "Oh, most men don't," she said. "Just give me their birthdays and I can figure it out."

Crap. How could he explain to this woman that he didn't know his own children's birthdays? Yeah. That'd get him nominated for Father of the Year for sure.

Masen chose that moment to approach, reaching for his father's hand. Edward leaned down to pick him up, seeing an opportunity to redeem himself, or at least cover his ignorance.

"Masen," he said. "Can you tell the nice lady your birthday?"

Masen smiled. "I'm gonna be seven!"

"That's lovely," Claire replied, reaching out to ruffle his hair. "When's your birthday?"

"February eighth," he said proudly, stumbling slightly over the pronunciation of "February."

"February," Claire repeated. "That's amethyst. What about your sister?"

Masen frowned. "I don't know."

Edward's stomach fell. Quickly, he reached in his pocket. "My phone," he said apologetically, flipping it open and hoping the woman believed he had it on vibrate. "I'll just be a second."

Claire nodded as Edward set Masen on the floor by his sister and the little boy went back to playing with trucks. Edward said "Hello" like he was answering the phone, and when Claire looked away, quickly dialed Jasper's number.

"Hello?"

"Jasper," Edward whispered, walking to the far end of the store. "When's Makenna's birthday?'"

"Edward?"

Edward rolled his eyes. "Yes…yes, it's Edward. I need your help."

"What's wrong?"

"I need to know Makenna's birthday."

"You don't remember her birthday?" Jasper asked, his voice laced with confusion.

Edward sighed in frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose and fighting to speak quietly. "Please, Jasper…just…humor me, okay?"

"Edward, what is _wrong_ with you?"

"Jasper!" Edward shouted into the phone, and catching Claire's surprised expression, quickly forced a smile and lowered his voice. "Help me out here."

"Okay…okay," Jasper replied. "It's April fourteenth. Edward, are you sure you're okay?"

Edward released a heavy breath. "I don't know, man."

"Can I help?"

"You just did," he said. "Seriously. I'll be fine. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Sure," Jasper said, huffing slightly. "If you ever decide to tell me what's going on, I'll be around."

"I know, Jasper," Edward replied quietly. "I'm just…dealing with some stuff. Really. I'll be fine."

"Okay," Jasper said slowly, evidently not buying it.

"Bye, Jasper…and thanks."

"No problem."

Edward hung up the phone and walked back over to add a little diamond to Bella's bracelet.

~0~

"I have something for you," Edward said enthusiastically when Bella walked in the door. It was late and the kids were in bed, but he was so excited about his gift he couldn't sleep. He waited in the living room, listening for the sound of the minivan pulling into the driveway. When he finally heard it, he was nearly vibrating with excitement. He felt confident that his thoughtful gift would get him back in Bella's good graces.

Bella yawned in the entryway, tugging her coat from her shoulders tiredly. "Something for me?"

Edward jumped up to help her with her coat. "You look exhausted," he said. "How was the seminar?"

Bella smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. Apparently their argument from the night before hadn't been forgotten. "It was great," she said quietly. "James McKay is an amazing writer, and I learned a lot from him. He's actually going to be teaching a writing class in Port Angeles that starts in a couple of weeks. He suggested I take it." She watched Edward closely, gauging his reaction.

Edward smiled at her. "That's fantastic. I think you should do it."

"You do?"

Edward felt mystified and a little ashamed at the shock in her voice. Did she really think he'd fight her on this? Obviously, in the past he would have. He found himself growing increasingly irritated with his alter ego.

_What an asshole_.

"You didn't even ask how much it would cost," she said.

"We'll make it work." Edward shrugged, as if the money were no big deal.

"It'll be two nights a week for a month," she added. "I'd drive up right after work and you'd have to handle the kids…dinner…baths…bed…all of it."

"I can do that."

"Wow," Bella said, a smile lighting her face. "Who are you, and what have you done with Edward?"

Edward laughed, pulling her to the couch. "I just want you to know that I support you in whatever you do," he said earnestly. "I love you, Bella…and I'm sorry about last night…about everything."

Bella felt tears prick her eyes. "I'm sorry too."

Edward picked up the gift wrapped box from where it lay on the coffee table. "I got this for you today," he said. "I wanted you to know how important you are to me, Bella. I know I haven't shown it much lately, but things have really changed…_I've_ changed. I want…I _need_ for you to understand that things will be different from now on."

He handed her the little box and she took it slowly, running her fingers over the gold ribbon. "It's so pretty," she said quietly.

"Open it."

Her eyes flashed to his briefly before returning to the box. She tugged on the bow, pulling it from the box, then slid her finger under the wrapping to remove it. She hesitated slightly before lifting the lid.

"Oh, Edward," she breathed, lifting it from the box and studying the little heart-shaped charm that now said _Bella_ in elegant script, accented by two little gemstones.

"They're the kids' birthstones," he pointed out.

Bella nodded. "I see that. It's…it's beautiful, Edward…but…it's too much. How can we afford this?" She lifted her hesitant gaze to his.

Edward waved off her concerns. "Don't worry about it."

Bella's brow creased. "But, Edward…after last night…the helicopter ride and dinner…and that hotel suite, and now this. It had to cost a fortune."

He leaned in and kissed her forehead indulgently. "I said, don't worry about it," he repeated.

Bella's face tensed. "But where is the money coming from?"

Edward felt a twinge of irritation. "Bella, can't you just enjoy the gift? Why are you making such a big deal about this? I've got it covered. Can't you just trust me?"

Bella frowned for a moment, biting her lip. "Of course, I trust you," she said finally, worry still evident on her face. "It's a beautiful bracelet, Edward. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

She put the lid back on the box. She didn't say anything more about the money, but Edward could sense the issue wasn't settled.

"I'm really tired," she said, standing up slowly and not meeting his eyes. "The kids will be up early tomorrow. I'm going to go to bed."

Edward waited for her to invite him to go with her, but she didn't. Instead, she leaned over to kiss him softly on the cheek.

"Thank you again," she said politely. "Good night."

"Good night," Edward replied, trying to hide his disappointment. He'd been so hopeful that the bracelet would help him turn a corner with Bella, but he had the strangest feeling that it might have actually made things worse. He slipped off his shoes, stretching out on the sofa, then sitting up again to pull his wallet and keys from his pocket. When he saw the little silver bell resting in his palm, he considered it carefully.

Michael had told him only to use it for emergencies. He wondered if not knowing what was going through his wife's mind would qualify.

Or an epic case of sexual frustration.

Or a desire to sleep on a real bed instead of a lumpy sofa.

He looked at the bell for a long time, weighing the pros and cons of ringing it and maybe getting a few answers to help him along the way. But, he couldn't fight the feeling that maybe he needed to hold off…that he might need Michael more at another time and he needed to save his last two bell rings for even more desperate times.

His heart sank at the thought that things could get worse.

Finally, he opened a drawer in the side table, depositing his wallet, keys, and the bell inside and closing it quietly.

He'd keep at it, for now, and try to find his way on his own.

The bell was always there if he needed it.

* * *

**A/N: **Many thanks to Sue at So You Think You Can Write, who recently interviewed me about Do Over and what inspired me to write it. If you'd like to read the interview it's here: sytycw . blogspot . com/2010/12/sues-interview-with-tkegl-about-her-fic . html?zx=e9178d9eee6c8a09

Next update tomorrow…


	11. Chapter 11  There's Always Tomorrow

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:** Oh, so many of you are right on target…both with what Bella and Edward are going through, and what's going to happen next…

**Chapter 11 – There's Always Tomorrow**

The sun was just coming up when Edward awakened. He lay on the couch in the quiet house, listening for the noise that had roused him. He was certain he'd heard something, although in his sleep-slowed mind, he couldn't figure out what it was.

Then he heard it again. A muffled whine…or sob. Coming from down the hall.

Thinking maybe one of the kids had had a bad dream, he got up from the couch and followed the sound. As he walked out of the living room, he noticed a dim light coming from the office, and realized that was also where the noises were coming from.

He froze. Someone was crying.

His stockinged feet were silent on the floor as he neared the cracked door. Listening closely, he peered through the small opening, only to see Bella sitting at the desk facing the computer screen. She was turned away from him, so he could only see the side of her face, but as she sniffed and wiped a hand across her cheek, he realized she was crying.

"Bella?" He pushed the door open, taking a few steps into the room. "What's wrong?"

Bella spun around in surprise, jumping to her feet. "I didn't hear you there."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Edward said, taking a step toward her, and stopping at the look of misery on her face. "What is it?"

Bella's face hardened slightly, but the tears continued to roll down her cheeks. Edward tried to look around her at the computer screen to see what she was doing, but he couldn't quite make it out.

"I couldn't sleep," she said, her voice raspy. "I came down here and thought I'd get a little work done. I found an e-mail from our car insurance company. You know how we have it set up for automatic payments from our credit card, then I pay the card off every month?" 

Edward felt his stomach tighten. He didn't like where this was going.

"Well, apparently this month's payment was rejected," Bella continued, her voice not accusatory, but kind of empty. "I thought it must be some kind of mistake, so I logged on to our Visa account. The card is maxed out, Edward."

Edward swallowed thickly. "It's really not that big a deal—"

Bella continued as if he hadn't spoken, her eyes still bright with tears. "So, just on a hunch, I checked our other cards. Can you guess what I found?"

"Bella…"

"A little over three-thousand dollars, Edward," she said. "Three-thousand dollars in less than a week."

Edward cleared his throat. "Well, I had to pay Waylon for fuel…and then there was the rental car…"

"We worked so hard to pay those off, Edward," Bella continued, shaking her head as if dazed. "After we had to have the roof replaced. Do you remember? We paid all that interest, and once we got out from under that debt, we decided _together_ that we'd keep our credit limits low and pay the cards off every month…and that we'd decide _together_ before using them for any major purchases.

"Bella, I'll take care of it."

"How, Edward?" she asked, anger beginning to tint her voice. "We barely make enough between us to pay the mortgage and our regular bills. How are we going to find another three-thousand dollars?"

Edward ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "I'll find a way. You don't have to worry about it."

"Don't tell me not to worry about it!" Bella shouted, before taking a breath to calm herself. "This affects _both_ of us, Edward. Those cards are _ours_. The debt is _ours_. You can't just tell me to not worry about it."

Edward felt his eyes narrow. "And _I'm_ telling _you_ I'll take care of it. I caused the problem and I'll fix it."

Bella collapsed back into her chair. "You just don't get it, do you?" At his blank look, she continued, "We used to be a team. We used to be partners. We're supposed to face things like this together. I've said it over and over again but you never hear me."

Edward collapsed onto a chair. "I just wanted you to have a special night…to have some nice things." 

"God, Edward," Bella rubbed her eyes. "I don't need _things._ I just need _you_. I need _us._" She turned to the computer screen, closing windows and shutting everything down. "I have to get to the bank when it opens," she said. "I'm going to try and figure out what to do about the insurance payment."

"I can help," Edward offered. 

"I think it would be better if you stayed here," Bella countered. "The kids will be up soon." She hesitated, not meeting his eyes. "And I think it might be better if you stayed at Jasper's for a little while."

"Bella, no," Edward murmured, a wave of panic washing through him.

"I just need some time," she said quietly. "We both need some time, I think, to cool off and get our heads straight."

"Bella, don't do this."

"I'm not doing anything, Edward," she said firmly, her hurt brown gaze meeting his. "I'm asking you to give me some time. Please."

Edward stared at her for a moment before nodding slowly. "Okay."

Bella gathered up some papers and walked out of the office. A few minutes later Edward heard the sound of the front door closing, followed by the rumble of the minivan's engine as Bella pulled out of the driveway. He walked over and sat down, his face falling into his hands.

How had this happened? He had such grand plans, and the best of intentions, but – like an idiot – he didn't think it through. He never considered that his spending might actually put a financial hardship on his family. Over the past few years, money hadn't really been an issue for him, but now he kicked himself for not thinking about the consequences of his actions.

He owned a little start-up newspaper in a tiny town. His wife was a school teacher. They had two kids. And it never occurred to him that spending a thousand dollars on a new suit might not be the best idea?

_Idiot._

Edward tugged at his hair. He couldn't blame Bella for being angry and upset, but he was also starting to feel more than a little frustrated. He really didn't have a clue what was going on – although with every passing moment he was starting to get a better idea – and he was getting tired of paying for mistakes that someone else had made – the _other_ Edward. The one who he was beginning to think didn't even deserve Bella…or this life.

At the same time, he felt a niggling sense of guilt. Because the fact was, the _other_ Edward _was_ him. The _him_ he would have been if he'd made the choices that _that_ Edward had made. Sure, he could judge that Edward now, from where he stood as an outsider looking in, but in reality he knew he was judging himself. He was getting a glimpse of who he would have been had he made different choices in the past and, to be completely honest, he wasn't too happy with what he saw.

He had no idea what to do about it, though, and he was beginning to think it was time to ask for help.

Edward stood abruptly and walked back into the living room. The sun was up and he could hear the kids moving around upstairs. He went to the side table and pulled the drawer open, taking out his wallet and keys and shifting some papers around as he searched for the little silver bell.

It was gone.

"Oh no," he muttered, pulling everything out of the drawer and setting it on the floor. He even removed the drawer, shaking it upside down before getting down on his knees to search under the table and sofa.

Where was it?

"No…no…no…" he chanted, sitting on the floor with his back against the sofa, his knees bent and his head cradled in his arm. "What the hell am I going to do now?"

"Daddy?" A little voice drew him from his agonized thoughts. He looked up to see Masen standing in front of him, his little face red and tear-stained.

The bell forgotten for the moment, Edward reached for his son. "Masen? What's wrong buddy?"

The little boy's lip trembled. "I'm sorry, Daddy. I did something bad."

Edward ran his hand over the boy's sweat-dampened hair. "It can't be that bad, Masen. Why don't you tell me what happened?"

Masen's head fell. "I…uh…I took your bell."

"You took it?"

"I was looking for my Hot Wheels fire truck and I saw it in the drawer," Masen said in a rush of words. "I'm sorry, Daddy."

Edward felt a surge of relief. "Well, just give it back, buddy. It's okay." He held out his hand and Masen slowly lifted a chubby hand, dropping the bell into Edward's outstretched palm. A curious thought popped into Edward's mind. "Masen, how did you know it was mine?"

Masen bit his lip before whispering, "The angel told me."

Edward chilled slightly. "Angel? Do you mean…? Did you…? Masen, did you ring the bell?"

Masen just nodded his head.

"And you saw…Michael?"

Masen nodded again.

"Did you talk to him?"

Masen smiled slightly. "He said I shouldn't have taken the bell, but he said you'd forgive me if I said I was sorry."

"What else did he say? Did he say anything else about me?"

Masen bit his lip as he thought. "He told me to tell you, 'That's two.'"

_That's two. _Edward had lost one of his chances to summon Michael for help. He felt a surge of frustration that he'd be held accountable for Masen ringing the bell, but just as quickly he had to concede that it was his own fault for not keeping the bell on him. He realized his son was watching him warily, most likely still wondering if he was going to get in trouble. Edward smiled, pulling him onto his lap. 

"Masen, why did you say that Michael was an angel?"

Masen snuggled into his father's chest. "'Cause of his wings."

"He had wings?"

"Yeah," Masen breathed. "Big white ones." He waved his hands in a big sweeping arc to emphasize his words. "He said most people can't see them, but kids see better than grownups sometimes."

Edward chuckled. "I guess that's true. Did he say anything else?"

Masen nodded against Edward's chest. "I didn't understand it, though."

"What did he say?"

Masen sat up, staring at Edward, his brow creasing as he concentrated. "He said, 'Tell your daddy he has to listen carefully, but not just with his ears…he has to listen with his heart.'

"That doesn't make sense, does it daddy? How can you listen with your heart?"

Edward pulled his son close, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "I'll have to think about that one, buddy," he said.

And he did. As he got the kids dressed and ready for the day…as he fed them breakfast…as he packed a bag to take to Jasper's…and as he passed Bella's sad eyes on his way out the door once she got home. She told him she'd managed to get the insurance paid for this month, but they'd have to figure out the credit card problem over the next few days.

Edward had just nodded and told her once again that he was sorry.

He knew it wasn't that simple, though.

However, he was also beginning to realize that maybe it wasn't as _complicated_ as he thought. Michael had told him to listen. It was something he really hadn't done much of since he'd arrived in this rather strange life. He thought he knew what Bella wanted…what she needed…but he never really listened when she told him herself.

_What's important to me doesn't even matter to you._

_We used to be a team._ _We used to be partners. _

_We're supposed to face things like this together. _

_I've said it over and over again but you never hear me._

_I don't need things. I just need you. I need us._

Could it be that all Bella wanted was for him to be _with_ her? To _listen_ to her? To support and encourage her? Could it really be that simple?

Edward had been so busy trying to show Bella that she was important to him by giving her _things_, that he didn't even think about just giving her _himself_.

He could do it.

As he drove to Jasper's house, he made a promise to himself. The _other_ Edward may have taken his wife and family for granted, but _he_ would not. He was going to do whatever it took to make Bella realize that he did respect and support her. She would know without a shadow of a doubt that he loved her and the kids…and that they were more important to him than any job or missed opportunity.

He would find a way to fix the problem he'd created with the credit cards – he felt he owed Bella that much. He'd make sure she took the writing class that was so important to her…and he'd find little ways – _inexpensive_ ways – to show her how much he cared.

He'd screwed up, but Edward Cullen was a man who learned from his mistakes.

And there was no way in hell he was losing Bella again.

**A/N: **So it appears our Edward has learned a little something… finally! Looks like we're turning a corner…


	12. Chapter 12  Auld Lang Syne

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 12 – Auld Lang Syne**

Edward spent New Year's Eve sitting on Jasper's couch eating leftover Chinese food and watching the ball drop in Times Square on TV. Jasper and Alice had tried to lure him out to the celebration at The Lodge, but he'd declined. After spending the day with Bella and the kids, he'd returned to Jasper's alone.

He sighed slightly as the crowd in Times Square shouted out the countdown, but refused to give in to despair.

He was making progress. It was slow. But it was progress.

It started the day he left home. After checking in with Shelly, he'd gone by the bank and spent some time trying to come up with a way to deal with the credit card problem he'd caused. It was no big surprise – although he wished he'd realized it sooner – that he and Bella were not rolling in the dough. Between the two of them, they managed to pay their bills and really had very little debt, other than a car payment and the credit cards – the balance of which Edward had managed to almost double with his two-day spending frenzy.

Edward vowed at that moment not to wallow in his mistakes. Instead, he went back to the house in the guise of having forgotten something, and searched through his dresser drawers for a couple of items he was certain he would still have – regardless of the reality he might find himself in.

When his hand closed on the velvet box tucked under his rolled-up socks, Edward breathed a sigh of relief as he recognized it immediately. Before she died, his grandmother had given him the box, telling him to use the contents however he saw fit. He'd always kept it. Even in his other life the box was always tucked deep in his duffle bag. He opened the box, categorizing the items inside quickly. Flipping it shut, he slid it into his coat pocket. He'd have to decide later what he would keep, and what he would sell.

Edward had left the house and gone straight to the office. The paper would go to print the next day, so he had to go over the layout and make sure everything was ready on time. The morning passed in a blur of e-mails and phone calls, as well as frantic knocks on his office door by his assistant editor, Ben Cheney. It had been a while since he'd worked on a print publication, so he was grateful for the young man's knowledge and enthusiasm.

During a lull in activity, Edward pulled the box from his pocket and studied the items nestled against the black velvet. Two sets of gold cufflinks winked back at him. One pair was oval-shaped with lapis set in the gold, a thin gold band crossing over the blue stone. The others were jade, slightly smaller, with a twisted gold border. Both dated back to the early twentieth century and Edward knew collectors would go crazy over them. Over the years he'd had them appraised, and there was one antique dealer in Seattle who had called him every few years wondering if he'd be willing to sell.

He was now.

The pocket watch was older – dating back to the Civil War. It had been his great-grandfather's, and Edward really hoped it wouldn't be necessary to sell it as well. Of the items in the box, it held the most sentimental value. One of his earliest memories was sitting on his grandfather's lap and watching him wind the old pocket watch carefully.

"Time's the only thing you can never get enough of," he'd told young Edward. "So it's best to use it wisely."

It was a lesson Edward was still learning.

With a little Googling, Edward managed to track down the antique dealer he was looking for. Of course, the man had no idea who Edward was, but when Edward described the items in his possession – and subsequently e-mailed pictures of all of them – the dealer had been very interested.

The next day, with the paper put to bed, Edward worked with Shelly to assign the day's stories, then took off for the three-hour trip to Seattle. He spent the time in the car thinking about what he'd learned about Bella so far.

She'd become a teacher, but the writing seminar proved that she hadn't given up on her dream of writing. It had evidently been put on the back burner for a while – a long while, apparently. From what Jasper had told him, and what he'd gleaned from Bella herself, Edward hadn't done much to encourage her to pursue that dream.

Edward planned to change that. He knew first-hand the extent of Bella's talent and he understood that she had what it took to be an amazing author. She just had to believe it herself, know that _he_ believed it, and have the opportunity to go after it.

He also knew that his alter ego had dwelled on the missed opportunities that came with giving up the internship in New York. Edward, however, knew that what he'd given up was nothing compared to what he'd gained in this alternate reality.

If hindsight was 20/20, what Edward had was even clearer – maybe super-magnification or x-ray vision.

Sure, his career had been rewarding, to a certain extent, but tracking war and famine had already begun to drain him…harden him. And even a cushy network news spot didn't compare to his newfound family.

He'd choose Bella in a second.

He just had to convince her of that, undo a decade of resentment and regret, and show her that he really did appreciate and love the life that he had now.

Which led to the biggest challenge for him – remembering that he and Bella were partners. Edward had lived on his own for so long it was difficult for him to remember that he and Bella needed to make decisions together. It chafed a little, if he were to be completely honest. To have to run things by someone else smacked a little of asking permission.

But he knew from watching his own parents, that it was essential for any marriage to work. It was just something he needed to get used to. And he knew he would do it. He'd do whatever it took.

As the Seattle skyline appeared on the horizon, Edward felt a wave of hope rush through him. He may not have known all the details of what led Bella and the _other _Edward to this point, but it didn't matter.

It was about moving forward now. And Edward had a plan.

He met with the antique dealer, and after some fierce negotiations, said goodbye to his grandfather's cufflinks and hello to enough cash to pay off the credit cards, plus a little extra. Edward drove home with a smile on his face and a nice check in his pocket.

He'd been able to keep the pocket watch, although he would have parted with it in a second if he needed to. He was quickly learning that he'd do about anything if he needed to – anything that could help fix things with Bella and get him back with his family.

What were a set of cufflinks compared to that?

Edward didn't get back to Forks until after dark and knew he'd have to wait until the next day to see Bella. He'd shared a late dinner with Jasper and Alice and slept comfortably for the first time since he'd gotten to Forks – even though he was still on the couch.

"Got a minute?" Edward stood on his front porch the next morning, facing Bella, who was watching him hesitantly. "I'd like to talk to you about something."

Bella nodded and stepped back from the door. "Would you like something to drink?"

It was something you'd ask a guest. Edward didn't like feeling like a guest here. He wanted this to be his home.

"No, thank you," he said politely, hiding his reaction to Bella's offer. "Maybe we could sit down?"

He followed her into the living room, sitting on the sofa and trying not to frown when she sat on a chair across from him, rather than next to him.

"Where are the kids?" he asked.

"Your mom took them to the indoor play park," she replied. "You know how she loves to spoil them."

They exchanged small smiles and the air thickened with tension.

"So," Edward began, breaking the silence. "I know that we're supposed to make financial decisions together, but I did feel like I needed to deal with the credit card situation, since I'm the one that caused it."

Bella blinked in surprise, obviously not expecting him to say that. Edward handed her a sheet of paper with a smile.

Bella looked down at the statement from the bank. "I…I don't understand. It's paid off?"

Edward nodded, leaning forward to rest his arms on his knees. "They all are. Except for the house and the minivan we are now debt free."

"But…but how?"

Edward shrugged. "I sold my grandfather's cufflinks."

Bella gasped. "Edward, you didn't! You love those!"

Edward just tilted his head, smiling softly. "I love you more."

"But…" Her face flushed as she looked down at the credit card statement again. "Oh, Edward…we could have found another way."

"There wasn't another way, Bella. You know that."

"I just hate that you had to do it."

"I don't." At her surprised look, Edward added, "They're just _things_, Bella. I don't need things. I need _you_. I need _us_." He smiled at the recognition in her eyes when she realized he was using her words. He crossed over to her, dropping to his knees and taking her hands.

"Bella, I know things haven't been right between us for a while," he said earnestly. "To be perfectly honest, I don't completely understand where we went wrong."

Bella started to speak, but Edward held up a hand to silence her. "Please, just let me say this?" She nodded and he continued. "Anyway, it doesn't matter, really. I don't want to rehash the past. I want us to start fresh, right now. I want us to get to know each other again…to fall in love again. I'm just asking for a chance to build a new life with you, Bella…with you and the kids. It's all that matters to me now.

"I know what it's like to live without you," he said, his voice catching when he saw tears begin to glisten in Bella's eyes. "That's not a life I want."

Bella swallowed thickly. "Me neither."

Edward felt a surge of hope. "Okay, then…give us a chance," he said in a rush. "I'm not talking about me coming home…not just yet. I'm talking about us spending time together. I'm asking for you to give us another chance…give me another chance. Don't give up on us just yet, Bella. Can you do that? Just…give us some time?"

She reached out to touch his hair, tears trickling down her cheeks. "Yes."

A sunny smile split Edward's face and he leaned forward to kiss her softly…chastely. "Okay, then," he said, using his thumbs to brush the tears from her face. "I…uh…I should go, but maybe I could come by tomorrow? We could take the kids to the beach if the weather's not too bad."

Bella's face lit up. "That would be really great." She hesitated before asking, "Are you going out with the guys tomorrow night for New Year's?"

"The guys?"

"From work?"

"Why would I spend New Year's Eve with them?"

Bella's brow creased in confusion. "You always spend it with them."

"I do?"

"Edward, are you okay?" Bella finally asked. "I mean, not that I'm complaining, but you're acting kind of…weird."

Edward missed the question, because something finally clicked. "Bella, was I with the guys on Christmas Eve?"

Bella's face blanched. "I thought we weren't going to talk about the past."

"I was, wasn't I," he said half to himself. "How much time do I spend going out drinking with the guys?"

Bella shrugged. "You need the time away to relax," she replied, obviously quoting an often-heard statement.

"God, I'm such an asshole," Edward muttered.

"Edward?" Bella was looking at him with concern in her eyes. "What's the matter with you?"

"Good question," he grumbled, his head sagging forward for a moment before he looked back up at her. "Look, Bella. I'm done with all of that. I don't need time away to relax." He used air quotes to accentuate his contempt for the phrase. "I'm here for you and the kids. All in. We'll hang out tomorrow and if you want to go out for New Year's Eve, I'll take you."

Bella frowned. "I'm not really feeling up to it, to be honest."

Edward smirked. "Well, me neither…to be honest. So we'll have a good day and an early night. How does that sound?"

Bella smiled. "It sounds perfect. Then, you'll be here for football, right?"

Edward didn't miss a beat. His family had always spent New Year's Day in front of the TV watching bowl game after bowl game. It was something he'd come to miss since he'd left Forks.

"Of course, what time?"

"Oh, whenever. I'll be up early cooking," Bella replied.

"I'll come by to help."

"Really?" she laughed. "You want to help cook?"

Edward grinned. "Well, maybe not _cook_, but I can chop and stir with the best of them."

Bella stared at him for a moment, then she shook her head slowly. "I can't put my finger on it," she said. "But there's something…different…about you, isn't there?"

Edward stood, running his hand through his hair. "Yeah. There is."

"What happened?"

Edward reached down to pull Bella to her feet, then wrapped her in a gentle hug. "I've been given a second chance," he said quietly into her hair, "and I'm going to make the most of it."

* * *

**A/N: **We're getting there folks… it looks like Edward's finally figuring some things out. And don't be too hard on Bella…it takes time to heal these things sometimes. She'll come around, I promise.

I just found out that my story **Beyond Time** has been nominated for the **Twinklings Walk of Fame**. It's nominated for the** Cosplay Queen Award** for best period fic. More info. can be found here: twinklingswfa . blogspot . com. Voting isn't open yet, though. Thanks to whoever nominated **BT**!


	13. Chapter 13  Do You Know What I Know?

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 13 – Do You Know What I Know?**

Edward was up with the sun on New Year's Day. He was so excited about how well things had gone with Bella that he just couldn't stay in bed.

Or…on the couch, as the case may be.

So, he was up early, quietly folding his blankets and making coffee for Jasper and Alice. His sister stumbled into the kitchen shortly after seven, her eyes bleary and her hands reaching desperately for the coffee pot. Edward chuckled lightly and poured her a cup. Alice was never one to sleep in. Even when hungover she rarely stayed in bed past eight.

"Jasper still sleeping?" Edward asked, sipping at his coffee and pushing a bag of bagels toward Alice. She frowned and pushed them back, turning to search for a bottle of aspirin in the cabinet.

"Yeah," she said on a yawn, popping the aspirin dry and chasing it with a gulp of coffee. "You should have come with us last night. We had a blast. Emmett and Rosalie were there, and you remember that guy Tyler Crowley from high school?" At Edward's nod she continued. "He was back in town visiting, and Emmett caught him getting a beej in the coat closet from one of the waiters."

Edward laughed. "No way."

"Way," Alice confirmed, sitting back down at the table. "I think the waiter got fired, but he went home with Tyler, so I guess it's all good."

"Sounds like a great time," Edward said with a grin.

Alice eyed him closely. "You really stayed in last night?"

Edward nodded. "Yeah, I was pretty beat after chasing the kids up and down First Beach all day." At Alice's silent perusal, he asked, "What?"

She shook her head slightly. "Nothing…it's just…you're usually not one to turn down a party."

Edward grimaced. "Yeah, so I gather."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Alice looked at him in confusion.

"Nothing. I've just decided to make some changes, that's all."

Alice continued to stare at him for a long moment. Edward shifted uncomfortably, swirling the cooling coffee in his cup. His sister had always had a kind of sixth sense about people – an insight that was at times downright eerie. He felt like she was looking into his soul at that moment.

"What's going on with you, Edward?" she asked quietly.

Edward laughed. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

Alice propped her chin on her fists, her gaze unwavering. "Try me."

Edward's smile fell as he considered Alice's words. What did he really have to lose?

"I'm not the Edward you know," he said finally.

"What do you mean?"

Edward took a deep breath. "I mean, this…" He waved his hands to indicate his surroundings. "…all of this…this world. It's not mine. I came from another world…another reality."

He proceeded to tell Alice about the events that led up to his arrival on her couch on Christmas morning. To his surprise, she said nothing while he talked. She didn't interrupt or comment. She just listened.

When he finished, he looked her in the eye, waiting for her reaction.

"So," she said, tugging on her ear as she often did when thinking deeply about something, "you're saying in your world you never asked Bella to marry you?"

"Nope."

"And you guys broke up. You never saw each other again?"

"Not until Christmas Eve when I saw her at the party."

Alice took a sip of her coffee, frowning absently at the cold, bitter liquid. "So that's why you're so different. And why you're so determined to fix things with Bella."

Edward just nodded. "It sounds crazy, I know."

Alice chuckled. "Yeah. That's putting it mildly. It's like an episode of _The Twilight Zone._"

Edward met his sister's gaze. "But you believe me."

Alice shrugged. "Something's definitely happened to you…and I've never known you to lie to me. Crazy things happen in the world all the time – who am I to say what's possible and what isn't?"

Suddenly overcome with emotion, Edward shot to his feet and hugged Alice tightly. "Thanks."

She wrapped her tiny arms around her brother. "No problem," she replied. "But, Edward?"

"Yeah?"

"I wouldn't mention this to anyone else," she suggested. "I'd hate to only see you during visiting hours at the asylum."

Edward laughed humorlessly. "Yeah. The thought did cross my mind."

"So what are you going to do now?" she asked.

"Win Bella back."

"You make it sound so simple," she said.

Edward released her and returned to his seat. "Well, I have some help now, right?"

Alice grinned. "You know I'll do whatever I can."

~0~

Edward showed up on Bella's doorstep just after ten o'clock, clutching a bouquet of brightly colored daisies and a case of beer from the corner grocery store. Bella had blushed at the offering, but seemed to like the flowers even more than the roses he'd given her before.

She'd quickly put him to work chopping vegetables for a thick beef stew and Edward enjoyed the quiet camaraderie as they worked, the kids coloring at the breakfast bar. Masen was uncharacteristically quiet, and Edward found himself watching the boy in concern.

"Masen," he asked finally, "you feeling okay, buddy?"

His son just shrugged. Bella leaned across the breakfast bar to press her cheek to his forehead.

"You don't have a fever," she murmured. "Does your tummy hurt?"

He shook his head, scratching his crayon across the page, covering it in thick black lines.

"What's wrong, Masen?" Edward asked, fear and concern twisting in his stomach.

The little boy looked up from his picture, his eyes glistening with tears. "Are you getting a divorce?" he asked.

"What's a divorce?" Makenna piped up.

Edward turned panicked eyes to Bella, who in turn swept Makenna up into her arms. "Hey, let's go see if we can find the football platters in the garage. Can you come help Mommy?"

Sufficiently distracted, Makenna nodded, wiggling out of Bella's grip and running toward the garage.

Which left Edward to deal with Masen's question.

"Why would you ask that, buddy?" Edward sat down next to Masen, reaching out to push his hair back from his forehead.

"Because you don't sleep here anymore," he said through tearful hiccups. "Tanner's daddy stopped sleeping at his house and now his mommy and daddy are divorced and Tanner only sees his daddy on the weekends. And not even _all _the weekends…only _some_ of them."

Edward took a deep breath and pulled the crying little boy into his lap. "Shhhh…" he murmured, rubbing Masen's back gently. When the worst of the sobbing had subsided, Edward turned his son slightly so he could look him in the eye.

"Let me ask you something, Masen," he said. "Have I ever lied to you?" He held his breath waiting for the answer, hoping he wouldn't regret asking the question.

Masen rubbed his fist under his nose. "No."

Edward smiled. "Well, then you know you can believe me when I tell you that no matter where I sleep, I will always be here for you. You and Makenna and Mommy are the most important people in the world to me."

Masen blinked up at him innocently. "Really?''

"Really," he said firmly. "We spent the whole day together at the beach yesterday, right?"

Masen grinned. "That was fun. I got you so wet!"

Edward ruffled his son's hair. "Yeah, you did…and I'll be here all day today, too. And if you ever need me, and I'm not around, you just pick up the phone and call me."

"Even at work?" Masen asked doubtfully.

"Any time," Edward told him.

Masen was silent for a moment. "So you're not going to get a divorce?" he asked hopefully.

Edward hesitated. He wanted to calm his son's fears, but could he promise him that? Sure, things were looking better with Bella, and if it were up to him, divorce would be out of the question.

But it wasn't entirely up to him.

"No." Bella's quiet voice carried from the doorway. She crossed the room, setting an armful of platters on the counter before sitting next to Edward and Masen. Her eyes were on Edward's when she said simply, "No divorce."

"Really?" Masen and Edward said simultaneously.

Bella nodded, her attention focusing on her son. "Mommy and Daddy are just having a time out," she explained, reaching out to touch his cheek. "We haven't been treating each other very nicely, but we want to do better."

Masen looked back and forth between his parents for a moment. "I didn't know grownups got time-outs," he said.

"We need them sometimes," Bella admitted.

"You should be nice," he admonished, turning to his father.

Bella and Edward exchanged a smile. "You're right," Edward replied, "and we're working on it, but you don't have to worry, Masen. We'll both always be close by when you need us."

Masen silently absorbed that, then slid down off of Edward's lap quickly. "Okay," he said brightly. "Can I go watch Spongebob now?

Edward was a little stunned by the quick change of topic, but Bella took it all in stride. "Makenna's watching Dora," she told him. "But when it's over, you can put Spongebob in, okay?"

Masen agreed with a smile, running out of the room.

The rest of the day was relaxed and comfortable, and Edward basked in the feeling of being surrounded by family. His parents were there, as well as Charlie, who took up residence on one of the recliners and only got up to get food or run to the bathroom between plays. Alice and Jasper and Emmett and Rosalie arrived together, and the house was filled with cheers and boos, and the sounds of the children playing.

Edward loved every minute of it.

After everyone left, Edward stayed behind to help Bella clean up. Once the leftovers had been packed away and all the dishes were washed, he helped put the kids to bed, then grabbed his coat and headed for the door.

"Edward," Bella began nervously as he reached for the doorknob. He had a feeling she was going to invite him to stay, but after a moment, she said instead, "Thank you…for all your help today."

Edward smiled, leaning in to kiss her cheek lightly. He was determined not to push things with Bella. He was going to take it slow…let her learn to trust him again…woo her. He was pretty sure he could still woo with the best of them.

"No problem," he said. "Happy to do it. Good night, Bella."

"Night."

Edward walked to his car with a skip in his step, and when he lay down on Jasper's sofa, he couldn't keep the smile off his face.

~0~

True to her word, Alice was definitely in Edward's corner over the coming weeks. She'd often accompany Edward over to the house, offering to sit with the kids so the two of them could go for a walk or get a cup of coffee.

Twice a week, Edward would leave the paper early so he could pick up the kids and Bella could go to her writing class in Port Angeles. It took a little schedule-shifting, but with Shelly's help, he managed to work it out, and was able to get caught up when the kids were in bed. Edward was a little surprised at how much he enjoyed the one-on-one time with his children. As he got to know them, he found himself falling even more in love with them. He longed to move back home, but he was determined that it would be Bella's decision when that would happen.

He continued to look for little ways to make Bella feel special – whether it was bringing her more flowers, or one of the cinnamon rolls from The Lodge that she loved so much. He'd taken to dropping by the house before work a few days a week to take the kids to school and daycare. It gave Bella a little time to relax before heading to work and she really seemed to appreciate the gesture.

One day he picked up a pizza from Chicago Ru's and surprised Bella at school. The smile on her face when he showed up at her classroom door warmed Edward's heart. Even though Bella only had a half an hour for lunch, they'd spent it sitting in his car eating pizza and laughing.

"How's the writing class going?" Edward asked through a mouthful of cheese.

Bella blushed and reached out to wipe a smudge of sauce from his cheek. "It's good," she said. "James says I have some real talent."

"He's right."

Bella picked at her pizza. "You really think so?"

Edward smiled at her. "I know so. You're an amazing writer."

Bella looked away, obviously embarrassed by the praise. "There's…uh…going to be a poetry reading on the last night of class," she said hesitantly, her face reddening. "It's no big deal. We're just all going to share some of the stuff we've written."

"When?" Edward asked.

"The twenty-seventh," she replied. "It's up in Port Angeles, so if you can't make it, I totally understand."

"I'll be there."

She smiled at him. "Are you sure?"

Edward set his pizza down, wiping his hands before tucking her hair behind her ear. "I wouldn't miss it. I'm sure my mom or Alice will watch the kids."

"That really means a lot to me, Edward. Thank you."

"Well, it's really pretty selfish on my part," he replied, his mouth lifting in a smirk.

"Selfish?"

Edward nodded. "Of course. When you become a rich and famous author, I'll be able to ride on your coattails."

Bella laughed, and before she ran back to her classroom through the drizzly rain, she'd thanked him and leaned over to kiss him softly, her fingers tangled in his hair.

Edward thought it might have been the best meal he'd ever had.

* * *

**A/N: **We're getting close to the end…and for those who are wondering what part Bella played in their marital troubles, she'll answer that soon. Remember, this is really from Edward's perspective, so we have to wait until she feels comfortable enough to open up to him. As for whether Edward will share with Bella what he shared with Alice, well, that remains to be seen.

Should be multiple updates today if I can get my husband to leave me alone long enough to edit and post them! LoL! Thanks for reading!


	14. Chapter 14  Deck the Halls

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 14 – Deck the Halls**

Things were going well.

_Really_ well.

As Edward drove to Port Angeles for Bella's poetry reading, he had high hopes that things would be even better after the coming evening.

He'd once again picked the children up from school and daycare, feeding them an early dinner before Alice came over to stay with them. Bella had left right after school again for her last class, although mainly it would be a celebration of sorts, as well as final preparations for the poetry reading.

"Are you okay, Edward?" Alice asked as she watched him fidget with his tie.

A sheepish grin lit Edward's features. "I guess I'm a little nervous."

Alice crossed to him, straightening his tie and smoothing the shoulders of his suit jacket. "Relax. You'll do fine. I know it means a lot to Bella that you're going to be there.

"And I have a sneaking suspicion you won't be on our couch much longer," she added.

Edward smiled. "You think so?"

Alice patted his cheek lightly. "The past few weeks have been good, right?"

"Yeah," Edward said simply. "They've been really good."

And they had. He and Bella had been spending more time together, both with and without the children. After the pizza lunch at school was so well-received, he began bringing Bella lunch a couple of times a week. He continued to do whatever he could to help out at home, and, although he still slept at Alice and Jasper's, there had been more and more late nights devoted to cuddling in front of the fireplace. He and Bella had yet to have sex, but things were definitely heating up – and he was beginning to feel that he was the one holding back, not Bella.

Edward realized that to her, sex was probably not that big a deal. They had been married for ten years, after all. But for Edward, it had been ten years _since_ he'd slept with Bella.

It was a lot of pressure.

He'd started noticing some changes on Bella's part too. She was smiling more, and he'd sometimes find her humming quietly as she worked in the kitchen or folded laundry. She seemed to take pleasure in doing little things for him as well – like making the stuffed French toast that he loved, or fixing a missing button on his favorite shirt. (He'd found he really did like flannel after all. It was pretty damn comfortable.)

There were other changes also – times he'd turn to find Bella staring at him with a hot look in her eyes. She'd blush and turn away, but Edward could feel the lingering caress of her gaze. He'd done his own share of staring, of course. Bella's body called to him like nothing else…it always had. And with each passing day, he felt the simmering tension heat and he knew the time was drawing near.

Tonight.

He believed…God knew he hoped and prayed it would be tonight.

A guy could only take so much.

"Edward?" Alice's voice jolted him out of his lascivious thoughts. "You still with me?" She laughed, waving a hand in front of his dazed eyes.

Edward smirked and leaned over to his sister's cheek. "Not for long," he said lightly. "I've got to go. Don't want to be late."

~0~

He arrived at the little restaurant about a half an hour early, smiling when he spotted the minivan parked near the rear entrance. Making his way inside he scanned the crowded room for Bella's familiar face. He was a little surprised at how many people had showed up for the reading, but also excited for Bella. It would make the night even more special for her.

He finally spotted her near the stage with a group of people he assumed were her classmates. He waved when he caught her eye, pointing to the table where he was going to sit. He didn't want to interrupt her or make her nervous, but Bella smiled and waved excitedly, practically skipping over to greet him.

"You made it," she said breathlessly.

Edward reached out to tug the ends of her hair playfully. "I told you I wouldn't miss it."

Bella hesitated only briefly before throwing her arms around his neck. "Thanks for coming." Edward encircled her waist, pulling her closer as he nuzzled her neck.

"God, I love you," he murmured quietly.

Bella pulled back, her eyes sparkling. "I love you, too." She bit her lip shyly. "Look, I was going to ask you this later, but now's as good a time as any."

Edward reached up to stroke her cheek. "What is it?"

Bella looked away nervously. "I was thinking maybe it was time for you to come home," she said, her face flushing furiously. "I mean…if you want to."

Her eyes dropped to the floor and Edward's heart melted. "There's no place I would rather be," he replied earnestly.

Bella's head popped back up and a sunny smile lit her face. "Good," she said, "good…that's…that's…"

"Good," Edward concluded with a wry grin.

Bella laughed. "Yeah." She looked over her shoulder. "I have to go sit with my class, but maybe afterward we can have something to eat? Celebrate a little?"

"That would be great," Edward said before leaning in to kiss her softly. He'd intended the kiss to be gentle and chaste, but Bella apparently had other ideas. She twisted her fingers into his hair, pulling him close as she deepened the kiss. Edward's hands clutched at her waist as her tongue plunged into his mouth, and she swallowed his groans as they mingled with her own. When she finally pulled away they were both breathless and warm.

"I have to go," she panted, before leaning in for another kiss.

"Okay," Edward managed to get out before pulling her close again.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." A man speaking from the stage finally managed to break them apart. Edward grinned as Bella blushed prettily, squeezing his hand before returning to her seat across the room.

"It's a very special night here at Riley's," the man continued. "This is the first time we've hosted a poetry reading, and from this turnout, I can tell you it won't be the last."

The room broke out in low chuckles before he continued. "I'd like to introduce you to the man who's made all of this possible, but I know he really needs no introduction. Please welcome, New York Times bestselling author, James McKay!"

Loud applause echoed against the walls as a tall, lanky man with a blonde ponytail made his way to the microphone. He nodded at the crowd, obviously used to the adulation. Edward hadn't read any of his books, but knew that McKay was a successful writer. Of course, in Edward's world, Bella was even more successful.

_Take that, James McKay_, he thought with a slight smirk.

"Thank you," McKay said finally. "Thank you for the warm welcome, and for coming out to support these up and coming writers." He waved a hand toward Bella's table and the applause began again.

The night was entertaining, for the most part. McKay made a point of saying something about each of the students before they took the stage to read their work. Some of it was quite impressive. Some, not so much.

Edward had to swallow his laughter when a middle-aged man named Tony recited a rather graphic poem heralding the advantages of loving a plus-sized woman. When he actually used the phrase, "more cushion for the pushin'" with longing in his voice, Edward cleared his throat to cover his chuckles. As he gazed around the room, he found several other people in the same predicament.

Finally, it was Bella's turn.

"Isabella Swan is a rare talent," McKay said with a fond glance toward Bella.

It almost seemed…_too_ fond.

Edward stiffened, his eyes narrowing.

"She came to me at a seminar I taught in Portland a month ago, and I knew hers was a gift that needed nurturing if it was going to flourish." McKay smiled at Bella, who blushed under the praise. Edward felt an instinctive tightening of his muscles, a primeval craving to protect what was his.

He knew in that instant that James McKay wanted his wife. He felt a rage unlike any he'd ever felt before rear up inside of him, and he clenched his teeth tightly shut, fearing if he didn't that an actual growl would burst through his lips.

He tore his eyes from McKay, no longer listening to what he was saying. He found Bella watching him with concern in her eyes.

Edward took a deep breath. This was an important moment for Bella, and he would not ruin it for her. He forced an encouraging smile, and began to applaud as McKay called her to the microphone. Edward fought to maintain his composure as McKay hugged Bella quickly before leaving the stage.

He'd deal with that guy later.

"Thank you, James," Bella said in a quiet voice, clearing her throat nervously. "And thank all of you for coming. This is a poem I call _Light_. It's…it's for Edward."

Edward blinked in surprise and sat up a little in his chair, all thoughts of James McKay forgotten as Bella unfolded a sheet of paper and began to read.

_Our love began long ago…in the sunrise of our lives_

_When everything was bright and new and filled with warm rosy light_

_We laughed in the heat of our passion and smiles_

_Two moving as one…_

_Living as one…_

_Loving as one._

Her eyes flashed up briefly to catch his, a small smile lighting her face. Edward smiled back, mesmerized by her.

_But all too soon, the light grew dim…as shades and shadows fell_

_A darkness-built wall erected between us, with bricks of indifference and complacency_

_And we were lost_

_Two moving as two…_

_Living as two…_

_Loving…_

_No…not loving._

_Just two._

Edward felt a lump in his throat and he could hear Bella's voice shaking slightly as well, although she kept her eyes firmly focused on the paper. Her fingers gripped the edges of the sheet and she took a deep breath before continuing.

_And yet…_

_The wall, the darkness, was not impenetrable._

_A ray of light shown through…warm and rosy and glowing._

_The light shattered the bricks, one by one grinding them to dust._

_Until all that was left was the intensity of the light's heated rays_

_Glistening and shining on my skin…sparkling in my eyes._

She looked up, tears streaming down her face as she met Edward's gaze. He was surprised to find his cheeks were damp as well. She smiled triumphantly as she read the last line.

_The light was you. _

~0~

Bella stepped down from the stage to hugs from her classmates and resounding applause. Edward continued to clap as he approached her, ignoring the crowd, his eyes focused only on Bella. He came to a stop in front of her, reaching out tentatively, then pulling her close.

"My God, Bella, that was incredible," he murmured in awe.

"You really liked it?" she asked.

Edward released her so he could look in her eyes. "It was beautiful," he said earnestly. "Really, Bella. I loved it."

"Told you so," James McKay said with a wide grin, looping his arm over Bella's shoulders. She shrugged uncomfortably and his arm slipped off. McKay seemed not to notice and tucked it into his pocket instead. "You have real talent, Bella," he said. "You get a manuscript completed and I'm going to set up a meeting with my agent."

"Really?" Bella's eyes widened.

"Absolutely," he said, placing his hands on her shoulders and effectively blocking Edward out. Edward stood close by her side, his fists clenched. "I believe in you, Bella," McKay said, squeezing her shoulders slightly. Edward's eyes narrowed at the movement of the man's fingers. He really didn't want to ruin this moment for Bella, but the guy was crossing a line.

"Thank you, James," Bella said quietly before stepping toward Edward and wrapping her arm around his waist. Once again, McKay's arms fell to his sides and Edward fought a smug grin.

"This is my husband, Edward," Bella told him. "Edward, meet James McKay."

"Ah, the famous Edward," McKay said with a knowing grin. "Almost let this one get away, did you?" He chuckled, but Edward caught the glint in his eye. The glint of challenge. The glint of warning.

"_Almost_ being the key word," Edward said pointedly as he shook the man's hand, a warning of his own in his eyes.

"Well, I need to go mingle," McKay said, ignoring the challenge. "Bella, are you going to stay around for drinks?"

She shook her head. "No, Edward and I are going to have something to eat and then head home. Early day tomorrow."

McKay nodded. "Very well. I'll be in touch," he said, turning to walk to the bar.

"That guy's an ass," Edward muttered without thinking.

"Edward." Bella rolled her eyes. "He's helped me a lot."

"I'm sure he has."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Edward took a deep breath. He really didn't want to get into this now. "Nothing. Let's just get something to eat."

"No, don't do that, Edward," Bella insisted, pulling him over to a quiet table. "If something's bothering you, we need to talk it out."

Edward eyed her carefully. "I just don't want to argue here."

"We don't have to argue," she pointed out. "We could just discuss it."

Edward chuckled humorlessly. "I don't know about that."

Bella smiled. "Try me."

Edward considered it for a moment, then said slowly. "It's McKay. That guy has more on his mind that your writing talent."

Bella blinked in surprise. "You can't be serious."

"I saw how he looks at you, Bella. He's definitely interested."

Bella flushed, her voice trembling slightly. "That's pretty insulting, Edward."

"Insulting?" That was definitely not the response Edward was expecting. "How is that insulting?"

Bella glared. "That you'd think James McKay could only be interested in my body. That there's no way he could actually think I'm a talented writer."

"That's not what I said," Edward fought to keep his voice low. "You _are_ a talented writer. But that's not why he feels it's necessary to keep touching you."

"For God's sake, Edward," Bella groaned. "He's just being friendly."

"That's what they call it now?"

"Edward!"

"No, don't downplay this, Bella," Edward said through gritted teeth. "I'm not being ridiculous. That guy wants you and he's made it very clear he's going to go after you."

"Clear to who?" Bella asked, mystified.

"To me."

She stared at Edward like he'd grown a third head. "What in the world are you talking about?"

"You didn't hear that little 'almost let this one get away' dig?" he asked.

"Really, Edward? That's what all this is about?" Bella gaped. "You don't think maybe you're overreacting just a teensy bit?"

"Don't mock me, Bella." Edward stood up abruptly. "Look, I don't think this is the place for this conversation. Let's just go. We can talk about this at home."

Bella bristled slightly. "What if I'm not ready to go?"

Edward's shoulders fell. "Well, so much for discussing without arguing," he muttered.

At that, Bella exhaled heavily. "I'm sorry. It's my fault. You didn't want to talk about it and I dragged it out of you."

"I didn't really fight you too hard on it," Edward admitted. "The guy seriously pissed me off."

Bella laughed slightly. "Look, I still think you're overreacting…" She held up a hand when Edward opened his mouth to argue, "…_but_ I'm willing to hear you out. You're right, though. This isn't the place.

"Why don't I stay for a bit, say goodbye to my classmates, and pick up some takeout. You can go home and relieve Alice and when I get there we can eat and really have a _discussion._" She emphasized the word and made Edward smile.

"Sounds good, "Edward said before leaning in to kiss her…softly at first, but when he saw McKay watching, he couldn't resist making it a little hotter. He left Bella dazed and breathless and walked to his car with a little spring to his step.

He was almost back to Forks when his phone rang.

Recognizing the number, he answered quickly. "Bella?"

"Edward…uh…something's happened."

"What is it? Are you okay?" He pulled over to the side of the road quickly. "Is there something wrong with the car?"

"No, the car's fine," she replied. "I'm fine…it's just…"

"Bella, what is it?"

"Remember – I'm fine," she said again firmly. "And Edward, please don't say 'I told you so,'" she added.

"Bella, what the hell's going on? You're scaring me," he said frantically.

"I'm in the ER," she said on a heavy sigh. "I'm okay, but I think I broke my hand."

Edward had flipped a U-turn and was barreling back down the highway before he asked, "How in the world did you break your hand?"

Bella hesitated briefly before sighing again and replying, "I punched James McKay in the jaw."

* * *

**A/N: **Looks like two more chapters plus an epilogue…should all be posted by Sunday if not sooner.


	15. Chapter 15  Where the Love Light Gleams

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: **Lemon warning ahead… It's about time, isn't it? Edward's been on that couch a looooonnnngggg time…

* * *

**Chapter 15 – Where the Love Light Gleams**

Edward ran through the doors to the emergency room, waiting impatiently at the check-in desk as a woman with a crying baby paid her co-payment. When the exhausted woman finally turned to find a seat in the crowded waiting room, Edward leaned onto the counter anxiously.

"My wife is here," he told the woman. "Bella Sw…Bella _Cullen_," he corrected quickly. "Can you tell me where she is?"

The nurse clicked some keys on her computer. "Ah, yes, Mr. Cullen," she said after a moment. "The doctor's just finishing up with your wife. You're welcome to have a seat, or if you'd like to join her-"

Edward didn't let her finish. "I'd like to join her…please," he added at the woman's raised eyebrow.

The nurse smirked slightly. "Through the doors, second curtain on the right," she said, pointing at a set of swinging doors.

"Thank you," Edward replied before following the woman's instructions. He found Bella sitting on a gurney, a petite redhead in scrubs bent over her arm, adjusting a splint. Bella looked up as he approached.

"Edward!" she exclaimed cheerfully. "You're here!"

"Bella, are you okay?" He reached out to touch her, but then pulled back quickly, worried he might hurt her.

"I'm fine!" she waved her good arm, then seemed distracted by the movement, watching closely as her arm waved back and forth.

"Doctor?" Edward turned to the red-haired woman. "What's wrong with her? Did she hit her head?"

The doctor smiled up at him. "I assume you're Mr. Cullen?"

"Edward," he corrected.

"Well, Edward, Bella here is just fine. She's got what we call a boxer's fracture," the doctor explained. "It's not too bad. No need for a cast. She'll just need to wear this splint for a few weeks to give it time to heal."

"I punched James, Edward," Bella interrupted. "I punched him good." She swung her uninjured fist, almost falling off the gurney.

"Yeah." The doctor laughed. "She was in quite a bit of pain when she got here, so I gave her a little something."

Bella held her thumb and finger an inch apart, squinting at Edward between them as she whispered, "Li'l something."

Edward's mouth lifted in a half-grin. "You feeling okay, Bella?"

"I feel great!" she exclaimed, blinking widely. "How are you?"

"I'm fine," he replied, turning back to the doctor. "When can I take her home?"

The doctor signed a prescription pad, ripping off a slip and handing it to Edward. "She's all done. You'll want to get that filled before you go home. Once the medication wears off she might need it."

Edward nodded, tucking the slip in his pocket and thanking the doctor. He reached for Bella's arm. "You ready to go home?"

"Yup!" she said cheerfully, hopping to the floor. Her knees buckled and she fell into Edward. He caught her easily.

"Oops." Bella giggled.

"I've got you, baby," Edward murmured, helping her out of the curtained area.

"I love it when you call me baby," she whispered back.

Edward kept his arm wrapped tightly around Bella's waist as they left the hospital. The nurse at the check-in desk had assured him it would be all right to leave the minivan overnight as long as he returned the next day to get it.

"I can drive home, Edward," Bella had protested.

"Bella, you broke your hand, remember?"

"Oh, yeah."

He helped Bella into the car, reaching across her to buckle the seatbelt. He jumped slightly when he felt her mouth on his neck.

"You smell so good," she said against his skin.

"Thank you."

"Really, Edward," she said earnestly. "You smell _amazingly_ good. I could smell you all day."

Edward chuckled. "Well, you can smell me anytime."

He got into the driver's seat and backed out, turning toward home. He glanced over to see Bella watching him closely, her eyes slightly glazed.

"You're so hot," she said.

Edward smirked. "You're so high."

"I mean," Bella continued, not hearing his comment, "you were hot when I first met you. I mean you were all tall and brooding and intense and handsome. But now…now you're even hotter. You're like _inferno-hot_."

Bella rambled on, her words slurring slightly. "Sometimes I see you, and I just want to climb on…"

Her voice trailed off and Edward looked over at her. Bella's eyes were closed and she snored lightly.

"Sleep tight, Slugger," he whispered before turning back toward the highway.

~0~

Bella woke with a start when Edward pulled up in front of the house. He'd stopped at an all-night pharmacy to pick up Bella's prescription, and stuffed the bag into his pocket before rounding the car to help Bella out.

"Edward?" she mumbled. "My hand hurts."

"I know, baby. Come on, let's go inside." He led her carefully up to the front door unlocking the door and shoving it open before helping her inside. He'd called Alice from the hospital and knew she'd be sleeping on the couch. Bella's wooziness had worn off, but he still supported her as they made their way upstairs and into their room.

"You were right about James. He is an ass," Bella said with a wince as she sat down on the bed, leaning back onto the pillows.

Edward stiffened, but tried to at least put on a façade of calm. "What did he do?"

"Tried to kiss me."

"And you punched him?" Edward couldn't keep the proud smirk off his face.

Bella shrugged. "He wouldn't take no for an answer."

Edward sat down on the edge of the bed. "You are a formidable woman, Mrs. Cullen," he said with a grin.

"Are you mad?" she asked.

"At you? No. At him? There are no words to describe the depths of my fury."

Bella grinned. "You're mighty formidable yourself."

"Don't you forget it." He reached out to touch her hair. "I'm sorry you're hurt."

"Thanks."

Edward stood up. "Let me help you get ready for bed, and I'll get going." He bent down to untie her shoes.

"Or you could stay," Bella offered hesitantly. "It's late, and there's no reason for you to drive all the way over to Jasper's."

"I wouldn't want to hurt you," he said, indicating her arm.

"I'll be fine," she replied with a smile. "You sleep on the left anyway."

Edward returned to the task of removing Bella's shoes. "Okay, then. If you're sure."

"I'm sure."

He pulled off her jacket and jeans carefully, tucking her beneath the sheets after giving her a pain pill. He shed his own clothes, crawling in on the other side of the bed and turning out the light.

"How's your arm?" he asked into the darkness.

"Not too bad…kind of numb. It's not what hurts the most anyway."

Edward turned to her, barely making out her profile in the dim light coming through the window. "What do you mean?"

He heard her shrug. "I just feel like an idiot, that's all. I mean, for a writer like James McKay to say I had some talent…it was a real ego boost, I'm not going to lie. But to find out that all he wanted was… Well, it's a blow, you know?"

Edward reached out to take Bella's good hand. "Don't give up because of him, Bella."

"I don't know…"

"I do know," he said vehemently. "Bella, you do have a gift. You are an amazing and talented writer, and you have it in you to be bigger than James McKay ever was."

"That's really sweet of you to say."

"No, I'm not being sweet," Edward insisted. "I'm telling you the truth, Bella. I believe in you. You can do this. Don't let that asshole take your dream away from you."

Bella turned onto her side, resting her injured arm carefully on her hip. Edward could see her eyes shimmering slightly. "You really believe that, don't you?"

"I do."

"Thank you, Edward." He felt her watching him for a moment before she added, "Would you do something for me?"

"Anything."

"Would you come over here and hold me? It's been a long time."

"Too long," Edward agreed, shifting closer to her and sliding his arm carefully under her shoulders. She cuddled closer to him, her leg over his and her injured hand on his heart. He ran his fingers through her hair slowly and pressed a kiss to her head.

"I've missed this," she murmured.

"Me too."

"Good night, Edward."

"Good night, Bella."

~0~

Edward moved back home, and back into his bedroom. Bella was still hurting, and with her hand in a splint, needed some extra help around the house. She took a couple of days off work, but as the pain lessened to more of a dull throb than a sharp stab, she knew it was time to go back.

"Are you sure you're ready?" Edward asked the night before she was scheduled to return to the classroom. They were lying in bed with Bella's back tucked up against Edward's bare chest. His arm encircled her waist as she held his hand against her stomach. "Those fourth-graders can be ruthless," he added.

Bella laughed. "I'll be fine. I have an aide to help me out, and my students are wonderful," she said pointedly.

"How's your hand? Do you need a pill?"

He felt Bella shake her head under his chin. "No, I took a couple of Ibuprofen and it's fine," she replied. "Don't worry so much."

"I just want to take care of you," he said quietly. "I almost lost you and I don't ever want that to happen again."

"Edward, it's just a little fracture."

"That's not what I'm talking about."

Bella was silent for a moment. "I know." She shifted, turning around to face him. The full moon shone through the window and Edward could just barely make out her features where her head lay on the pillow next to his.

"It wasn't just you, Edward," she said, her eyes glistening pools in the moonlight. "It wasn't all your fault."

"But I-"

She cut him off. "We were both there, Edward. We _both_ did our part to drive a wedge between us." She reached out to stroke his hair gently. "I blamed you."

"For what?"

She laughed. "For everything. For getting married young…for having kids…for living in Forks and not getting my Master's…for giving up on writing."

"I didn't make it any easier for you," he pointed out.

"But it was _my _choice," she countered emphatically. "It was just easier to blame you than to accept responsibility myself. And instead of talking to you about it, I just kept it all inside…letting the resentment build and turn me into some kind of icy bitch. I could hardly blame you for wanting to get out of the house."

"That doesn't make it right."

He saw the glint of Bella's teeth as she smiled wryly. "No. It doesn't. But it does make it understandable. I pushed you away. I held on to my frustration and took it out on you."

"Bella—"

"No…no, please, let me say this," she interrupted. "I'm sorry, Edward. I'm sorry for blaming you and for cutting you out. I'm sorry that when you tried to help me out around the house all I could do was criticize. I'm sorry for turning away from you. I'm sorry for—"

Her words were lost as Edward finally leaned over to kiss her. After a moment, he pulled back. "I'm sorry too," he said. "But I think it's time to be done with apologies."

Bella smiled again. "Yeah. I guess so."

They stared at each other in the darkness, the only sounds the clicking of the bedside clock and their quiet breathing.

"You know, I've been thinking," Bella whispered.

"About what?"

"Second chances."

Edward took her splinted hand carefully, kissing her fingers. "What about them?"

Bella shrugged. "Just that maybe they aren't about fixing mistakes as much as learning from them."

Edward smiled. "I think maybe you're right."

"Edward?"

"Yeah."

"I've really missed you."

"I missed you too, baby."

Bella moved closer to him, resting her splint on his hip. "I really love it when you call me baby," she whispered.

"Yeah, you mentioned that," he said with a grin.

Suddenly the air between them changed…thickened…charged with something Edward couldn't name, but could definitely identify. Bella tilted her chin, brushing her lips against his softly before sucking his bottom lip into her mouth, releasing it with a soft pop.

"Bella," he groaned, "what about your arm?"

"My arm is fine," she replied, sliding her good hand down between them to stroke him through his flannel pajama pants.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked, unable to keep from thrusting gently against her hand.

"Edward…please…" She gripped him more firmly. "You're not going to make me beg, are you?"

"Perish the thought," Edward muttered on a long moan, giving in…giving up…giving over to the feelings he'd been fighting for so long. He rolled over carefully, avoiding Bella's splint. After only a brief hesitation – more to savor the moment than to question it – he kissed her deeply, pressing her into the pillow as his tongue slid into her warm mouth.

"I love you so much," he whispered between her lips. "I've wanted this for so long."

"Me too," she clutched at him with her good hand, pulling him closer. "God, Edward, I love you, too."

He kissed her again, softly then deeply, determined to make it last…to make a beautiful new memory for both of them. He gently moved her splinted hand so it rested on the pillow next to her head, then slid his hand down her side slowly, rubbing soft circles with his thumb.

She used to like that.

When she whimpered slightly, he smiled as he realized she still did.

He pulled her night shirt up, shifting to the side so he could slide it over her head. He gasped at the sight of her bare breasts, unable to resist leaning down to take one in his mouth. Bella clutched at his hair, arching upward with a moan and Edward sucked harder before flicking his tongue over her tight nipple.

"I've missed these," he rasped, before turning his attention to her other breast. He heard Bella chuckle, but the sound morphed into another moan as he grazed her nipple with his teeth.

"Edward!"

"Mmmm…" he responded, sliding a hand down to stroke her through her white cotton panties. She writhed against his hand, then reached out desperately to slide her own into his pants. Edward grit his teeth as she found what she was looking for.

"Bella," he groaned. "If you don't stop, this will be over way too soon."

"I need you," she replied frantically.

"I need you, too." He circled his hips as she tugged on his erection, fighting to maintain some control. "Just let me make you…_Uhhnn…_ feel good…please? It's been so long…I don't want to…_Oh God…_rush it."

Bella giggled slightly. "Okay, if you're sure that's what you want," she said teasingly, squeezing him tighter before pulling her hand from his pants.

Edward's eyes narrowed, even though in the dim light Bella couldn't see them. "You're enjoying driving me crazy, aren't you?" he accused.

Bella giggled again. The sound made Edward want to shout for joy.

"Maybe," she replied saucily.

"Well, two can play at that game," he warned, moving to kneel between her legs. He slid her panties down, dropping them to the floor unceremoniously as his gaze locked on the Promised Land. He stroked his hands up her thighs, parting them gently before pressing a wet kiss at the juncture of her hip, his tongue tracing lazy circles on her skin.

"Edward, what are you doing?"

His eyes flashed up to hers. In the dim light, he could see that she was watching him. He used one hand to part her swollen flesh before licking her once slowly…torturously.

She moaned.

"Don't you like it?" he asked innocently, flicking his tongue out again.

"Oh, God," she groaned. "It's just…you haven't done that for years."

Edward fought a wave of frustration at his alter ego, saying instead. "Guess I have to make up for lost time."

And he did. Using his tongue and his fingers, Edward brought Bella to the peak time and again, backing off only to build the anticipation even more. It had been ten years since he'd been able to touch her like that but, as they said, it was like riding a bike.

Except with orgasms.

Beautiful, sweaty, curse-filled orgasms. Edward watched Bella from between her legs as she climaxed, his mouth latched onto her and his fingers buried deep inside. She arched up, twisting as every muscle clenched tight and released, the splinted hand by her head, the other gripping his hair wildly. He marveled at the feel of the spasms tightening on his fingers, waiting until they lessened and Bella relaxed on the bed before sliding his hand free and pressing one more kiss on the inside of her thigh. He crawled over her, planting hot kisses along her damp skin on the way.

"I _really_ missed that," he said when he finally arrived at her lips, leaning down to kiss her softly. She grabbed his neck pulling him closer and wrapping her legs around his waist.

"Which part?" she asked jokingly.

"All of it," he replied, lowering his mouth to her neck. "But especially seeing you come apart in my arms."

"Mmmm…" she murmured, tilting her head as he nibbled on her collar bone. "Wanna see it again?" she asked, rocking her hips upward suggestively.

Edward smirked against her neck. "I thought you'd never ask."

And as he finally slid into her, his eyes clenched shut as her warmth enveloped him, Edward knew he had come home.

As he moved – slowly at first, then faster and deeper, feeling Bella accepting him, drawing him closer – he believed he'd found heaven.

As he watched her – as they watched each other – eyes locked as they tipped over that precipice between pleasure and pain…between love and loss…he vowed he'd never leave her again.

And as he collapsed next to her, tucking her into his arms and stroking her back as she drifted off to sleep, he said a silent prayer, thanking God for second chances.

* * *

**A/N: **I want to post the rest of the story in quick succession, so it might not be up until tomorrow… I'll do my best!


	16. Chapter 16  Baby, It's Cold Outside

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 16 – Baby, It's Cold Outside**

The next morning, the sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the joyous sound of children's laugher filled the air.

Okay, not really.

It was Forks, after all. It was cloudy and raining. The birds were notably absent, probably huddled under a bush somewhere to try and stay dry. As for the children, they were arguing about whether or not Spongebob could survive in the bathtub.

But for Edward? Yeah, it was all sunshine and rainbows.

"Good morning," he said with a grin as he swept into the kitchen, grabbing Bella and bending her over backward before planting a lingering kiss on her lips.

"Eeeewwww gross!" Masen complained, all thoughts of Spongebob forgotten as he covered his eyes.

Edward could see him smiling, though, so he kissed Bella once more for good measure before setting her back on her feet. She stroked his cheek before turning back to the bacon. He rested his hands lightly on her hips, his chin on her shoulder.

"Hungry?" she asked.

"Starving," he growled, nuzzling her neck until she giggled. Edward chuckled, squeezing her once more before he released her and walked around to sit by the kids at the breakfast bar. Masen still had his hands on his eyes, so Edward pulled them down playfully.

"All done," he reassured his son.

"Good," Masen replied, rolling his eyes dramatically. Edward ruffled his hair and leaned in to kiss his daughter on the cheek.

"How are you this morning, beautiful?" he asked her.

Makenna smiled prettily. "Fine, Daddy."

"Hey, I have an idea," he said, reaching out to pull her onto his lap, sliding her plate of scrambled eggs and toast over so she could reach it. "How about tonight I pick up a pizza and we have a Candy Land Championship Marathon!"

"Yes!" Masen fist pumped as Makenna bounced excitedly on her father's lap. "I am gonna win!" the little boy shouted.

"I don't think so," Edward warned. "I am _very_ good at Candy Land."

"Daddy?" Makenna placed her palms on Edward's cheeks, turning his face to her. "Can I be pink?"

"Pink?"

"The pink gingerbread man," she explained.

Edward nodded between her hands. "Sure, sweetie."

Masen spun around on his barstool. "There is no pink in Candy Land."

"Yes, there is," his sister replied stubbornly.

"Nope," he said, tucking his feet up so he could spin faster. "Only red, blue, green, and yellow!"

"Daddy?" Makenna turned pleading eyes toward him. He looked toward Bella for help, but she just shrugged at him and stirred the eggs.

"Uh…" Edward floundered slightly, but then got an idea. "I'll stop by the hardware store and pick up some paint and we'll _make_ a pink piece," he said, his chest swelling at the awed look on his daughter's face. She stuck her tongue out at Masen, who didn't notice because he was still spinning.

All was good.

~0~

"I really need to go," Edward said, his actions belying his words as he pressed Bella against the front door, his lips at her neck. He could hear the kids running around upstairs looking for their shoes and coats and was taking the opportunity to say goodbye properly to his wife.

Repeatedly.

"Yeah, you should definitely go," Bella replied breathlessly, her fingers sliding into his hair as she tugged his mouth back to hers.

"Early meeting," he murmured into her mouth.

"Uh huh." Bella deepened the kiss, her hands dropping down to his hips, pulling him against her.

"_Oh God_…Maybe I could call in sick?" Edward offered, brushing his thumb over her breast. Even through her thick sweater he could feel her respond.

"Mmmm…"

"We could spend the whole day in bed."

"Mommy, Masen said girls are stupid!" Makenna's outraged screech from the top of the stairs effectively ruined the mood. Still, Edward found himself smiling at the interruption. He backed away from Bella after one more quick kiss, just as the two children came down the stairs.

"I did not!" Masen explained, directing his words at his father, obviously hoping another male would support his viewpoint. "I said girls do stupid _things_," he clarified.

"Well, Masen, was that a very kind thing to say?" Edward asked.

Masen crossed his arms over his chest, betrayed by his father's lack of manly backup. "No," he grumbled.

"And it's not really true, is it? I mean, some girls do stupid things sometimes, but boys do too, right?"

Masen huffed in exasperation. "Right."

"Don't you think a comment like that might hurt your sister's feelings…or even Mommy's?" Edward pointed out.

Masen looked up at his mother guiltily. "I didn't mean to."

"I know you didn't." Edward rubbed his son's head. "But maybe you should make it right?"

Masen swallowed thickly. "I'm sorry." He reached over to hug his sister quickly, then his mother. Bella dropped to her knees to kiss the little boy's cheek.

"All's forgiven," she said cheerfully. "Now, are we ready for school?"

The family left the house together, Edward managing to steal one more kiss before getting into his car. He watched Bella and the kids in the minivan in front of him until they turned left to head to Makenna's day care as he continued on straight to the paper.

Overall, he was feeling pretty good about things. He might have been new to the whole husband and father gig, but he seemed to be catching on. Edward whistled cheerfully through his teeth as he pulled up in front of the _Weekly_, winking at Shelly as he made his way to the little conference room next to his office for the morning staff meeting. After brainstorming ideas for the next issue with the rest of the staff, Edward and Ben made the initial assignments so Shelly could post them on the white board.

Lunchtime found him daydreaming at his desk, Googling ideas for Valentine's Day. Nothing too over the top – he'd learned his lesson about that – but he definitely wanted to do something special for Bella. He still had a few weeks, but Edward was excited and didn't want to leave it until the last minute.

They could go to dinner at The Lodge. The food there was actually pretty good…then maybe a drive up the coast to watch the waves crash on the beach.

Or maybe a picnic? They could go to First Beach – or maybe out to the meadow where they used to go when they were teenagers. Edward smiled at the memory of the first time he kissed Bella. They'd skipped school with some friends and shared a bottle of Boone's Farm in the meadow as they huddled under heavy blankets. He'd turned to her, extending his arm to offer her half of his blanket. When she'd snuggled next to him, he couldn't resist leaning down to kiss her softly.

She'd smiled up at him, and even then he knew his heart was lost.

The meadow was definitely a good idea. No Boone's Farm, though. He could afford a halfway decent bottle of champagne – and maybe a tent and a portable heater to keep warm? He'd have to work on that.

Unfortunately, work kept him busy for the rest of the afternoon, giving him little time to fine-tune his plans. He did remember to call ahead to order the pizza before he left the office. Bella had a couple of parent conferences after school, and by the time she picked up the kids and made it home, he'd have the table set and the Candy Land game ready.

He was about to walk out the door when a screechy call came across the scanner on Shelly's desk. She reached over to adjust the volume, listening carefully and jotting down a few notes.

"Sounds like a bad accident over on Division Street," she said. "I can call Alex and get him over there."

Edward shook his head. Car accidents usually didn't make _The Weekly_, simply because by the time the paper went to print they were old news. Still, he couldn't ignore it. "No need," he replied. "I have to go that way to head home anyway. I'll check it out."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. It's no problem," Edward assured her. "I'll talk to the cops and get a few pictures. If it's a big deal, I'll call Alex myself."

He double-checked his bag to make sure he had a tape recorder and camera handy, then got in his car and headed toward the accident scene. Traffic was blocked off a short distance away. He could make out the flashing police lights, but not much else in the dimming light. Edward parked at the curb and approached the uniformed deputy at the roadblock. Just as he said hello, his cell phone rang.

Not recognizing the caller's number, he flipped his phone open. "Excuse me," he said to the deputy, before answering the phone.

"Hello?"

"Edward, it's Charlie."

Edward was surprised to hear his father-in-law's voice and hesitated briefly before replying, "Hi, Charlie. How are you?"

"Edward there's no easy way to say this…there's…there's been an accident." Charlie's voice trembled slightly, confusing Edward even more.

"Yeah…I know. I'm down here to cover it for the paper."

He heard Charlie clear his throat before continuing. "No. You don't understand, son. It's Bella."

Edward felt Charlie's words like a punch in the stomach. _It's Bella._ He couldn't mean…

"What?" he asked, the word barely making it past his lips.

Charlie sniffed and Edward realized the man was crying. "It's Bella, Edward. She's been hurt."

"Oh, God…no…" Edward murmured, panic beginning to sizzle along his nerve endings. "Is she okay? Where are the kids?" He began to make his way through the road block, ignoring the deputy who called for him to stop. "Charlie, is she okay?" He started to run in the direction of the flashing lights. When he made out the tangled pile of metal that used to be his minivan, an anguished cry tore from his throat.

"Edward…Edward!" He heard Charlie calling to him and pressed the phone to his ear. "The kids are okay, but Bella…" His voice broke. "I'm with her now at the hospital. You need to get over here, Edward."

He turned to run back to his car, but a strong hand gripped his elbow. He turned to see Emmett McCarty looking down at him with compassion in his eyes.

"I was passing by and saw what happened," he explained. "Let me take you to the hospital, Edward. You shouldn't be driving."

Edward couldn't reply. He just nodded jerkily and followed Emmett to his truck. It was only a few blocks to the hospital and Emmett made it record time. He pulled up in front of the emergency entrance and Edward jumped out before the truck rolled to a stop, racing through the sliding doors. He saw Charlie immediately, standing next to the reception desk.

"How is she?" Edward asked frantically.

Charlie shook his head. "I don't know. The doctors are with her now."

"What about the kids?"

"They're fine," he replied. "I was just in there with them. They're pretty shaken up, but they'll be okay. Just some cuts and scrapes. Come on, I'll take you back."

He led Edward through a door into an examining area and Edward breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Masen and Makenna sitting on a couple of chairs sucking on lollipops. Masen had a Band-Aid on his forehead, and Makenna's right hand was wrapped in gauze, but other than that, they looked uninjured. He rushed over to pull them both in a tight hug.

"Are you guys okay?" he asked, running his hands over their heads and fighting tears.

"We had a crash, Daddy," Masen replied dully.

Edward pulled back, but kept his arms around his children, unable to release them. "I know, buddy. I'm so sorry that happened."

"Where's Mommy?" Makenna asked in thin voice.

Edward swallowed thickly. "The doctors are taking care of her right now. I'm sure we'll see her soon."

"She wouldn't wake up," Masen whispered, turning his face away, apparently to spare his sister. "I tried to wake her up, but she wouldn't wake up."

"It's okay. You did great," he replied. "I'm so glad you're both okay." He hugged his children tightly again.

"I called Esme and Carlisle," Charlie said quietly. "They should be here any minute. I can take the kids out to the waiting room so you can see Bella."

Edward nodded and thanked him, hugging his children once more before Charlie led them out. He stopped by the door to talk to a nurse, who nodded and quickly walked over to Edward.

"Mr. Cullen? I can take you to your wife now."

Edward nodded again, too stunned to speak. They were supposed to be having pizza right now. They were supposed to be playing Candy Land. He was supposed to be making a pink gingerbread man for Makenna.

Instead he walked down a sterile hall smelling of disinfectant, unable to think or to speak.

All he could do was pray.

"Don't take her," he whispered over and over again under his breath. "Please, don't take her."

"She's in here," the nurse said quietly, pity and compassion in her eyes. "You don't have much time. They're prepping her for surgery."

Edward walked through the doorway to find a group of doctors and nurses surrounding his wife where she lay pale and small on a hospital bed. Small cuts marred her skin along the right side of her face, and he could see similar cuts on her right arm, above the splint.

"Bella?" Edward croaked, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. Everyone except Bella, whose eyes remained closed, her chest rising and falling slowly as she breathed.

"Mr. Cullen? I'm Doctor Matthews." A tall African-American man in scrubs rounded the bed to approach him.

"How's Bella?" Edward asked.

Dr. Matthews frowned slightly. "She's got some broken bones – her leg, and a few ribs…but I'm afraid there are some internal injuries as well. We'll need to operate as soon as possible to deal with that."

"Operate?" Edward couldn't take his eyes from Bella's still frame.

"I'm sorry, I know this is a lot to take in," Dr. Matthews continued, "but we really don't have a lot of time. We need your consent for the surgery, sir." He held out a clipboard to Edward, who stared at it blankly before taking the offered pen and signing it.

"Can I talk to her?" he asked.

"She hasn't regained consciousness yet, but you can try," the doctor replied. "We'll give you a minute, then I'm afraid we'll have to take her to surgery." He motioned to the other staff and they all left the room, leaving Edward standing at the foot of the bed, gazing at his wife through unshed tears. Slowly, he approached her left side, taking her uninjured hand in his. He stroked the soft skin, kissing it gently and pressing it to his cheek.

"Bella?" he whispered. "Bella, don't leave me."

He watched her intently. "Please don't leave me."

Bella's eyelids fluttered and her hand twitched in his. He watched in awe as her eyes opened slowly, staring unseeingly before she blinked and looked at him.

"Edward?"

Edward smiled, leaning forward to kiss her forehead softly. "Hey, baby."

She began to smile, wincing with pain. "I love it when you call me baby."

Edward chuckled. "I know.

"What happened?"

"There was an accident. God, Bella, I thought I lost you."

"Accident?" Bella's eyes grew alarmed. "The kids?"

"They're fine," he assured her. "They can't wait to see you."

Bella relaxed against the pillows, closing her eyes in relief. "Thank God."

Edward kissed her hand again. "I love you so much, Bella."

"I love you…" Bella's voice trailed off as a loud screeching sound burst from one of the machines.

"Bella?"

She didn't open her eyes. The doctors and nurses ran back into the room, shoving him out of the way unceremoniously.

"We can't wait," Dr. Matthews said urgently. "We've got to take her now!"

"What's happening? Bella?" Edward watched the frantic movements of the medical staff, panic and fear once again twisting in his stomach.

"One…two…three…" Dr. Matthews counted before they lifted Bella's small body onto a gurney, laying her I.V. bag on her chest. They rolled her out into the hallway.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Cullen, we have to go now," the doctor said as they rushed down the hallway. "I'll try to update you on her condition as soon as I can." They pushed Bella through a set of double doors and a nurse standing nearby grabbed his arm.

"Bella! I love you!" he called after her, his heart beating rapidly as his breathing seemed to stop. The thought of Bella going through those doors and never coming back…the thought of losing her forever…it gripped his chest like a vice. He turned to the nurse standing next to him, unaware that he had tears flowing down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry, you can't go in there," she said sympathetically. "You'll need to go to the waiting room." At his blank look, she turned him around, walking him through the door into the waiting area. He blinked unseeingly at his surroundings. Esme and Carlisle were playing with the children at a low table nearby. Jasper and Alice and Rosalie and Emmett spoke in low voices as they sipped bad coffee across the room.

Charlie sat by the door, stoic and silent, his back rigid, but his throat working constantly as he fought to maintain his control. They all looked up hopefully when he walked into the room.

"They took her to surgery," he said flatly, walking over to his children and pulling them onto his lap. He held them close, burying his nose in Makenna's hair.

"Daddy?" Masen looked up at him. "Is Mommy going to be okay?"

Edward stared down at his son for a moment, as the dazed fog over his brain finally lifted.

_Shit! What was he waiting for?_

He set his children gently on the floor before standing up abruptly. "I'll be right back," he said, already searching his pockets as he headed for the hallway. He had to find an isolated spot.

You couldn't have angels popping up just anywhere.

He checked a few closed doors and finally found an empty patient's room. Pulling out the silver bell he rang it violently and waited.

"Hello, Edward."

He spun around to see Michael standing directly behind him.

"You have to save her," Edward said without preamble.

Michael gazed at him somberly. "I'm sorry. That's beyond my power."

"What do you mean?" Edward spat angrily. "You said the bell was for emergencies. This is a damned emergency! Save my wife."

"I can't, Edward."

"You won't."

"I _can't_," Michael repeated sadly. "Believe me, if I could do it, I would."

Deflated, Edward sat heavily on the bed. "Is she going to die?" he asked, his voice breaking.

Michael said nothing, but Edward could read the answer in his eyes.

"When?" he asked. "Today?"

Michael shook his head. "No, not today…not tomorrow…but soon. I can't give you an exact time. It's not up to me."

"So all this…it was for nothing? I found Bella only to lose her again?"

"I'm sorry, Edward."

"You're sorry," he snarled sarcastically. "What kind of an angel are you, anyway?"

Michael smiled sadly. "I _can_ do something else for you."

"What?"

"I can send you back."

"Back?" Edward repeated. "Back to New York?"

Michael nodded. "You can go back to that world. I can make you forget all this ever happened. No more pain…no sadness. You could have your old life back."

Edward stared at him disbelievingly. "What about my children?"

Michael shrugged lightly. "You won't remember them. I mean, you don't even believe they're real, do you?"

_Did he?_

He thought about teaching Masen to ride a bike, and learning how to hold Makenna's baby doll correctly. He thought about eating pancakes together and running on the beach.

He thought about hugs and kisses and baths and nighttime rituals.

_Good night, sweet dreams_

_My love is in the moonbeams_

And he thought about Bella…about living and loving and fighting and making up. He thought about sharing pizza and sharing laughs…about making love and building a life together.

Yes. It was real.

He believed it with all his heart.

"You have to decide now, Edward," Michael said. "I'm sorry, but it has to be now."

Edward didn't even think twice before he said simply, "No."

"No?"

"No." Edward stood up and squared his shoulders. "When Bella comes out of surgery, she's going to need me. If she is going to…" He cleared his throat and swallowed thickly. "If it's her time, I don't want her to be afraid. I want to be with her. The kids…the kids will need me to get through this. I have to be there for them."

Michael tilted his head, eyeing him carefully. "It's not going to be easy, Edward."

Edward nodded once. "I know that. But I can't give up on them. They need me and I'm not running away this time."

A bright smile broke out across Michael's face. "Excellent, Edward. Well done."

Suddenly the overhead lights began to glow brighter, until the whole room was filled with a dazzling light.

"What's happening?" Edward asked. Then, he knew.

"No!" he exclaimed.

"You've done really well, Edward…better than I expected, to be honest," Michael said proudly, the features of his face growing difficult to distinguish in the increasing light. Edward squinted, holding a hand up in front of him.

"No!" he said again. "You can't do this."

"Don't forget what you've learned, Edward," Michael admonished before the light exploded in Edward's eyes, blinding him momentarily.

He blinked hard a couple of times, trying to see the door leading out of the room. He had to get back to his family.

"Bella!" he cried out in a loud voice.

The next moment, he found himself sitting straight up in bed in his hotel room, fully dressed.

"No!" he exclaimed, looking around the room in disbelief. "Michael, you son of a bitch, send me back!" he screamed, searching his pockets for the bell. Not finding it, he tore the sheets off the bed, shaking them out before tossing them aside. He dropped to the floor, running his hand under the bed.

"Send me back, Michael!" he shouted.

The bell was gone. Michael was gone. His family was gone. Edward collapsed on the bare mattress, breathing heavily. After a moment, the sound of voices from the other room drew his attention. He walked out of the bedroom and into the little sitting area to find the television on, and _It's a Wonderful Life_ playing yet again.

"Perfect," he mumbled, dropping to the floor against the front of the sofa, his head in his hands. "Bella," he moaned. "God, why?"

The people on the TV screen began to sing Auld Lang Syne as George Bailey held little Zuzu in his arms with a huge smile on his face. A bell rang on the Christmas tree and Zuzu pointed to it gleefully.

"_Look Daddy," the little girl said, "Teacher says every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings."_

"Yeah, well Teacher forgot to tell you that angels suck!" Edward shouted to the ceiling, hoping Michael was listening. He glanced back at the TV, fighting tears as the girl reminded him of his own daughter.

Mindless of the world around him, Edward curled up on the floor, mourning the life he'd lost.

Mourning the life he apparently never had.

~0~

Edward wallowed in misery for approximately twenty-three-point-four seconds.

Then, there was a loud and very insistent knock on the door.

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**A/N: **I know I promised to have the rest of the story posted today, but some RL stuff got in the way. I'll do my best to get the last chap. and epi up in a timely manner… hopefully by tomorrow night. Thanks for your patience!


	17. Chapter 17  If You Just Believe

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: **Sorry about the delay for this chapter…a few things popped up that bugged me, and I had to address them before I could post it. Thanks for your patience!

* * *

**Chapter 17 – If You Just Believe**

Edward tried to ignore whoever was at his door, but they would not be thwarted. The light tapping became a persistent knocking, and finally a rather obnoxious pounding.

"Go away," he grumbled under his breath where he lay on the floor. He repeated the command a little louder a moment later.

The knocking continued.

Finally, with an exasperated moan, Edward pulled himself to his feet, glaring at the credits of _It's a Wonderful Life_ on the television as he made his way to the door. He whipped it open, staring in surprise at who he found standing there.

"Tanya?"

"Morning, Edward," the blonde said with a bright smile as she swept into the room. "Merry Christmas!"

"What?" He scrubbed his hands over his face, then up through his hair. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to drag you out of bed, of course," she said with a roll of her eyes. "You don't have much time. Goodness, did you sleep in those clothes?" She leaned toward him, her nose wrinkling. "Yeah. A shower's definitely in order, but you'll have to hurry."

"What are you talking about? How did you know where I to find me? What are you doing here?" Edward repeated, his head still a little fuzzy.

Tanya propped her fists on her hips, choosing to answer the second question first. "Your friend Michael told me where you were staying. I ran into him at the party last night."

"Party?"

"At the Four Seasons…?" she prodded, "Isabella Swan…? You running out like a scared little girl…? Ringing any bells?"

At the mention of bells, Edward's eyes narrowed. "You said Michael sent you here?"

"Yeah," she said grabbing his arm and steering him toward the bedroom. "I met him at the party and he mentioned he knew you. When I found out about that guy you saw with Bella, I knew I had to come find you."

"Guy? What the hell are you talking about?" Edward planted his feet on the plush carpet. "What's going on?"

"He's gay, Edward."

"Gay? Who? Michael?" Edward's head was spinning.

"No, not Michael." She laughed. "Jacob."

Edward rubbed his temples, trying to ward off the headache he could feel coming on. "Who the hell's Jacob?"

Tanya waved her hands in exasperation. "The guy you saw with Bella last night. Aren't you listening?"

"I'm listening. It's just a little hard to keep up."

"Yeah. I get that a lot," she said with a slight frown. "Anyway, I got to meet her last night. She really is amazing, and so nice! She told me to call her Bella, isn't that sweet? She autographed my book – well, your book." Tanya pulled the novel out of her shoulder bag and handed it to Edward. He reached out slowly to take it. "I told her all about you."

"You did what?"

"She was _really_ interested, Edward," Tanya continued in a rather enticing voice. "She kept asking questions about you."

"Okay, enough," Edward said gruffly. "Tell me what this is all about. Now," he ordered. At Tanya's wide-eyed look, he added, "Please."

Tanya huffed slightly. "It's simple Edward. Bella is not involved with that guy Jacob. He's just a friend she takes to events so she doesn't have to be alone. She's lonely, Edward. She misses you."

"She said that?"

"God, men are such idiots!" Tanya exclaimed, slugging him in the shoulder lightly. "Of course she didn't _say_ it, but it was very obvious. I could see it on her face whenever I said your name."

Edward collapsed onto the sofa, reaching up to clutch at his hair. "What do I do?" he asked finally, his head still spinning.

_She'd met Michael, which meant he was real._

_Which meant his other life was real. Didn't it?_

_Or maybe…maybe it was a lesson…a warning._

"She's staying at the Four Seasons, but she told me she's catching a flight later this morning," Tanya told him. "She's heading home to visit her family for Christmas. Now's your chance to catch her before she leaves."

_Bella was here…in the here and now. _

_Maybe it wasn't too late._

At Edward's dazed look, Tanya narrowed her eyes. "It's been ten years. Have you learned _nothing,_ Edward?" she asked quietly.

Edward stiffened at that. All was not lost. In this life, there was still a chance…but he had to take it. He couldn't let it slip away.

"There's not much time," she added. "What's it gonna be, Edward?"

_I'm not running away this time._

Edward shot to his feet. "Do I have time for a shower?"

Tanya smiled brightly. "Yes, but make it fast. No time to shave. The scruffy look's kind of sexy anyway." She shoved him into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. "And do that tousled thing you do with your hair," she called through the door. "Women love that."

"I don't know what you're talking about," he called back as he stepped under the spray.

Edward thought he might have heard her mutter something derogatory about men on the other side of the door, but he couldn't be sure. He showered quickly, scrubbing his hair with a towel after wiping the steam from the mirror. He frowned at the damp mop, running his hand through it quickly.

Tousled? He twisted a few strands, but they bounced back to their customary position – wild and uncontrollable.

"Edward, hurry up!" Tanya yelled impatiently. Edward shrugged at his reflection and walked into the bedroom, a towel draped around his hips.

Tanya had apparently gone through his luggage while he was in the shower. A set of clothes lay on the bed – underwear, socks, jeans, and a white cotton shirt.

"Making yourself at home, I see," he shouted into the other room as he pulled on the shirt.

"Just get dressed, Edward. We don't have time for this," she hollered back.

Edward threw on his clothes, sliding his feet into his favorite pair of worn boots, and grabbing a wool coat from the closet.

"You're much pushier than I remember from last night," he commented as he shrugged into the coat and picked up his old leather satchel, tucking Bella's book inside.

Tanya shrugged. "Just part of my charm. Now come on, let's go already," she ordered.

They hurried to the elevator and Tanya pressed the button for the underground garage. "I brought my car," she explained. "Didn't want to have to wait for a cab." She checked her watch. "We should make it just in time."

When the elevator doors opened, they ran through the parking garage, Edward trailing after Tanya as she dodged between the parked cars. He stifled a laugh when she came to a stop next to a huge purple Lincoln.

"Hey," she said defensively, "don't mock the Lincoln. It's a classic."

"I didn't say a word," Edward replied, holding his hands up in front of him. "Can you even drive this thing in New York?"

Tanya patted the roof affectionately as she unlocked the door.

"When people see this baby coming, they get out of the way," she said.

"I'll bet."

Tanya handled the monstrous car with ease, pulling effortlessly out of the garage and into traffic. Edward was surprised to see that she was right. People did get out of the way.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked quietly as she sped past a cab, pulling in front of it quickly and ignoring the horn blaring behind her.

"He was going too slow," she replied absently.

"No," Edward clarified with a laugh. "I mean, why are you helping me? We hardly know each other."

"Oh, that." Tanya smiled widely. "Guess I'm just a sucker for love."

She turned a corner and pulled to the curb in front of the Four Seasons.

"Okay, you're up," she said brightly as Edward's stomach turned somersaults. "Go get your girl, Edward."

He reached for the door handle and stepped out onto the sidewalk, ducking his head back inside before closing it.

"No matter what happens, thank you, Tanya," he said.

She waved a hand. "Just don't let her get away again, okay?"

Edward nodded and shut the door, turning to approach the hotel's entrance quickly. He heard Tanya gun the Lincoln's engine, and then she was gone.

He was on his own. Where should he start? His mind raced as he wove through a crowd of people walking out the entry doors. Would the desk clerk even tell him which room Bella was in? Edward would have to be persistent. Hell, he'd wait in the lobby until she showed up if he had to.

He'd find a way.

Squaring his shoulders, Edward pulled open the glass door, holding it for a group of people coming out, politeness winning out over impatience.

Then he saw her.

She passed within inches of him, pulling a rolling suitcase, her attention on a telephone call.

"No, I'm leaving the hotel now," she said as the scent of her perfume wafted toward his nose. It was different than he remembered, but somehow uniquely Bella.

Had it only been a few hours since they lay in bed together, whispering in the darkness? Fewer still since he held her hand and told her he loved her?

Edward could barely take a breath. His heart clenched in his chest, as though unwilling to pump blood through his body. He could hardly believe she was there in front of him – alive and well – almost close enough to touch if he just reached out.

"Yes, I'll have to deal with it when I get to Forks," she said as she approached a black Town Car waiting at the curb, unaware of Edward trailing behind her. "Yes…yes, I'll call you when I land…okay…_okay! _Sheesh, cut me a break Jessica, it's Christmas!" Bella handed her suitcase to the driver and turned back toward the hotel.

"Yes, yes, I promise I'll—" Her words cut off abruptly, her eyes widening as she finally noticed Edward standing just a few feet away.

He took a step toward her. "Bella."

Her mouth opened and closed a few times, no sound coming forth. Finally, she blinked, shaking her head slightly. Edward could hear whoever was on the other end of the phone talking rapidly.

"Jess, I'll have to call you back," Bella said quietly, hanging up without waiting for an answer.

They stood for a moment, just staring at each other. Bella finally cleared her throat. "Edward. It's…it's been a long time."

Edward licked his lips, taking another step toward her. "Too long."

"How have you been?" she asked, feigning nonchalance, but Edward recognized the telltale flush on her cheeks, the bite of her lip that proved her nervousness.

"Honestly? Not good, Bella. Not good for a very long time," he admitted.

"I'm sorry to hear that," she said, her voice cracking slightly. "Edward, what are you doing here?"

"I came to find you."

"Me? Why?" Her chin lifted slightly, and Edward recognized the flash of anger in her eyes. "It's been ten years, Edward. Why come find me now?"

Edward took a deep breath.

All in.

Now or never.

"I miss you," he told her, taking another step closer. "I love you."

She stared at him in shock, and he took advantage of her speechlessness. "I know it took me a while to figure it out," he continued quickly, now close enough to touch her. He didn't, though. He didn't want to scare her off. Instead, his eyes raked over her face, taking in the familiar curve of her cheek…the stain of pink on her chilled skin…the flutter of her hair in the icy breeze.

"I'm sorry it took so long," he continued, "but if you'll give me a chance, I swear I'll make it up to you, Bella."

She looked away, the wind blowing her hair back from her face. Edward stared at her, unable to look away. He half feared that if he did, she would disappear.

"You really hurt me," she said dully.

"I know," he replied softly. "I know I did, and I'm so sorry. It's the biggest regret of my life. But someone told me recently that second chances aren't about fixing mistakes as much as learning from them.

"I've learned, Bella. I've learned what it means to really love someone." She turned back to him and he prayed he was getting through. "I've learned that it's not all about romantic gestures and fancy words," he said fervently. "It's about…doing the laundry…and paying the bills. It's about raising a family and being there to tuck your kids into bed at night. It's about day in and day out living life together…through the good times and the bad.

"For a long time I regretted what happened between us. But I was so paralyzed by what happened _then_ that I couldn't see the possibilities of _now_. I was so wrapped up in thinking about what might have been that I couldn't see what _could be_."

"Edward, it's been ten years," Bella said again, crossing her arms over her chest. "Sure, I was hurt at the time…for a long time, actually, but I got over it. I've moved on."

"Have you?" he asked, leaning toward her, his eyes searching hers for the truth. "Because if you really have, I'll go. If you can tell me that it's really over…that you don't have any feelings left for me…that there's no chance for us anymore, I'll go, Bella, and I won't bother you again.

"But if there is a chance," he said softly. "If there's a possibility that we could build something together here…now…please don't turn away from it. I'll fight for us, Bella. I'll do whatever it takes if you'll give me a chance…give _us_ a chance.

"We could have an amazing life, Bella. I've _seen_ it. I've seen what we can be together when we really try to make it work, and it's amazing. You wouldn't believe it…how amazing it is." He reached out then, taking her chilled hand in both of his. "Just a beginning…that's all I'm asking for. We could go have breakfast…or a cup of coffee…whatever you want."

Bella opened her mouth to reply, but was interrupted by her driver who was standing on the other side of the Town Car. "Excuse me, Miss Swan," he said quietly, earning a glare from Edward, which he ignored. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but we need to leave now if we're going to get to the airport on time."

Bella nodded, turning back to Edward. "I'm sorry, I have to go," she said quietly. "I'm going home for Christmas."

Edward held her hand a little tighter. "Okay…yes, I understand," he said, adding hopefully, "When will you be back? Can I see you then?"

"No." She shook her head and Edward's heart fell. "No, I mean, I won't be back in New York…not anytime soon," she clarified. "I'll be in Forks until New Years, then I start a book tour."

"Oh." Edward couldn't hide his disappointment.

"Unless," she began hesitantly. "I mean…I suppose, if you wanted to…you could…come?"

A new hope bloomed in Edward's chest. "To Forks?"

"Yeah." Bella shrugged. "I know you're probably too busy…"

"No…no, I'm not too busy," Edward said quickly. "I don't go back to work until the New Year."

"But you don't have any luggage. I suppose you could take a later flight," she suggested.

"No," Edward said firmly. At her surprised look, he smiled softly. "Now that I've found you, I'm not letting you out of my sight. I can get clothes in Forks. I know they have great flannel there."

Bella laughed. "Flannel? Doesn't really sound like your style."

"You'd be surprised," he said with a grin.

Bella looked up at him as the driver opened the car door. "What's happened to you, Edward?"

"It's a long story," he told her with a deep breath.

"Sir?" The driver held his hand out to Edward. "I think you dropped this."

Edward extended his palm and the man dropped a little metal ball into it. Edward stared at it for a moment in shock.

A silver bell.

"Where did you get this?" he asked.

The driver shrugged. "It fell out of your pocket."

Edward took the bell between his fingers, shaking it gently. It tinkled lightly and Edward held his breath, his eyes scanning the area.

Nothing.

"Edward? Are you coming?" Bella asked from inside the car. Edward looked down at her, a smile growing as he realized the gift he'd been given. A second chance…a new beginning. He tucked the bell into his jeans pocket and slid into the seat next to her.

As they pulled away from the curb, Bella turned toward him. "So, this long story…" she prodded.

Edward grinned. "Oh, it's pretty unbelievable," he said. "It's got angels and miracles…as a matter of fact," he said speculatively, "it could make a good book."

Bella settled into the seat. "Well, that sounds like a story I'd like to hear."

So he told her.

As they drove to the airport and waited in the VIP lounge, Bella listened raptly as Edward told the story…stopping only when they had to check the baggage or show their tickets or when it was time to board. Edward managed to switch seats with an older man so he could sit next to Bella and once the plane took off, she asked him impatiently, "And then what happened?"

He told his story without holding back any of the crazy-sounding details. Bella interrupted occasionally only to ask questions.

"How old was Makenna?"

"Alice and Jasper were _married?_"

"Really? Rosalie and Emmett McCarty?"

Edward answered her questions patiently, and somewhere over Salt Lake City, he finished his rather remarkable tale, taking Bella up to the moment that he woken up in his hotel room.

"You're right," she said with a sigh, sitting back in her seat. "That is quite a story." She looked at him thoughtfully. "So, it was all a dream then?"

Edward shook his head slowly. "No. No, I don't think so. I don't know how, but it was real…at least to me."

"So…what happened to all of them?" she asked. "Are they still out there…somewhere?"

Edward shrugged. "I don't know for sure," he replied. "I think maybe they were all part of…a _possibility_. What would have been…_could_ have been…if things had gone differently between us back then."

"That's kind of sad," she mused. "It's like they had to be sacrificed for us to have this chance."

"Isn't every choice like that?" Edward asked.

"I suppose."

"You seem to be taking this awfully well," he said wryly. "Don't you think I'm crazy?"

Bella laughed. "Crazy? Definitely."

Edward smirked. "Well, you're the one that invited the crazy person home," he pointed out.

"True," she admitted, "but in my defense, that was before you told me what happened."

Edward sobered. "So what do you think…really?"

Bella smiled at him softly. "I think something definitely happened to you last night," she said. "Whether it was a dream or a magical trip to an alternate reality…who can know for sure? 'There are more things in Heaven and earth…'"

"'…than are dreamt of in your Philosophy," Edward concluded the quote from Hamlet.

"Yeah," Bella grinned. "There are so many mysteries out there, Edward. It's part of makes life exciting, isn't it?"

Edward smiled, taking her hand and lifting it to his lips. "Thanks."

"For what?"

"For not calling me crazy."

"I'm just glad you're here," Bella said softly.

"Me too."

They sat in silence for a while, both gazing out the window at the clouds floating by, lost in their own thoughts.

"It _had_ to be real," Edward said after a moment. At Bella's questioning look, he continued, "Tanya said she met Michael…so he couldn't have been a figment of my imagination, right?"

"Who's Tanya?"

"You met her at the party last night," Edward told her. "You talked to her about me."

Bella's brow creased in confusion. "I didn't talk to anyone about you last night."

"Sure you did." Edward thought maybe Bella had forgotten amidst all the people she'd met at the party. "Tall girl? Blonde? Huge fan of yours?"

At Bella's shrug, Edward reached under his seat for his satchel. "You autographed a book for her," he said, pulling it out and flipping it open. He turned a few pages, looking for the autograph. "I don't understand," he murmured as he searched the book, slamming it shut as the search came up empty. "She said she talked to you. She convinced me that I should come find you. She knew all about that guy Jacob, and said that you missed me."

"I did miss you," Bella said with a small smile.

Edward squeezed her hand. "But how did she know that if she never talked to you?"

They stared at each other for a moment.

"You don't think…" Bella began. "Maybe Michael wasn't working alone?"

"Maybe." Edward replied. "Or maybe I just imagined them both."

"You don't really believe that."

Edward shrugged. "I don't know. I don't know anything except whatever happened…whatever it was that led me to this moment…I owe to the two of them."

Bella smiled at him. "I guess I owe them too."

Edward lifted his arm around her shoulders, drawing her close to his side. "I know we can't just pick up where we left off, Bella," he said quietly. "We have a lot to catch up on…a lot to learn about each other."

"We have plenty of time," she replied. She picked up his other hand, playing with his fingers idly.

"I wonder how it ends," Bella murmured after a while.

"What?"

"The story," she said, turning toward him again with a smile, her eyes twinkling. "It _would_ make a great book, but it needs an ending."

"Well, I'd say that's up to you," Edward replied.

Bella tapped her lips thoughtfully. "It can't end with them up in the air," she mused. "I mean, it's so unresolved."

Edward smirked. "Good point." He leaned closer to her, his eyes dipping to her lips. "Maybe he'll lean in, promise to love her forever, and kiss her passionately."

Bella fought a grin, wrinkling her nose. "That's kind of cliché, don't you think?" She blushed, though. The blush always gave her away.

He reached out with one hand to cup her face, savoring the feel of her warm skin as he brushed his thumb along her cheekbone. "Clichés become clichés for a reason," he pointed out, his lips a mere breath away from hers. "I prefer to think of it as a classic…a crowd pleaser."

"You think?" Bella asked breathlessly. She licked her lips, leaning slightly into his hand.

"Oh, yeah…definitely," Edward murmured, almost able to taste her already. "Everyone loves a happy ending."

Then he kissed her.

And Bella didn't think it was cliché at all.

* * *

**A/N: **Epi will be up soon… tomorrow night at the latest. Thanks for reading!


	18. Epilogue  Joy to the World

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Epilogue – Joy to the World**

_Christmas Eve, Two Years Later_

"I hope they're okay," Bella murmured to Edward as she looked out the window of their New York apartment onto the snow-covered streets below. "Maybe we should have gone to the airport to get them."

Edward wrapped his arms around Bella's waist – a difficult task given the late stages of her pregnancy. He rubbed her swollen belly, smiling at the feel of a kick under his palm.

"I offered, but we couldn't fit them all in the car anyway," Edward replied. "They'll be fine. Don't worry so much."

But Bella was worried. Given Bella's condition, she and Edward couldn't fly back to Forks for the holidays and she'd been disappointed that they wouldn't get to see their families. Edward, however, had taken the opportunity to use some of his abundant frequent flier miles to buy tickets for them all to come to New York instead. Bella had cried when he told her. Of course, Bella was especially prone to crying lately, but that didn't diminish the fact that she was overwhelmed and so thankful for what Edward had done.

A winter storm had caused some problems, however. The connecting flight was delayed, and the tired group was forced to stay overnight in Chicago. Once the runways were cleared, they were back in the air, but Bella knew she wouldn't feel completely at ease until they were all safe and warm and together.

She searched the streets again and Edward kissed the top of her head. "Relax. I just checked, and the plane landed safely. The rental car has four-wheel drive. They'll be fine."

The phone rang and Edward squeezed Bella once more before releasing her and crossing the room to answer it. Bella watched him anxiously as he spoke, and Edward smiled and nodded at her in reassurance.

"They're on the way," he said once he'd hung up the phone. "They just dropped their luggage at the hotel and they should be here in a few minutes."

Bella nodded in acknowledgement. "Did you put the fresh towels in the guest room?" she asked nervously.

"Yes. It's all ready," Edward replied indulgently. Although they would have enjoyed having the whole family stay with them at the apartment, there just wasn't enough room. Fortunately, there was a nice hotel just a few blocks away, so at least everyone would be close.

Bella stretched, pressing her hands to her lower back with a slight groan.

"Tired?" Edward asked, moving behind her to massage her aching muscles.

"A little," she admitted, "My back is just killing me today."

"Hmmm…" Edward murmured, rubbing circles into her back with his thumbs. "Maybe after we get everyone settled you can have a nice bath."

She leaned back into him. "That sounds wonderful." The sound of a buzzer interrupted their quiet moment, and Bella straightened quickly. "They're here!" she exclaimed, hurrying over to answer the buzz.

"Hello?"

"Merry Christmas!" A chorus of voices crackled over the loudspeaker. Charlie's voice then added, "Let us in. It's freezing out here!"

Bella laughed and buzzed them in, opening the door so she could watch for them coming down the hallway. Edward stood next to her, his arm over her shoulders. "Excited?" he asked. She looked up with glowing eyes and popped up on her tiptoes offer him a smacking kiss.

"This is the best Christmas gift ever!" she told him, turning back down the hallway as the elevator doors opened.

Then they were there…and the sounds of laughter and "I missed yous" and "Merry Christmases" filled the hallway as they all made their way into the apartment.

"Hope you're all hungry," Bella announced once they'd all settled inside.

"Starved," Carlisle and Charlie said simultaneously, causing another round of laughter.

Edward and Bella had set up a buffet of finger foods and Christmas treats, and the group filled their plates and took their seats in the living room in front of the crackling fire, and a brightly lit Christmas tree.

Edward found it difficult to eat. Instead, he looked around the room, considering how his life had changed in the past two years.

First, there was Bella. His eyes lingered on his wife, glowing and radiant in the light from the Christmas tree. It reminded him of when he first saw her in New York at the party at the Four Seasons…before his life had taken it's rather unusual turn.

But she looked different now, too. Of course, she was still beautiful, but as Edward caught her eye and a genuine smile lit her face, his breath caught – as it often did when he saw her smile.

She was his. And she was happy. It was everything he wanted. His eyes trailed down to her belly. Well, almost everything.

Theirs had been a whirlwind courtship. After the week they spent together in Forks, they both knew they didn't want to waste any more time. He'd had to return to New York for his new job, and Bella went on her book tour, but they spoke every night – either on the phone or on the Internet. Edward smiled at the thoughts of some of their more interesting Web dates.

God bless Skype.

She'd come back to New York for Valentine's Day and Edward knew he couldn't wait any longer. He proposed on one knee in front of the Four Seasons, offering her his heart and a diamond ring. She'd cried and smiled and said yes. They were married six months later, to the delight of their families. Well, to the delight of Edward's family anyway. Chief Swan was his usual restrained self, although Edward felt he was warming to him.

Chief Swan caught Edward's considering look and his eyes narrowed.

Okay. Maybe not.

Even Bella's globetrotting mother Renee had managed to make it to the wedding, taking a brief sabbatical from her teaching assignment in Korea. She wasn't able to make it for Christmas, but promised she'd visit in the spring to see the baby.

Spring. In the spring, they would close escrow on their new house. Yes, Edward was leaving Manhattan and moving to the suburbs.

He even had a few flannel shirts.

He and Bella would miss the city, but they both agreed it would be better for the children. Well, _child_ for now, but Edward was hopeful. They both were.

Bella could write anywhere, of course, and had decided to cut back on traveling and book tours once the baby arrived. That was one good thing about her success – she no longer _had _to promote herself. Her books kind of sold themselves.

Especially her most recent one. _Second Chances_ had debuted at number one on the New York Times Bestsellers list and stayed there for twelve weeks.

Edward was right…people did love a happy ending.

As for his job at the network, Edward was enjoying staying closer to home. Once they moved, he would have to commute into the city, and he'd still have to travel occasionally, but he knew they would make it work.

It was something he'd come to grasp only recently – the fact that he and Bella were better able to deal with the challenges of their life together now than they were all those years ago. They'd both had the opportunities to grow – both professionally and personally – over the decade they were apart.

If anything, it made them appreciate each other more, now that they'd found each other again.

Edward's eyes moved to his sister where she sat next to Jasper Hale. The sight of them together made him smile. Edward and Bella had made sure the two were seated next to each other at their wedding reception. It had taken very little encouragement for them to realize they were meant for each other.

They planned to get married the following summer.

As for Rosalie, it had taken a little more convincing to get her to give Emmett McCarty a chance. You sure couldn't tell it now, though. Edward smiled at the dreamy way she was looking up at Emmett as he dramatically told a story about the hotel where they stayed in Chicago. He and Rose had been living together for about four months, and seemed to be incredibly happy.

Edward's gaze landed on his parents, and he searched for the right word to describe how they felt about becoming grandparents. _Thrilled_ was too tame. _Ecstatic_ was closer, but still didn't quite suffice. He and Bella had decided to start a family as soon as possible, and his parents were the first people they told when they found out she was pregnant. He knew they'd be frequent visitors once the baby arrived, even if they did live on the other side of the country.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Bella wince. He slid closer to her on the sofa, reaching out to rub her back. "You okay, baby?" he asked, leaning close to murmur in her ear.

Bella nodded. "Yeah. Just tired. Too much excitement I guess," she replied with a weak smile.

"Let's get you that bath and to bed," he said quietly. "The family will understand."

Bella nodded again, laying her plate on the coffee table as Edward helped her up.

"Everything okay?" Carlisle asked in concern.

Edward smiled, continuing to rub Bella's sore back. "Yeah. The baby's just telling Bella she needs some rest."

"Edward?" Bella's trembling voice drew his attention.

"Yeah, baby?"

"I don't think I need rest," she said hesitantly.

"But you said you were tired."

"Uh…yeah…"

"Bella, what's wrong?"

"Umm…I think it's time."

"Time for what?"

"_Time_ time."

Edward stared at her blankly for a moment. "Shit," he said finally, his heart beginning to pound in his chest. "Are you sure? Isn't it too soon?"

"Uh," Bella said nervously, gripping his arm as her face clenched in pain. "Considering the fact that I think my water just broke, yeah, I'm pretty sure."

"Shit!" Edward exclaimed again. "Shit!"

"You already said that," Bella said with a wry smile that quickly turned to a grimace.

In that instant, the room erupted in chaos.

"What do we do?"

"Bella, maybe you should sit down."

"We need to get to the hospital."

"Shit!"

"Okay, everyone hold it!" Esme's quiet voice took on a tone of authority and everyone was suddenly silent. She turned to Edward. "Does Bella have a bag packed?"

Edward nodded dumbly.

"Okay, go get it." She turned to her husband. "You. Get Edward's car. Emmett, get the rental. Alice, help Bella get some dry clothes, but make it fast."

Alice took Bella's arm gingerly and led her into the bedroom. Bella called out over her shoulder. "The doctor's number is by the phone, would someone please call him?"

Rose was assigned that task, and within a few minutes, Edward, Bella, Alice, and Esme were in Edward's car, heading to the hospital, the rest of the group following behind in the rental car.

"Oh God, Edward, it hurts!" Bella moaned from the back seat, where Esme held her hand, stroking her hair back from her face.

"I know, baby," Edward said, working hard to keep the panic out of his voice as he sped down the icy streets. "Do the breathing…like in class, remember?" He breathed along with Bella as he prayed he'd get them all to the hospital safely.

They pulled up in front of the emergency entrance and Edward had a brief, agonizing flashback to the last time he'd been to an ER. One look at Bella's pained face pushed that memory away, though.

She needed him. He wasn't going to let her down. He took her hand as a nurse helped Bella into a wheelchair. "It's going to be okay, baby," he murmured, pressing a kiss to her forehead and taking her hand. You can do this. I'll be with you the whole time."

Bella nodded, breathing deeply as Edward turned to the nurse. "We're already pre-registered," he told her. "Dr. Jenkins is on the way."

The next few minutes were a blur of nurses and machines and breathing and moans. When the doctor swept in and, after a brief examination, announced it was time to head to the delivery room, Edward's heart stopped, then sped along crazily.

"It's time, Bella," Edward whispered, as they rolled her down the hallway. "He'll be here soon."

"Edward, I'm scared."

"I know, baby. I'm scared too," he confessed. "Hold my hand. You can do it. It's almost over."

Edward looked into Bella's eyes as the doctor said, "Now, Bella. Push now!"

He held her hand as she gritted her teeth, bearing down again and again as she fought to bring a new life into the world.

"Stop now, Bella. Don't push for a minute," the doctor said. Bella turned crazed eyes to Edward.

"Almost there, baby," he encouraged, kissing her hand. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," she said weakly.

The doctor's firm voice cut into their bubble. "Okay, Bella. One more should do it, on the next contraction, push hard. Let's say hello to this little guy, okay?"

Edward held her hand, but as she pushed, he couldn't keep his eyes on hers. Instead, they drifted down to the doctor…to his hands between his wife's legs…to the miracle he was witnessing before his very eyes.

One second, the doctor's hands were empty. The next, they were filled with a wiggling mass of arms and legs.

"Oh my God," Edward breathed. "He's here."

"It's a boy," Dr. Jenkins announced.

"Is he okay?" Bella asked, struggling up onto her elbows so she could see her son.

"He's perfect," the doctor assured her.

A nurse wiped the little boy off a little before wrapping him up quickly and handing him to his mother.

"Oh!" Bella exclaimed. "He's so pretty!"

Edward chuckled. "Boy's aren't pretty, Bella," he corrected, blinking through tears as he looked down at the sleeping child.

"Well, he is," Bella said stubbornly, her own tears trickling down her cheeks. "He's beautiful."

Edward leaned down to kiss her. "Yeah, he is," he admitted.

They both stared at their new son, not even noticing the staff working in the room, or when they finally left to give them some privacy.

"Thank you," Edward told Bella quietly. "I can't—"

Edward never finished his sentence, because at that moment, his son opened his eyes. Like all babies', they were kind of gray, but in that instant, Edward knew they would be brown.

Dark brown, like his mother's.

"What is it?" Bella asked.

"It's…it's him." Edward's voice was full of awe. His son looked up at him and Edward couldn't explain it, but he _knew _him. He _recognized_ him.

"Him?" Bella repeated. "You don't mean…it's can't be…"

Edward turned to her, his eyes once again filling with tears. "It is. I don't know how it's possible, but it is."

Bella looked down at her son, turning him in her arms so she could look into his face.

"Hello, Masen," she said, her own voice cracking with emotion. "It's nice to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you, sweetie."

"Masen," Edward breathed, his heart nearly bursting with the realization that the son he thought he'd left behind…that he had begun to doubt ever really existed at all, was right in front of him. "I missed you, buddy." He touched the little boy's hand, and Masen wrapped a chubby fist around Edward's finger. Edward grinned through his tears, suddenly sure that in a few years he'd be back in a room like this, meeting a little girl with crazy red hair and green eyes like his.

"Mrs. Cullen?" A nurse walked into the room tentatively. "Your family's asking to see the baby. Is it all right if I show them in?"

Bella smiled brightly. "Yes, of course. He needs to meet his family."

They came in with bright smiles and tears, passing little Masen around from aunt to uncle to grandpa to a very possessive grandma. They welcomed him to the world with gift shop flowers and balloons and a huge teddy bear. And before they left in the early morning hours to try and get some much deserved sleep, they each said goodbye with a gentle touch to his little head or a kiss to his cheek.

The boy would be loved.

When the room was quiet again, Bella drifted off, and Edward picked up his son and carried him to the windows overlooking the city.

"We're going to have so much fun," Edward promised him. "I swear, you can count on me. I won't let you down."

Another thing Edward was grateful for – among the many things Edward was grateful for – was that he still had his grandfather's cufflinks in this life. He hadn't given the heirlooms much thought when he'd impulsively jumped on that plane two years earlier. Not that he wouldn't do the same thing again, but he was happy he remembered about them once they landed. A quick call to the hotel had secured his possessions until he returned to New York – including the little box he kept tucked deep in his duffle bag. One day, he'd pass the cufflinks on to Masen, along with the pocket watch…and a certain little silver bell.

Masen fussed, his mouth rooting around, and Edward turned to wake Bella.

She opened sleepy eyes, holding her arms out to take the baby, and settling him against her breast.

Edward stood with his hands in his pockets, looking down on his wife as she nursed his infant son. He fingered the little bell he now kept on his key ring, a constant reminder that sometimes life took funny turns…that love was always worth fighting for…

And that miracles happened every day.

~0~

Outside Room 665 at Lenox Hill Hospital, a blonde man and woman stood together in the hallway, watching the events inside the little hospital room with smiles on their faces. People passing by avoided bumping into them, kept away by an unseen force, although they didn't really _see_ them.

They _could _have seen them, if they were looking. But people so rarely _really_ looked.

"Masen?" Tanya questioned, turning to the man standing next to her. "Did you do that?"

Michael shrugged. "That's out of my job description," he said simply.

Tanya smiled, her attention drawn back by a laugh inside the room. Edward had settled on the side of the bed, and was playing with his son's fingers and smiling at Bella.

"I'm glad we came back," she murmured quietly. "It's nice to see things are working out for them."

"Yeah," Michael replied. "There's something special about them, isn't there?" He watched for a moment before tilting his head toward the exit. "Come on. It's time to go."

Tanya turned to walk down the hallway, taking one last look at the happy family before she stepped away.

"You did a good job," Michael stated as they made their way to the stairs.

Tanya's gaze snapped to him. "Thanks," she said with a bright smile, reaching out to loop her arm through his. "Does that mean I'll get my own assignment soon?"

Michael rolled his eyes. "You tired of working with me already?"

"No, it's not that," she said playfully, hugging his arm as they walked out onto the streets of New York. "It's just…after all the training I've had, it would be nice to know that someone has some confidence in my abilities…get a chance to spread my wings, so to speak."

Michael laughed, taking a deep breath of the crisp winter air. "Like I haven't heard that before," he said. "You know it's not up to me. I'm sure you'll get your chance when it's time. Just be patient."

"Like I haven't heard _that_ before," Tanya muttered.

"Look," Michael said softly, distracting Tanya from her thoughts. She turned to the horizon, where the first light of dawn was peeking over the skyline. "No matter how many times I see it, it always takes my breath away," he added.

They stood quietly amidst the bustling city streets, ignoring the crowds and the cars. Their eyes were on the sky, watching the twisting and twirling ribbons of color – pinks and oranges and yellows finally giving way to pale blue as the new day broke.

Their minds were on the little family back at the hospital that was just starting a new life together.

Michael took a deep breath. "Perfect," he said, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of Tanya's head. "Merry Christmas, Tanya."

She smiled sunnily back up at him.

"Merry Christmas, Daddy."

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**A/N: (Updated 12/3/13) If you'd like to download a free copy of Do Over to your e-Reader, it's now available in MOBI, EPUB and PDF formats. Link is on my profile. :-)**


	19. Epilogue, Part II: Visions of Sugar Plum

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N:**After I posted "Do Over" last Christmas, a few people requested a bit more – particularly about the kids. Here it is. It's just a little holiday gift to thank you all for the wonderful support you've given me and my stories over the past year. It really means a lot to me.

Special thanks to **mariahjilE**for pulling last-minute, uber-fast beta duty on this.

**WARNING:**This story contains schmaltz, sappiness, and generous doses of schmoop. Read at your own risk.

* * *

**Epilogue, Part II: Visions of Sugar Plums**

_Nine years later…_

First, a whisper.

_"Daddy?"_

Then, a little bit louder.

_"Daddy?"_

Edward shifted slightly under the warm blankets, his face pressed into the pillow as he mumbled incoherently. It had been a late night at work, and Saturday morning was for sleeping in, after all. He hadn't even bothered to set his alarm clock.

Apparently, though, someone else had a different idea. A little hand shook his shoulder once...twice. Then his morning visitor released a heavy sigh, obviously considering a different approach. Edward was just slipping back into a deeper sleep when tiny fingers prodded at his eyelids, gently prying them open, and the blurry mass of white and red before him slowly took shape. Wide green eyes peered into his only open one, so close he could see the little flecks of gold and darker emerald in the bright irises.

"It's time to wake up, Daddy," she whispered, blinking owlishly.

Edward stared at her through his one open eye. "Makenna, what are you doing? What's wrong?" he grunted into the pillow.

"Nothin," she said. "It's time to get up!" She finally released Edward's eyelid and stepped back to twirl in a quick circle. It's time to go see Santa!" she squealed, throwing her hands up and bouncing on her toes.

Edward still didn't move, lifting his gaze to the clock on the nightstand. "Baby, it's five in the morning. The mall doesn't even open for hours."

Makenna frowned. "But you have to get ready."

"I don't need five hours to get ready."

"You said you'd make pancakes," she reminded him in a sing-songy voice.

"Makenna," Edward groaned, rolling onto his back and throwing an arm over his eyes. "It's too early."

His daughter stepped to the side of the bed, placing her little hands on his cheeks and tilting his face to hers. "But I have to write my letter to Santa," she said quietly. "I need you to help me, Daddy."

Edward gazed into Makenna's pleading green gaze, the mirror image of his own, and knew he was lost. His daughter had him wrapped around her little finger, and he found it extremely difficult to deny her anything, especially when she asked for his help.

"Okay," he said finally.

"Yay!" she shouted, jumping up and down.

"Shhh!" Edward hushed her, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "Mommy's still sleeping."

Bella groaned slightly, rolling over on the other side of the bed. "You're kidding, right?" she said wryly, shoving her hair back from her face. She sat up, rubbing a hand over her growing belly. "It's been a whole two hours since I've had to pee."

Edward smirked, reaching over to touch her stomach and then leaning down to kiss it. Bella was six months pregnant with their third child – their surprise – the one Edward hadn't known was coming. After Masen's birth almost nine years ago, they'd waited anxiously for Makenna's arrival. When she'd shown up four years later, they'd assumed their family was complete. Then, the past summer, Bella found herself rushing to the bathroom for the third day in a row. At first, she'd dismissed it as food poisoning, but when the morning sickness continued, they'd both quickly realized a third child was on the way. Once the shock wore off, they were both thrilled, actually reveling in the fact that they didn't know what to expect. When the doctor asked them if they wanted to know the baby's sex, neither had hesitated in telling him "no."

As exciting as it was to see the children from Edward's strange other life appear in this one, he and Bella felt this child was even more of a miracle in some ways.

Edward smiled at the thought. His whole life was a miracle, really.

"Daddy!" Makenna hopped up and down a few times, demanding his attention.

"Okay, okay," Edward muttered, getting out of bed and kissing her on top of the head. "Let me take a quick shower, beautiful. Then I'm all yours."

"Makenna?" Bella slid to the edge of the bed, and Edward saw her eyes narrow on their daughter as he grabbed his bathrobe. "What in the world are you wearing?"

For the first time, Edward took a good look at Makenna's outfit and couldn't keep back a choked chuckle when it fully hit him. She wore the new red velvet dress Bella bought for her Christmas pictures, but evidently, Makenna didn't feel that was Christmassy _enough_. Underneath, she had added a bright green tulle skirt from her dress-up chest, as well as red and white striped tights and sparkly red Mary Janes she'd received for her birthday; the girl was obsessed with _The__Wizard__of__Oz._ She'd also added a bright green sweatshirt with an embroidered Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer on the front, as well as a white cardigan with sequined poinsettias for buttons.

Makenna had attempted to tame her wild hair – apparently with every red, white, or green barrette she owned. Half of her bronze curls lay matted to her head, the other half sprouted wildly, clipped in haphazard tufts. On top of it all, she wore a sparkling tiara from the past Halloween's princess costume, tilted just a little to the left. It slid a bit more when she tipped her head, her fists propped on her hips.

"It's _festive_, Mommy," she said with an exaggerated eyeroll that spoke to Edward of what lay ahead for her teenage years.

Bella stood up, reaching for her hand. "Maybe a little _too_ festive, sweetie," she said with a smile. "You know what they say. 'Less is more.'"

Makenna's brow crinkled. "That doesn't make sense, Mommy."

Bella paused, curling a lock of Makenna's hair around her finger. "Think of it this way. If you're _too_ festive, you might make all the other little girls feel bad that they're not festive enough."

Makenna considered that a moment, then smiled brightly. "Okay, Mommy." She skipped out the bedroom door and Bella cast an amused glance at Edward over her shoulder.

"Not bad," he admitted, more than a little impressed.

"That's why I'm The Mommy," she said with a grin, following her daughter to her bedroom.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

By the time Bella made it to Makenna's room – after a brief stop in the bathroom, thanks to the child currently taking up residence on top of her bladder – her daughter had obviously made another dive into the dress-up trunk. Apparently, a Superman cape and a pair of green fleece mittens with the word "Ho" embroidered on the back were necessary additions to her holiday ensemble.

But before Bella could say anything about it, Makenna plopped on her bed, patting the space beside her.

"Mommy, I have a serious problem," she said. Her brow furrowed as her tiara tipped over her eye, and she shoved it back distractedly. Bella sat down next to her daughter, wondering what could have sparked such a change in mood.

"What is it, baby?"

"I'm not a baby, Mommy."

"You're _my_baby," Bella insisted. "Always will be."

Makenna shook her head slightly, but let it slide, glancing toward the door and lowering her voice.

"I'm worried Santa won't bring Masen any presents," she said.

Bella smiled. "Of course he will, sweetie. Masen's been a very good boy."

Makenna's eyes narrowed. "He pulled my hair the other day. And he says girls are stupid."

"He doesn't really mean that, honey. And he said he was sorry about pulling your hair."

"But that's not the worst thing, Mommy," Makenna said in a hushed voice, her eyes growing wide. "I don't think Masen _believes_ in Santa anymore."

Bella blinked, surprised. "Why would you say that?"

"I heard him talking to Ben," she whispered. "Ben said only babies believe in Santa, and Masen said, 'Yeah.'"

"And you think he won't get any presents because of that?"

Makenna nodded soberly.

Bella leaned over, touched by her daughter's concern, and kissed her lightly on the forehead. "Don't worry, baby. Even if Masen doesn't believe in Santa, I know for a fact Santa believes in him."

"Really?"

Bella nodded, running her fingers over Makenna's soft cheek. "He'd never do anything to hurt your brother, sweetie. You don't need to worry, okay?"

Makenna thought for a moment, then smiled brightly. "Okay, Mommy."

"Now," Bella said, standing up. "I think you need to take all of this off for now, at least until after breakfast."

Makenna's shoulders stiffened, and Bella braced for an argument.

Thankfully, it only took a little convincing for Makenna to trade her "festive" outfit for something a little more breakfast-friendly. Once she was dressed in a t-shirt and jeans, Bella kissed the top of her head and sent her off to the kitchen, telling her she'd join her after another trip to the bathroom.

"But Mommy, you just went!" Makenna said with a pitying shake of her head.

"I know, baby. I know," Bella replied. "Go on now. I'll be down in a second."

Bella was so intent on her goal that she didn't notice that her daughter didn't go downstairs right away. Instead, she watched her mother go into the bathroom, then tiptoed down the hall to Masen's room. With a quick glance back and forth to ensure she wouldn't be caught, she slipped into the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind her before making her way to his cluttered desk. Luckily, she knew just what she was looking for, and it only took a moment before she slid it carefully into her pocket, patting it gently.

With an ear to the door, she paused before quickly exiting the room and heading down the stairs, singing "Jingle Bells" with a smile on her face.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

Edward had only spared a few minutes for his shower, dressing quickly and rubbing a towel over his head before running his hands through his hair to tame it. He headed down the hall, smiling at the sound of the heated discussion coming from Makenna's bedroom.

"But I need to be ready, Mommy!"

"Sweetie, you can't go to the mall for hours, and you don't want to spill syrup on your pretty dress, do you?"

"I won't spill," Makenna said stubbornly. "I'm not a baby!"

Edward smirked and slipped by the room unnoticed, not even feeling a little bit guilty for avoiding the conflict.

It was a girl thing, after all, he told himself.

He made his way downstairs and into the kitchen, quickly gathering the ingredients for his world-famous pancakes.

Okay, they were Bisquick, but he did add chocolate chips on special occasions. That counted for something, right?

He had just put the electric griddle on the counter and was measuring out the pancake mix when his son shuffled into the room in his pajamas, rubbing at his eyes, his hair sticking up in every direction.

"Why is everyone up so early?" he grumbled, glaring out the still dark windows. "It's still night time."

Edward smiled at Masen, ruffling his hair and earning another half-hearted glare. "Your sister's a little excited to see Santa today."

Masen rolled his eyes, taking a seat at the breakfast bar as Edward poured in the milk and began cracking eggs. "Do we have to go?" he asked.

His father paused mid-egg-crack. "Since when don't you like to go see Santa?"

Masen just shrugged, avoiding Edward's eyes as he crossed his arms on the countertop and lay down his head.

"Masen?" When the boy didn't move, Edward leaned over, touching his head softly. "What's wrong, buddy?"

He peered up, frowning slightly. "Ben told me the truth...about Santa," he said.

Edward forced a benign expression, reaching for the pancake bowl and turning his attention to whisking. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"He told me there is no Santa."

"What?" Edward whisked a little harder. "Why would he say that?"

"He snuck into his parents' bedroom and looked in the closet. He found all his presents," Masen said flatly, his unwavering eyes watching for his father's reaction. "He asked his big brother about it and he told him Santa isn't real."

Edward sighed heavily, silently cursing little Ben Cheney. He had hoped he'd have a few more years before he'd had to deal with this. It wasn't that he enjoyed lying to his son, but the wide-eyed awe at the magic of Christmas was something rare and short-lived, and he hadn't been in a rush for Masen to outgrow it. He could also sense that his son was waiting for him to confirm or deny his suspicions. His father's word obviously outweighed that of his friend or his friend's big brother.

But although he wanted Masen to hold onto his childhood for as long as possible, Edward wouldn't outright lie to him. Instead, he scooped pancake batter onto the griddle, asking quietly, "And what do _you_think?"

Masen was silent for a long moment. "I don't know," he said finally. "What do you think?"

Edward should have known he wouldn't get off that easy. He smiled at his son. "Well, I believe in lots of things that most people don't," he said. "I believe in magic and miracles. And I would never be the one to say Santa isn't real."

Masen considered that. He knew all about Edward's strange trip to his alternate life, and that he – and his mother, for that matter – both believed it was real. He didn't know what to think about it but would never voice his doubts to his father.

He was only eight – almost nine – but he knew enough to know that no man wanted his son to think he might be crazy.

Edward seemed to know what he was thinking anyway, so he reached over and ruffled his hair one more time. "What you believe is a choice, buddy," he said quietly. "You have to decide for yourself what you believe. There's no way to know for sure if you're right or not. That's why they call it faith." He stiffened at the sound of Makenna singing as she came down the stairs and turned to flip the pancakes. "But do me favor, okay?" he added. "Until you figure it out, don't ruin things for Makenna. She's really excited about seeing Santa."

Masen rolled his eyes, still confused and feeling a little too old for all of this. He was, however, also unwilling to hurt the little sister he loved, despite the fact she sometimes annoyed him to death. He smiled slightly. "Okay, Dad."

"Thanks, buddy," Edward said, sliding a plate of chocolate chip pancakes toward his son and turning back to make another for his little girl.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

"How do you spell 'Dear?'" Makenna asked, red crayon clutched carefully between her fingers.

Bella smiled at her. "D-E...Masen, don't play with your milk, please."

Masen grunted, but stopped blowing bubbles into his straw.

"D-E…?" Makenna prodded.

"Sorry, baby. A-R."

Edward handed a plate of pancakes to Bella as she sat down between the kids. "You sure you don't want to come today?" he asked.

"How do you spell 'Santa?'"

"S-A-" Bella said, taking a bite of her breakfast. "Wish I could, but I've already put off this interview twice – N-T-A." Since _Second__Chances_ was made into a TV movie, it had become a holiday classic. As a result, Bella was always in high demand during the Christmas season. The local station was putting together a Twelve Days of Christmas special and asked Bella to be part of it. She would be one of several local celebrities to share their favorite holiday traditions. That left Edward to take the kids to the mall to see Santa and find a Christmas gift for his wife.

The mall, the Saturday before Christmas. Edward had covered wars and natural disasters, but he had to admit to more than a little trepidation at the thought.

He wasn't complaining though. This was the first year he'd actually have some time off over Christmas since he took over the nightly news, and he planned on enjoying every moment of it.

It was a lesson he'd learned years ago and one he still took very seriously.

"How do you spell 'want?'" Makenna asked.

"I don't know why you're writing a letter anyway," Masen grumbled. "Do you really think Santa has time to read _all_of the letters from _all_of the kids in the world?" He raised an imperious eyebrow and Makenna's lip trembled slightly.

She steeled herself, however, her chin lifting. "The elves help," she said simply.

Masen snorted, and Edward shot him a warning look before answering Makenna and spelling 'want.'

"Daddy, can Claire and Roger come with us to see Santa?" she asked, adding some red and green swirls around the edge of her letter.

"Uh..." Edward glanced at where Makenna's favorite doll sat on the countertop near her, unseeing eyes focused on the letter she was writing. Next to the doll, a G.I. Joe given to Makenna by her brother lay on its side, dressed in its trademark camouflage pants and combat boots, but inexplicably wearing one of Barbie's flowered halter tops. Makenna loved the action figure, but it made Edward more than a little uncomfortable. Bella just laughed at him, assuring him it was perfectly natural for his daughter to have a cross-dressing army man named Roger.

Edward, however, was certain there was Ken doll living in a loft in Tribeca, brokenhearted and alone.

"Probably better to leave them at home this time," Edward answered, ignoring Bella's smirk. "Wouldn't want them to get lost."

Makenna nodded absently. "How do you spell, 'Barbie Sisters Traveling Camper?'"

For a moment, everyone just looked at Makenna, unblinkingly. She just stared back. "Roger likes camping," she said simply.

Edward rubbed his forehead, but Bella just smiled. "Honey, why don't you just draw a picture? I bet Santa would like that."

Makenna grinned. "Good idea, Mommy." She reached for another crayon and began to sketch out Roger's soon-to-be RV.

"Shoot, I've got to go," Bella said, glancing at her watch as she took her plate to the sink. She kissed Edward lightly. "Good luck today," she said. "I'll see you when you get back." She turned to Makenna. "Remember what we talked about, Makenna. The dress and the shoes...and let Daddy do your hair, okay?"

"What about the tights?" she asked stubbornly.

Bella sighed. "The tights are okay."

"And my pretty crown?"

"No crown," Bella said firmly. Makenna frowned, but with a glance at her father, a slow, mischievous smile lit her face.

"Okay, Mommy," she said obediently, but Edward recognized that smile.

The girl was going to talk him into the tiara.

Bella raised an eyebrow at him, obviously thinking the same thing, but Edward just shrugged. "Give me some credit," he said. "I can totally take her."

When they finally got in the car, hours later, Masen wore a nice red sweater and jeans and Makenna her red dress and sparkly shoes.

And the tiara.

It had taken an offer of hot chocolate and cookies to get her to leave the Superman cape at home.

Edward thought he got off easy.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

The screams cut through the air, Edward's shoulders hunching under the high-pitched assault.

"Nooooooo!" the toddler shrieked, blonde curls sticking to the tears on her cheeks. "I want to ride the horsie!"

Her mother hushed her gently. "If you're good and smile pretty for your picture, you can ride the horsie after."

The girl's sobs cut between her words, hiccups of gasping breath. "I. Want. To. Ride. The. Horsie. NOW!"

Edward curled an arm around a wide-eyed Makenna as Masen looked up at him.

"Wow," the boy said under his breath. "Somebody needs a time out."

Edward bit his lip to keep from laughing, ignoring the glare from the little girl's mother. They'd been waiting in line for Santa for a half an hour and had barely moved ten feet. He couldn't blame the little girl for her meltdown.

Although, he had to admit he was glad he wasn't the parent on the receiving end of it.

Then, like a disease spreading through an unvaccinated population, it began to spread. First, it was just an irritated rumble.

_"How long do we have to wait?"_

_"Where is Santa?"_

_"I'm tired."_

But the rumble grew, amplified, until the screams and sobbing multiplied into a virtual wailing Armageddon.

_"I don't want to be quiet!"_

_"I'm hungry!"_

_"I want to go HOME!"_

Edward could swear he heard the theme song from _Apocalypse__Now_.

He watched in shocked amazement at the ripple effect of the toddler's tantrum, frantic parents hushing and pleading and bribing and stuffing pacifiers into gaping mouths.

But it was too late.

One by one, they were picked off. Disgruntled parents packing up their screaming children and abandoning the line in favor of the food court or the toy store, living to fight another day.

Edward felt a little bad for them but couldn't keep down a little thrill of victory as they moved forward in the line.

All's fair in love and war. And waiting for Santa.

He tucked a hand in his pocket, the other gripping Makenna's lightly. Her narrowed eyes scanned the area carefully, her letter to Santa clutched tightly in her fist.

"What are you looking for, Makenna?" he asked.

"Santa," she whispered.

"He's right over there." Edward released her hand to point to the big red throne at the front of the line. "You'll see him in a minute."

Makenna looked at him like she couldn't quite believe he had said that. "That's not the _real_ Santa, Daddy."

Edward wasn't sure how to respond, but Makenna continued without his input. "That's the _pictures_ Santa. The real Santa doesn't have time for this. That's why he has helpers."

Masen snorted, and Edward elbowed him lightly.

"There he is!" Makenna exclaimed suddenly, then she was gone, darting through the gaps in the crowd and across the mall, one hand holding her tiara in place.

"Makenna!" Edward shouted, grabbing Masen's hand and dragging him along in her wake. "Come back here!"

Panic rose in his chest as he kept the head of red curls in his vision, breathing a sigh of relief when she finally stopped in a small hallway between two shops. She looked up at a janitor holding a mop in his hands and gestured wildly, only glancing back toward Edward once he touched her arm.

"Makenna, you can't run off like that," he said, crouching down to look her in the eye, his worry tempered by relief. He glanced up at the janitor. "And the nice man is trying to work, sweetie. We should leave him alone." He straightened, taking her hand. "I'm sorry about this," he told the man.

"Daddy, no," Makenna said, pulling free of his grip. "It's _Santa_!" She widened her eyes to emphasize her point, and Edward turned to the man apologetically. He had to admit the man did look like Santa with his close-cropped white beard and white hair curling out from beneath a baseball cap. His blue eyes twinkled merrily, his cheeks pink from the exertion of mopping the hall. He was big, although not the bowl-full-of-jelly round usually associated with Santa Claus, and wore a stained gray jumpsuit, a white rag hanging over his shoulder.

"It's all right," the man said with a wink. "It happens all the time."

"Makenna, come on," Masen said quietly. "This isn't Santa. Let's go get our pictures taken so we can get our hot chocolate."

Makenna glared at him. "Masen, it _is_Santa. Look at him."

"He just looks like Santa," her brother replied, irritation winning over. "He's a janitor."

"He _is_ Santa!" Makenna shouted, stomping her foot, and Edward winced as a few heads turned their direction. He feared a full-on meltdown could be on the way and ran his hand through his hair, trying to find a way to diffuse it.

He didn't have to, though, because the janitor just crouched down and tapped Makenna on the nose. "Well, Makenna, have you been a good girl this year?" he asked.

Makenna nodded, then winced, shooting a glance at Edward. "Most of the time," she admitted.

"She's been very good," Edward interjected, thankful that the tantrum had been averted. He ignored Masen's annoyed grunt. Evidently, he didn't agree.

"Ah, that's wonderful," the janitor said with a wide smile. "And what would you like for Christmas?" he asked.

Makenna bit her lip, looking briefly over her shoulder at her brother. She held out her letter. "It's all in here," she whispered.

The man took the letter. "Ah, good idea. Write it all down so I get it right."

"I had to draw some pictures 'cause I don't know all the words."

"That's fine," he said. "I like pictures." He stood up, nodding at Masen. "How about you, son? What would you like for Christmas?"

Masen flushed, his gaze falling to the floor as he shrugged. Edward wrapped an arm over his shoulders, reaching for Makenna with his other hand.

"We really should be going," he said. "Thank you so much...Santa. Sorry to bother you."

He started to walk away, but Makenna darted back, throwing her arms around the janitor's neck and whispering frantically in his ear.

"Makenna!" Edward groaned, embarrassed and irritated. He pulled her arms free, apologizing again for his daughter's enthusiasm.

The janitor grinned, standing up and leaning on his mop. "No problem at all."

"You won't forget?" Makenna asked soberly.

He smiled at her. "Not a chance. You all have a merry Christmas."

They returned the sentiment before Edward led them back to the line for Santa pictures.

The _end_ of the line.

Edward sighed, shifting on his feet as Makenna bounced excitedly, chattering about this and that. Masen was quiet, and Edward saw him glancing toward the hallway every now and then, even though the janitor had moved on.

"You okay, buddy?" he asked. Masen just nodded.

Eventually, they made it to the front of the line, and Makenna skipped over to hop up on Santa's knee, Masen dutifully standing on the other side of the jolly old elf. (He'd argued he was way too old to sit on Santa's lap and Edward didn't push it.) Santa ho-ho-hoed and bounced Makenna on his knee before asking what she wanted for Christmas.

"Well, I'd like an Easy Bake Oven, and a dress for Claire – that's my doll – and a Barbie Sister Traveling Camper for Roger..."

"Roger?"

"He's my other doll."

"He's an _action__figure_," Masen corrected, "and his name is G.I. Joe."

"No, his name is _Roger_," Makenna insisted, eyes flashing.

A girl wearing an elf costume popped in with a wide smile to interrupt the escalating argument with a candy cane. Santa flashed her an appreciative look and turned to Masen.

"And what would you like, little boy?"

Masen bristled at the "little" comment, but at Edward's pointed glance took a resigned breath.

"A dog," he said.

Edward grimaced, shaking his head slightly as Santa's eyes darted his way. They'd had numerous conversations about a dog, but he and Bella agreed that with their busy schedules, it wasn't really fair to bring one into the house.

Masen didn't agree.

"A dog is a big responsiblity," Santa said soberly. "Maybe you should wait until you're a little older."

"I'm almost nine."

"Well, what else would you like? Maybe a football? Or a cool video game?" He glanced up at Edward, who nodded imperceptibly.

Masen sighed, defeated. "Yeah, that would be cool," he admitted. "Or a skateboard?"

"Sir?" A quiet voice drew Edward's attention from his children. He was surprised to find the janitor standing next to him, holding out Makenna's letter. "I thought you might want to have this."

Edward took the envelope, smiling at the drawing of a stick figure in a red suit across the front. "Thank you," he said, tucking it into his pocket quickly with a surreptitious glance toward his kids. The little elf was back, drawing their attention to the camera and waving a handful of jingle bells as she counted to three. They smiled widely as the camera flashed and Edward couldn't hold back a smile of his own.

He turned back to the janitor, but he was gone. Edward spotted him heading toward the food court, pushing his cart and nodding at the people he passed.

"Daddy?" Makenna tugged at his sleeve, sucking on her candy cane. "Can we go get hot chocolate now?"

Edward nodded as they turned toward Starbucks. The janitor had disappeared, probably into the bathrooms, so Edward just took his children's hands and led them through the crowd.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

"So, how'd it go?" Edward asked, crossing the bedroom to rub Bella's shoulders. She sighed, relaxing into the massage, and Edward kissed her temple.

"Good," she said with a shrug, leaning back into him. "You know those interviews. They're all basically the same. How'd it go at the mall?"

Edward wrapped his arms around her, running a hand over her belly. "Good. Fine."

"Any surprises?"

"Masen tried to ask for a dog again," he said, and Bella laughed. "Think we nipped that one in the bud. But he did mention a skateboard, too."

"I picked one up last week."

"And that's why you're The Mommy," he said, nuzzling her neck. "What are the kids doing?"

"Playing in their rooms," Bella replied. "I can't believe it's so quiet."

Edward hummed, nosing under her hair to press a kiss at her nape. "Maybe we can take advantage of that."

Bella's shiver belied her words. "It's the middle of the day."

"So?" he said against her skin, his tongue darting out to taste. "We'll be quiet."

"You sure?" she asked, covering his hands with her own and interlacing their fingers. Edward spotted the flush working its way up her neck and instantly knew the reason. Bella had always been especially self-conscious while pregnant, and making love in the light of day still made her nervous, even after all of these years.

"I'm always sure," Edward told her, running his nose along her hairline and nibbling at her earlobe. His hands rubbed lovingly over her belly and she stiffened.

"What's wrong, baby?" he asked.

She shrugged. "I don't know. Just feeling...fat. And old. You know the P.A. at the shoot today called me ma'am?" she said with an incensed glance over her shoulder. "Ma'am for God's sake."

"Asshole," Edward muttered, a smile quirking his lips.

"Shut up." She tried to look annoyed, but Edward caught the smile she tried to hide.

Edward squeezed her a little tighter, resting his chin on her shoulder. "Baby, first of all, you're not fat." At her disbelieving huff, he added, "You're pregnant, carrying my child..." He stroked her stomach to emphasize his point. "...which is so incredibly sexy, by the way."

She tipped her head as he kissed her neck again. "Yeah?" she asked, a little breathless. He'd said it all before, but he knew every once in a while, she needed to hear it again.

"Mmm hmmm..." he murmured, trailing little wet kisses along her nape. "And you're not old. You're more beautiful every day." It was cliche, and he knew it, but it was also true. Despite the fact that she'd just turned forty-three, Bella's skin remained soft and unlined, except for a few little crinkles around her eyes when she smiled. Her hair was still thick and brown, a fact he'd complained about when his own sprouted bits of gray along the temples. Bella had just laughed and told him gray made him look distinguished, but Miss Clairol kept her from the same fate.

He didn't care. She was perfect. And he still wanted her. All the time.

"You say the sweetest things," Bella murmured, turning in his arms and trailing her hands up his chest to link them around his neck.

"I'm a sweet guy," he said with a cocky grin before leaning down to kiss her softly. Bella whimpered, her fingers tangling in his hair as she tilted her head to deepen the kiss. Not for the first time, Edward wondered at the quick jolt of heat that passed between them at a time like this, that it was still just as sharp, just as electric as it ever was.

Slipping his fingers under the hem of her shirt, Edward slid it up as they shifted toward the bed. Bella stumbled, falling back onto the mattress with a slight shriek, and Edward followed, bracing himself on his arms to avoid slamming into her.

"Oops," she said with a grin, rucking his shirt up over his head, eager now. Edward lifted hers as well, planting a soft kiss to her stomach before running his fingers lightly over her breasts. Bella arched, extra sensitive due to the pregnancy, and Edward took the opportunity to slip a hand under her back to unhook her bra. Eyes widening at her larger size, he licked his lips.

Bella giggled. "You look like a starving man at a buffet."

"This is a definite perk of the whole pregnancy thing," he muttered, leaning down to circle her nipple with the tip of his tongue.

"Oh, God," Bella moaned. "Edward!"

"Shhhh..." he whispered, sucking gently as she writhed beneath him, fingernails scrabbling at his back as she wrapped her legs around his waist. Edward's hips rotated against hers slowly and she reached between them, blindly searching for the button on his jeans.

"I need..." she mumbled.

"Yeah." He lifted his hips, hissing as she unzipped him, the back of her fingers brushing over his erection. He slid her leggings down over her hips, taking her mouth in another drugging kiss.

"Mommy?" A tiny fist knocked at the door, and due to years of training, Edward reflexively grabbed the comforter, flipping it over both of them.

Bella's head flopped back against the bed in frustration. "What is it, baby?"

"Masen's going to flush Roger down the toilet!"

In the distance, they could both just make out Masen's outraged voice. "She won't stay out of my room!"

"I just wanted to play with you!"

"You break all my stuff!"

Edward collapsed on the bed next to Bella with a heavy sigh, carefully sliding her leggings back up. She sat up, and he re-hooked the bra behind her back.

"Rain check?" he asked, kissing her shoulder.

Bella smiled softly. "You got it."

"Mommy!"

"I'm coming!" Bella called out as she pulled her shirt back on, grateful that the little girl hadn't just barged in.

Edward zipped up his pants but reached out to grab her arm as she passed him.

He kissed her fast, hard, and deep. When he pulled back, Bella inhaled shakily.

"I love you, baby," he said quietly.

She smiled and touched his face. "I love you, too."

Hand in hand they walked out of the room to save Roger from his watery doom.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

The next few days flew by in a flurry of shopping and wrapping and various other Christmas activities. It was strange not to have any extended family on hand for the holiday, but with Alice and Jasper expecting their first child in a few weeks, Edward's parents felt they needed to stay close to them this year. After years of living together, Rosalie and Emmett finally took the plunge and got married – eloped, actually – and were in Hawaii for their honeymoon. Charlie had agreed to cover the holiday shifts for a co-worker whose wife was in the hospital. Even though he was semi-retired, he still kept busy with the department and often filled in whenever there was a need.

They'd considered packing up the kids for a trip to Washington, but Bella's doctor put the kibosh on that when her blood pressure popped up a bit too high. She was fine, but he said flying was probably not the best idea at the moment.

So, it was just the four of them this year.

It was harder for Bella than Edward, but she tried to enjoy the quiet time with her family. And the knowledge that the rest of them would all come to visit the following summer to see the baby helped.

To be honest, Edward enjoyed the low-key celebration. The quiet and relaxed atmosphere around the house was something he'd come to treasure. He'd cuddle up with Makenna before her nap, reading a story until she could no longer keep her eyes open. Or play catch outside with Masen, even after it started to snow and their fingers grew numb, despite their gloves. They baked and decorated cookies and Skyped with the grandparents. And Edward loved every minute of it.

On Christmas Eve, they gathered before the television for what had become a family tradition.

"Got the popcorn?" he asked Bella as he grabbed an assortment of juice boxes from the fridge.

She dumped the second bag into a large bowl with a smile. "Extra butter," she said, slapping his hand as Edward grabbed a handful.

Masen called out from his position sprawled on the floors. "What about the M&M's?"

Edward produced a bag of the candy, ripping it open and dumping it into the popcorn bowl with a grin, much to his children's delight. They tossed it together, popping handfuls of the warm, melty combination into their mouths as Bella turned on the TV. She curled into his side with Makenna lying across their laps as Masen propped his chin on his fists from his spot on the floor.

"It's time!" Makenna said happily, clapping her hands as the title _Second__Chances_appeared on the screen.

Bella smiled softly and Edward reached down to take her hand as the main character – Evan in the movie – sat at a bar, nursing a drink and mourning the loss of the love of his life.

Even after all of these years, it was still strange for Edward to see his story on screen, acted out by other people. Bella changed some of the names and places when she wrote the book. Bella was Bridget, and she was headed home to Portland, instead of Forks, when Evan found her at the end of the story. But other than that, it was all pretty true-to-life. He smiled when Evan encountered Michael for the first time outside of the bar...and winced when Rosalie (Rachel in the movie) beaned him with a duffle bag when he tried to go home after spending the night on Alice and Jasper's (Amy and Jacob's) couch.

Makenna squealed with glee when her character first appeared on screen. "That's me!" she said excitedly every time "Mallory" said or did something especially cute. "That's you, Masen," she'd add when her TV brother rode his new bike and confessed to ringing his father's magical bell.

Masen, however, was uncharacteristically silent. He watched the movie closely, and every now and then Edward would feel his gaze. But when he turned toward his son, he'd quickly look back at the television. Bella just shrugged, widening her eyes in an unspoken expression of uncertainty and worry.

When Bridget was rushed into surgery and Michael the angel appeared to send Evan back to his world, Makenna looked up at Edward, lip trembling.

"Did Mommy die?" she asked quietly, and Edward's heart broke. It was the first time she'd put together the pieces of the story, realized that, although Edward lived here and now, there was a very real possiblity that the _other_Edward and Masen and Makenna had to go on without their Bella. He glanced at Bella, who discreetly wiped some tears from her eyes before gathering Makenna close, planting a kiss on her head.

"I'm not sure what happened when I left," Edward said truthfully, "but I think that when I came back here, maybe the Edward that belongs there went back. I believe he was happy to get back to his Masen and Makenna...and Bella." He reached over to squeeze his wife's hand and she nodded encouragingly. "I think they're all together somehow."

Makenna bit her lip, eyes wide as she considered that. Then she nodded. "I hope so. I hope the other Makenna has her mommy and her daddy." A moment later she squealed, her sadness forgotten as she saw her newly-born brother cradled in his father's arms on television.

"That's you, Masen!" she said, clapping her hands.

Masen rolled his eyes. "You say that every time," he grumbled, but Edward could just make out a hint of a smile as his TV counterpart kissed the baby on the forehead.

They watched the rest of the movie in silence, applauding as the credits rolled.

"I love that movie," Makenna said sleepily, her eyes drooping.

"I know, sweetie," Edward said, picking her up. She rested her head on his shoulder, arms and legs dangling loosely.

"I'm tired, Daddy."

"I know. Time for bed."

"But I want to stay up for Santa," she said, a huge yawn stretching out the words.

Edward chuckled as he started up the stairs. "You have to go to sleep if you want Santa to come. He sees you when you're sleeping, remember?"

"He knows when you're awake," she sang sleepily.

"That's right." He carried her into her room and put her to bed. She snuggled into the pillow, her dolls clustered around her, tangled amidst her riotous curls. Edward sat down next to her, sweeping her bangs away from her face. Of course, they fell right back down.

"I'll see you in the morning, beautiful," he said quietly, leaning down to kiss her forehead.

"Don't forget Claire, Daddy."

"Of course not," he said with a grin, kissing the doll's head lightly.

"And Roger."

Edward frowned. Roger had dressed for the holidays in his army-issue green vest – no shirt – a pair of red shorts, and a Santa hat. Edward pulled the sheets up enough to cover the shorts and dutifully planted a light kiss on the hat.

"Okay?" he asked.

"Okay," she said, satisfied, pulling Roger a little closer as her eyes fluttered closed.

"Good night," Edward whispered.

Makenna's lips lifted, but her eyes stayed closed. "Sweet dreams."

"My love is in the moonbeams." Edward flipped off the light, leaving the door cracked as he walked into the hall. He spotted Bella standing outside Masen's door.

"Everything okay?" he asked quietly.

"I'm not sure." She stepped away from the door, leaning toward him so as to not be overheard. "I'm worried about him."

Edward sighed. "I know. That Cheney kid's a pain in the–"

"Edward!"

"I know it's not his fault. I just hoped..."

"You hoped he'd be a little kid a while longer," she finished. "Me too. He just seems so...sad."

"Yeah." He wrapped Bella in his arms, laying his cheek on her head as she rested against his chest. "I'll go talk to him."

Bella nodded, heading into the bedroom as Edward opened Masen's door, eyes scanning the room with a slight smile. It was a mess but not any more so than Edward's was at his age. Posters of sports stars and favorite movies (mostly sci-fi and fantasy) papered his walls, interspersed with his own drawings. Masen had shown a passion and talent for art at a young age, and his desk was covered with various drawings in progress, as well as notebooks filled with his own sketches. Edward smiled at the sight of a drawing of him and Bella currently in progress. Although the strokes were still childlike, he definitely could recognize himself thanks to the trademark crazy hair, and Bella's belly was slightly rounded, the curves smudged where Masen had repeatedly erased to get it just right.

His son lay sprawled on his stomach, face turned away from the door. He didn't move, but Edward knew he was awake and crossed the room, stepping over toys and discarded clothing before sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Hey, buddy," he said quietly. "Can we talk?"

After a moment, Masen turned his head, still lying on his stomach but with wary eyes on his father. "Am I in trouble?"

"No!" Edward said with a laugh. "No, of course not, but..." He leaned down, bracing his arms on his thighs as he looked at his son. "It seems like something's bothering you. You want to talk about it?"

Masen just shrugged.

Edward ran a hand through his hair. "Sometimes it helps to talk things out, you know."

"I know. It's just..." He hesitated, not meeting his father's eyes.

"Just what?"

"I don't want you to get mad."

"I'm not going to get mad," Edward promised, reaching out to rub his back gently. "I promise. You can tell me anything."

Masen was silent for a long moment, then finally rolled over onto his back, biting his lip.

"Do you..." he began. "Do you _really_think all of that happened to you?"

"All of what?" Edward replied. "Oh, you mean the movie?"

Masen nodded nervously, obviously worried about his father's reaction. Edward realized that somehow Ben Cheney's comments about Santa had cast a doubtful shadow over everything Masen believed, including the outrageous story about what his father had been through. At the same time, it was obvious he didn't _want_ to doubt. He was caught in that limbo between childlike faith and adult reality, and he wasn't sure if he should move forward or try with all his might to stay behind.

Edward wasn't sure how to help him, other than to tell him the truth.

"Yeah," he said. "I do. I believe it all really happened, just like your mom wrote in her book...just like they showed in the movie."

"You don't think it was a dream, maybe?"

Edward reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys, the little silver bell tinkling lightly. "Nope. I have too much proof," he said. "This bell, for one thing. Then, there's you and your sister. You're just as you were there – well, a little older now – but other than that, you're exactly the same. And there's no way I could have dreamed of you before you were born, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Masen admitted. "But did you ever tell anyone, and they didn't believe you?"

Edward sighed, flicking at the bell once. "I'm not going to lie to you, buddy. I was very careful who I told about what happened. I know it sounds crazy, and I knew some people would think I was making it up, or maybe even lying.

"So I only shared the story with the people I trust most: your mom, your grandparents, our family and friends."

"But don't you want everybody to know?" Masen asked. "Don't you want them all to believe you?"

Edward smiled. "That's the thing. I don't need that. I know what happened. That's all that matters." He slipped the bell off his key ring, holding it in his palm for a moment before setting it on Masen's bedside table.

"Maybe you can hang on to this for a while," he said. "It's always helped me to remember that I don't know everthing there is to know about the world. And that's okay, you know? There are mysteries and magic out there that we can't understand. I truly believe that, Masen. I hope you can too. It makes life really exciting."

Masen's eyes focused on the bell, but he said nothing.

Edward leaned down to kiss his forehead. "Good night. Sweet dreams."

"My love is in the moonbeams," Masen mumbled out of habit, but it was clear his attention was on the bell and everything it represented.

As Edward walked out of the room, he heard the quiet tinkling of the bell as Masen closed it in his fist.

.:~:._.:~VoSP.:~:._.:~:.

"Daddy, wake up! It's Christmas!" Makenna's squeal roused Edward from his sleep, and he was halfway out the bedroom door before he actually realized he'd gotten out of bed. Makenna gripped his hand, dragging him down the hallway.

"What time is it?" he asked, voice raspy with sleep.

Bella stumbled out behind him. "Little after seven."

Edward yawned. It had been a short night. In what had become a family tradition, they'd gathered in Masen's room just after midnight with a birthday cake ablaze with candles. Edward and Bella knew that sharing a birthday with Christmas could be a little disappointing, so they'd taken to having a birthday party with his friends on his half-birthday every year. But on his actual birthday – Christmas Day – they always had a special family celebration, gathered around his bed in the darkness of the first minutes of the day. After singing a sleepy "Happy Birthday," Masen had opened his presents, and it had been after one before they'd all gotten back to bed. And the rule was no one was allowed to start on the Christmas presents until after the sun was up.

"You said seven, Daddy," Makenna reminded him, skipping along happily. "I had to stay in my bed until the little hand was on the seven. It's on the seven now."

"Yeah, you're right," Edward admitted, rubbing a hand over his face. "Where's your brother?"

"He's already downstairs. But he said he would wait. He knows he has to wait," Makenna chattered. "I already peeked. I have lots of presents, Daddy. LOTS of presents."

Edward smiled at her. "Of course you do. You were a very good girl."

Makenna just grinned before releasing his hand and running down the stairs. "Here they come!" she shouted.

Bella caught up, leaning against him as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "You ready for this?" she asked.

He inhaled deeply, the scent from the automatic coffeemaker perking him up already. "Once I get a cup of coffee, I'm good to go."

"Thanks for rubbing it in," Bella grumbled. "Can you bring me some decaf?"

Edward got the coffee, and by the time they all settled before the tree, the first light of dawn began to peek through the windows. He sipped from his cup, relaxing on the couch next to Bella as the kids tore into their presents. Ribbons and scraps of wrapping paper flew through the air, settling into a crumpled mess across the floor. The kids smiled and shouted as they discovered what they'd been given; art supplies, a football and skateboard for Masen, and Makenna got her Easy Bake Oven and Barbie Camper. She happily put Roger in the driver's seat before setting the oven up in the corner, flipping through the packets of cake mix and frosting. Masen fiddled with the wheels on his skateboard but seemed distracted, checking under the tree again before curling up in an easy chair with his new colored pencils and beginning to draw.

After the dust had settled, Makenna left her new oven to climb up into Edward's lap.

"Tired, baby?" he asked, kissing the top of her head. Bella got up and began to organize the gifts and pick up the mess.

"Not really," she said sadly.

"What's wrong?"

She glanced at her brother, cupping her hand around her mouth as she whispered, "Santa didn't bring me what I asked for." Her lip trembled as she blinked back tears, and Edward's stomach clenched.

What had they forgotten?

"But...you got your camper and the oven and the dress for Claire," he pointed out. "That's what you asked Santa for. I heard you."

She shook her head, sniffling slightly. "No," she whispered. "I mean the _real_Santa. I thought he would give it to me because I tried so hard to be good." Her voice cracked.

"You were good," Edward stressed as Bella looked at him questioningly. He just shrugged in response, pointing a look at Masen, sensing that Makenna didn't want him to hear for some reason. Bella took the hint, asking him to help her take the trash out to the cans. Once they were out of the room, Edward turned Makenna in his lap so he could look into her watery eyes.

"You were very good," he repeated. "We just don't always get what we want."

"But – But I told him it was the _only_thing I really wanted. That if he could give it to me, I didn't have to have any other presents."

Edward felt tears pricking his own eyes at his daughter's misery. "Baby, what did you ask for?" he asked desperately, thinking if it meant that much to her, maybe they could go out and get it for her. Maybe hide it somewhere so she could discover it later.

He was desperate to make her feel better.

"What was it?" he pleaded, brushing her hair off her of tear-streaked cheeks.

She sniffled. "I asked him for Masen to believe in him," she said quietly.

Edward's heart sank. "Oh, sweetie..." he began.

"Mommy said even if he doesn't believe in Santa, he would still get presents," she said. "But...he needs to _believe_, Daddy. I just wanted him to believe." She began to sob and Edward held her close, rubbing her back and unsure of what to say.

"It's okay, honey. Don't cry," he urged.

Then, just as Masen and Bella came back into the room, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" Masen shouted, and – to his surprise – Makenna perked up, swiping at her eyes as she raced after him.

"What in the world is going on?" Bella asked.

"I'm not sure. Makenna was just-"

A loud shout cut off Edward's words, and the two of them hurried to the front door, only to find Makenna watching, wide-eyed as Masen giggled hysterically, rolling around on the floor...

...with a puppy.

A big, gangly, long-legged, big-footed, floppy-eared puppy.

"Where in the world did he come from?" Edward asked, mystified.

Masen jumped to his feet, rushing over to his father, his face glowing. "He was just sitting on the front porch," he replied. "It's Riley, Dad. Santa brought him after all. He is real!"

"What?" Edward looked at Bella nervously. "Masen, where did this dog come from? He probably belongs to someone. We need to check his tags."

"I did, Dad!" he exclaimed, jumping up and down. If Edward hadn't been so confused, he might have smiled at the boy's genuine excitement. "Look!" he said, wrestling with the puppy and running his finger along his red collar to a shiny silver tag.

Edward and Bella leaned in. Surely enough, it said "Riley" but nothing else, no phone number or address.

Not wanting to quash Masen's enthusiasm but worried someone in the neighborhood might be missing a dog, Bella dropped to her knees, rubbing the puppy's belly. "Sweetie, he's a really cute puppy, but we can't keep him," she said. "We need to find out who he belongs to."

"No, you don't understand," he said emphatically. "This is _Riley_! I drew a picture of him." He stood up abruptly. "I'll show you!" he shouted, racing up the stairs to his room. Edward noticed Makenna frozen in place, staring at the puppy.

"He did it," she breathed. "He really did it!"

Masen returned with one of his notebooks, dropping onto the floor and flipping through the pages frantically.

"I can't find it," he muttered. "It was right here." He tossed the book aside, reaching for the dog and scratching him behind the ears. "It doesn't matter."

Masen looked Edward straight in the eye. "You have to believe me, Dad. This is Riley. This is _my_ dog. Santa is _real_." He stood suddenly, reaching into his pocket and pulling out Edward's silver bell.

"It's true, Daddy," Makenna chimed in, jumping up and down excitedly. "Santa did it! He did it!"

"It's a miracle, Dad," Masen added, holding the bell out to his father. "You're the one who told me they're real, remember?"

Edward took the bell, nodding slowly and unable to speak.

"But even if you don't believe me, it's okay," Masen added. "Because I _know_it's true."

At that, Edward's head snapped up. Regardless of where the dog came from and what had really happened, his son needed him to believe. If not in Santa, then at least in him.

He knew what that felt like.

Edward dropped to his knees and took his son gently by the shoulders. "I believe you," he said, looking intently into his eyes. "I do."

Masen smiled brightly, and Edward found himself smiling back.

"Edward?"

At Bella's questioning gaze, he nodded firmly. "It's true," he said. "This is Masen's dog. This is…Riley." They'd figure it out. If someone came looking for the dog, they'd offer to pay for him or replace him. He had to give this to his son.

"Yay!" Masen squealed. "Can I take him out to the back yard?"

"Yeah, sure," Edward said, ruffling his hair. "Put on your coat and hat, okay?"

Masen raced back to his room to get his coat, and Makenna grabbed Edward's hand.

"You see, Daddy? He really was Santa Claus!" She jumped up and down, chattering excitedly. "I knew he was when I saw him, and then I gave him the drawing because I knew it was what Masen wanted more than anything, and I told him that I just wanted Masen to _believe..._"

"Makenna," Edward interrupted, shaking his head. "What are you talking about? What did you do?"

She looked down at her feet, whispering the words in a rush. "I know I'm not supposed to go in Masen's room," she said, biting her lip nervously, "but I just wanted to help. So I took one of his drawings."

"Oh, baby," Bella said, crouching down to give her daughter a hug. "That's not so bad. I'm sure Masen will forgive you if you give it back."

"But...but I can't," she said. "I don't have it anymore."

Edward felt a strange tingle of awareness running up his spine. "Sweetie," he asked, "what did you do with the picture?"

She looked up at him, unsure if she was going to get in trouble. "I told you, Daddy. I gave it to Santa."

Masen rushed into the room at that moment, gathering the puppy in his arms, and Makenna took a deep breath.

"I took the drawing," she told him. "The one of Riley. I gave it to Santa. I'm sorry I went in your room, but I just-"

Masen grinned, cutting her off. "That's okay, Makenna," he said gleefully, too caught up in the excitement to even think about being mad. "I don't mind. Come on! Let's go play with Riley!"

Edward watched them leave, frozen in shock. His mind raced to try to make sense of what had happened.

Something strange. Something _impossible_.

Again.

You'd think he would have gotten used to strange and impossible things at this point.

"Edward?" Bella reached out to touch his cheek. "Are you okay?"

Without a word, Edward turned, went to the hall closet and shuffled hangers until he found the coat he'd worn the day they went to the mall to see Santa...

"What are you doing?" Bella asked.

...reached into the pocket for the envelope he'd forgotten about, and pulled it out with trembling fingers.

"What's that?"

"Makenna's letter to Santa," he said. The envelope had been opened, so he reached in, drawing out Makenna's letter along with another piece of paper. He unfolded it slowly, knowing what he would find but still laughing out loud when he finally saw it.

"Edward?" Bella repeated. "What?"

He held it out to her and she gasped. Drawn in perfect detail, and signed by her son, was a sketch of the puppy that now frolicked in their back yard; long legs, big ears – one pointing up, the other flopping down – all black except for a light brown spot circling his left eye. Buckled around his neck was a red leather collar bearing a tag with the name "Riley" as plain as day.

"I don't understand," Bella said, awed. "How...Who...?"

Edward grinned, taking Bella's hand and leading her to the back of the house where they could look out at their two children playing in the yard with the puppy.

"It's a long story," Edward said. "We were at the mall, and there was this janitor, and Makenna was convinced he was the real Santa-"

"Wait a second," Bella ordered, holding up a hand. "Let me get my laptop. I have a feeling I'm going to want to write this down."

Edward laughed as Bella ran to the office, then he turned out to look out at the backyard. Masen lay on his back on the snow-covered grass, laughing hysterically as Riley licked his face. Makenna skipped around them in a circle, her unzipped coat billowing around her, eyes glowing with excitement.

And in that moment, he realized that the man from the mall, whoever he was, had somehow given his children more than just a puppy.

He had given them one more year of magic, one more year of innocence.

One more year of childhood.

And in doing so, he'd granted Edward's Christmas wish as well.

He shook the silver bell lightly before putting it back on his key ring and dropping it into his pocket. Bella raced back into the room, setting the laptop on the counter and booting it up.

"Now start at the beginning," she ordered, fingers clicking on the keys, "and don't leave anything out."

Edward crossed to her, closing the laptop gently. "Later," he said, taking her hand and leading her to the back door. "Let's go play with the puppy."

And that's just what they did.

* * *

**A/N: **If you'd like to see how I picture Masen and Makenna, check out the banner on my profile.

Thanks for reading - wishing you all joy and magic this holiday season. See you in the New Year with Cutlass!

**A/N: UPDATED 7/23/12 - PLEASE SEE MY PROFILE for important information about my stories. Thank you! :-)**


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